Most ridiculous title you’ve seen on LinkedIn? Bonus points for their real job title

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A1 rude 😂

likefunnyupliftingsmarthelpful

Donald Trump - “45th president of the US”
(Not on LinkedIn though, but just as ridiculous)

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47th soon

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Yea, it’s in Canada

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"Incoming analyst at ...”

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Hahah wow this is the biggest reverse catfish. They have so much hope, but so little comprehension

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Organizational effectiveness consultant

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Penetration Tester

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Yes, we even have a "Head of penetration testing" The grin on his LinkedIn pic says it all...

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Influencer.

likefunnysmartupliftinghelpful

“Founder at [one person LLC they ‘own’]"

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I think they're referring to people who create an LLC to fill employment gaps, but their LLC doesn't actually do anything. Like John Doe gets laid off and is suddenly founder at JD Consulting LLC with exactly zero clients and zero revenue. It's laughable.

likeupliftingfunny

Scrum master

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"Chief Imagination Officer"

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Incoming Interviewee Candidate

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Strategic dot connector

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Technology Evangelist

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Chief storytelling officer

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You think this is silly? I think it’s cool! Very common in higher ed and municipalities. A sort of combination of marketing and institutional historian using stories as a conduit.

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Tanning Consultant, Sandwhich Artist

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Fellow sandwich artist checking in. You had to earn that title...they didn't just give it to you day 1.

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Thought leader

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2006 Time Magazine Person of the Year.


This person was also a “Scrum Master"


Save you the Google: 2006 Time Person of the Year was “You”.

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A27 had to interview someone and that was their number 1 accomplishment. I made them explain it, even though I knew. They did not get hired.

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This one was mine at one point: Senior Manager, Global Biscuits Strategy

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My type of strategy!

Chief Millennial Officer

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“Catalyst” - this was a real title at my company

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Luggage issue at DU. How many points?

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Delta medallions who flew last Monday - do we get 20k points instead of the $200 dollar voucher or do we get both? Points hit my account but no voucher.

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Going to Italy this summer with my husband and spending a few days in Florence and Rome. Does anyone have Marriott suggestions? I’m looking to use points

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How many agencies give cost of living/yearly raises vs just a “yearly bonus” ?

Can ya guess which one Barkley is?

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Obligatory financial info post. 1) size of firm, 2) billable requirements, 3) salary, 4) bonus, 5) quality of life, 6) debt, and and 7) family/married/single. Go!

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I have been in SMB and MM sales but just started an Enterprise AE position. I’m working on email templates and am curious if any other Enterprise AEs would recommend separate email templates for companies with 250 users vs 1000+ users? My manager recommended setting up separate email templates but. I usually just have 2-3 generic plug and play templates that I tweak based on conversations/typical pain points. Just want to see if there’s a case for separate templates that I might be missing

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Hello Fishes,
I have dropped my resignation(in @Dassault Systemes) due to the unavoidable reasons(Bad management and poor working environment).

currently I don't have any offers in hand but I just can't work here due to the above mentioned points. We(myself & 2 more) have taken this step due to the fact that we need some peace in our life.

myskill sets - JavaScript, Reactjs(Redux), Vuejs, Nodejs, MongoDB(a bit) and AWS(certified practitioner).

Have we taken the right step?

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I just got a job offer for an Entry Level Software Engineer at Boeing in Saint Louis. The salary is $82,000 with an $8,000 sign on bonus. I was hoping for an offer closer to 90k base and I don’t care too much for a sign on bonus. However, this is a lot more than what I’m making now, and would be my first SWE job. Should I counter? If so, how would I go about doing that? Thanks!

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Got an offer as a Senior 2 in EY’s FAAS practice for $117,500 base and $12,500 bonus. Home office is San Francisco. Is this expected for that position? Any insights?

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Level: Staff
Rating: Progressing
SL: Tech Consulting
Bonus: 10%

Kind of disappointed with the VPB, the ones with differentiating got 21% that is a big difference. Was expecting around 15%. Anyways, now waiting for the hike but not keeping any high hope as I was expecting market correction. 😪

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Fish fam need advice. I have 70k in savings including emergency. Making 180k p.a including bonus, should I buy a condo for 350k. My lease is up for renewal soon and it bites me to pay 1900 in rent every month. Will be my first home purchase so feeling nervous, please help.

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Anyone looking to offload 40,000 bonvoy points?

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Best way to redeem UR points? If answer is travel, how do you know you're getting a good deal?

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Help!!! Hotel points or Flyer Miles? If in matters, I'm a Hilton/Delta guy. I'm trying to get a credit card from Amex to get the point from my corporate card... can't decide between hotel or miles.

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How MBB experience help with Warthon application. I work in analytics and want to get an MBA to get into more strategic positions ins Tech companies.

