Mental wellness - anybody dealing with a narcissist spouse? And have had any success

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What are the signs? That term is thrown around quite a bit, but if they are truly a narcissist, there isn’t much you can do about it. A true narcissist will very very rarely ever change, and they will damage you in the process.

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OP, it seems like leaving him isn’t an option for you right now. But it may become an option with more intensive therapy, as A1 suggests. In the meantime, perhaps you remain engaged but don’t make any wedding plans. Ultimately, you need to discuss this with your therapist, not us. And if your current therapist thinks that you can learn to live a narcissist, then perhaps you need a new therapist.

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My boyfriend was married to one. In his situation divorce was the only option. He went through hell with her and I have first hand experience with how horrible she is. Granted, she refused to go to therapy (but claimed everyone else needed it because they were the problem).

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There is no success unfortunately
It’s slow death on the non narcissist side
I had the same experience and I’m more than happy to help explain further on a call with details

What ignites a narcissist
- seeing themselves superior than you
- demotivating you to become less superior
- discouraging to you constantly and seeing you run for forgiveness for a made up excuse or plot they made
- suck energy out of you, deprive you from what makes you happy that is independent from him (you might lose friends and family in the process)
- they want all your money, all your body and all your energy
- they will emotionally and sometimes physically abuse you


If you realise you are with one, congratulations that takes a lot of energy and thorough thinking and reflecting. My advise is get out! The sooner the better for you

Unfortunately it’s a condition and it never changes, but what you’ll realise is that you’re only wasting your time

All the best, it’s Not easy

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I’d be working towards leaving him. Narcissistic personality disorders are very hard to treat. That goes for all personality disorders. Narcissistic however is nasty. Signs of this type of disorder include taking advantage of others to meet their own needs, inflated sense of self, expectations of constant attention and admiration, easily irritated when sense of self is harmed (didn’t get the attention, etc), lack empathy, often unhappy or down but it’s someone else’s fault, lack introspection, etc etc.

Get your finances in order, meet w a lawyer and get out.

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