Married šŸŸ, does this travel lifestyle help your marriage? Iā€™m hearing some colleagues refer to the time away as ā€œrefreshingā€ and it gives them a chance to miss their SO. Thoughts?

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Iā€™ve been married for 2 years. My husband and I have never lived together full time (heā€™s former military). In the last year, itā€™s gotten to the point where he really wants me to be home. We have two high energy dogs that are our kids. I hate waking up on Mondays and leaving him. The weekends never feel long enough. It used to be ok since it was more than we saw each other when he was in the military, but we want a normal life now.

So, Iā€™ve been applying elsewhere. Unfortunately, Iā€™m not having any luck.

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Not married yet and just bought a house with my SO... now that we have a home together and with the dog (had the dog before the SO) I just miss being home. While heā€™s so supportive itā€™s getting harder to leave when you want to make a home and planning marriage/kids in the near future. Just donā€™t know how people do it.

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Lifeā€™s short. Youā€™re in charge.

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Left Big4 because of the strain on my marriage. We have two little kids and it was overwhelming for my wife.
If you have kids, itā€™s not fair to them to only see them on weekends.

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Good for you!

Iā€™m (obviously) still with a Big 4, but spent a lot of time in town because of my focus on local clients. My advice to working parents is to figure out what really matters to your kids and show up for that....I picked the events that mattered to them (chaperoning field trips, class parties, sporting events, etc) and prioritized those - and then skipped the rest when I had to.

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One of the reasons I'm ok with if. Can't say I feel the same about my dog though.

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I just like to focus on work at work. There is a lot of negative stress overflow into home life in my opinion that comes with the type of work we do.

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Been doing it 30yrs would not change a thing. Not going to lie, it takes work in both sides. We both travel every week so that helps Iā€™m sure since 1 of us is not stuck at home. DINK here. (Double income no kids)

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Trust me SC would not have done it had we had kids.

If you ask my parents they'll tell you the only reasons they're still married is because my dad travels

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I know many people that are in that boat. And several that I know got divorced after the travel stopped

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Travel is hard on kids. When my daughter was 9 she once said I would rather be poor than having you work at Deloitte if it meant you would be home more.

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I sure hope so...

Sometimes wish weeks were longer spending more time away.

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Yeah you should prob figure this out...

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It's about finding what works for your relationship. And things can change that'll make you reevaluate your priorities. I have 2 kids in the mix now and I feel the guilt of my wife taking on a full load of responsibilities. Then again, just because you're not traveling doesn't mean you're 100% present at home, which is can be an issue in and of itself.

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Not here. Iā€™ve been traveling weekly since January and my wife asked me ā€œwhen will this end?ā€ She didnā€™t elaborate if sheā€™s asking about the travel or the marriage.

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Your travel is creating the marriage conditions. I said this above - life is short and youā€™re in control. What are your priorities?

I would say itā€™s helped considering weā€™ve both been super work focused and I can imagine there would have been strain if we were around each other more but not able to give each other the focus we were giving our work. However expecting first kid now and I can imagine it will change things and weā€™ll have to make lifestyle changes to accommodate that.

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When I first started traveling it was a nice change of pace, as I was struggling with my own independence and traveling helped show myself what I was capable of on my own. Now I'm pretty over it, traveling every week is exhausting. I don't feel I have enough time at home to enjoy the best part of my life, which is the time I get to spend with my husband. He's also been struggling lately with his personal mental health and I feel terrible that I'm not physically there during the week.

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So the answer is yes and no. SO and I both hate that we can't see be with each other every day, but we also make an effort to talk on the phone every night. Traveling does make us miss each other more, and maybe we do have more patience with each other because we know we should try to make the most of all the time I am home for; but we also both know how much happier we would both be without the sadness that comes with being apart and not getting to actively enjoy our lives together every day.

Does not help marriage. Distance makes the heart go fonder does not apply to weekly travel.

helpful

We both travel and itā€™s great to miss them while gone. No kids

Travel is a good break as long as it's not every week.

Does it HELP? Uh, no. Itā€™s doable, but I married the guy because I wanted to be around him. If I felt like your colleagues, I would have stayed single.

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