What are some strength points I should focus on? And common weaknesses. Any tips are appreciated!

Thanks in advance.

Had an initial interview and I was wondering if the salary told aligns(93k)

Anyone know the max salary for a Senior Analyst at Accenture 4yoe, living in LA. Also how much is the sign on bonus and is it negotiable?

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Selling my gmat books! I am officially done thank goodness. I actually have a ton - including OG 2020, 2019 and strat guides lol. dm me if interested! Located in LA so bonus points if you’re local

COWORKER 1: “I wonder if we’re getting holiday bonuses this year.”

COWORKER 2: “I see that you still believe in Santa.”

funnylikesmart

So who’s here with an offer already and waiting for the bonus payouts to submit resignation?

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More Posts

A teacher friend sent me this today asking if this is how I teach. I told her I sure would if someone got me that belt! 😂😂😂

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Hello Team,
I had recently applied for Technical solutions specialist - Infrastructure.
Not sure why my resume got rejected.
I highly doubt the resume got rejected by some automation tool.
Is there a way my resume can directly reach to hiring managers?

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My favorite meme (so far) about the firing-and-crying.

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Now I'm in a client location, My manager is a good person but he told me, I should report to Lead.

Lead is a psycho. He shows hell to the team members including me.
What should I do ?

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I have no problem lying to get what I want

likefunnyuplifting

Question for a crowd with good negotiation skills...my sibling is marrying someone of a different faith. My mom is freaking out and doesn’t want to go to the wedding. How can I resolve this?

Any art directors or designers looking for some small gigs? I need some help on my site and I’m willing to pay! All of my coworkers are too slammed right now but I’m hoping for something quick if possible?
Mostly mocking things up, maybe some gifs here and there and overall layout and flow. Currently using Squarespace. If you’re interested and looking to make a few extra bucks, paste your info below!

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How is an offer from Accenture Strategy for Management consulting in Industry specific domain Energy? How is the work culture and environment.

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What is senior consultant in HCL ? Is this designation good or should I ask for something relevant ? For E2.1 band

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How much hike does Nagarro give to freshers?
CTC - 4.5 LPA

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I am taking a interest only loan and lender has specified there is no prepayment penalty. Would I be able to pay extra to be used as principal payment in addition to the required interest payments per month

Hi
I have total 11 years of experience. Can I get any referral for java tech lead plz

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How to get into sales with no B2B sales experience? Currently working with a medical device company but very entry level position & looking to dive into sales but cannot seem to get anything back from applications. Know of any tricks?

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I’ve had a really hard time securing a permanent gig in the last 5 years…constantly being laid off or had a contract cut short. How do you know when to take a hint and realize that maybe this industry isn’t for you? I need some stability for once.

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Can someone refer me for a role at PwC please?

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Has anybody's Job confirmed without having a project (in bench for 6 months) in the Probation period in Infosys for laterals??

MBA 1st-year here - is it too soon to start networking with a firm with intention to re-recruit for full time in august? When is the earliest you recommend I start networking and potentially connect with a recruiter there?

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Hello fidelity investments guys,

Got offer from fidelity investments and told i will be mapped to brokerage technology. Not sure which bu it is. Any idea on this? And also what is the scope for development projects inside?

Tech stack : java, spring boot, angular
Exp : 7

PS : slightly worried as seeing many people saying there are less development projects in fidelity investments

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Additional Posts in Consulting

Most embarrassing example of "you're still presenting" you've ever seen?

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One friend said I look so much happier after going into consulting. Another friend said I sound like I’m “hooked”. Despite all the complaints I have I guess I’m pretty happy. Any 🐠 who feel the same?

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Left consulting for medical school a year ago and popping in cuz fb said they'd deactivate my account. How's it going, y'all?

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When your front-line clients send you a Snapchat of them singing Ke$ha's "Prayer" song with modified lyrics describing the shittiness of your tools

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How does one obtain the elusive "loving relationship" as a consultant? Prescriptive recommendations needed

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Learned that I’ll be laid off next week. Setting up networking meetings now to find something new, but know it will take time. How do you explain a lay off or gap in employment to potential employers?

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Ideally, at what level would a person with a SW Engineering degree, 3 years industry experience, 2 years MBA and 2 years Consulting experience be?

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When do you know you should quit without anything lined up?

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What's with all the BCG layoffs? My buddy was just let go....

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Going into Senior Associate offer negotiation with PwC London UK, what is the normal base salary expectation? Or even total salary expectation?

I was going to ask for 56k

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Have an offer for $30k more at Accenture, but chance for less ideal travel (60% chance of chi suburbs). Would appreciate any insight or advice as I am very torn.

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Tips on dealing with being extended on a project you have no interest in?

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How long is a clearance active if you are not billing to a clearance required contract?

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Do you believe work life balance can work in strategy and consulting? I personally do not...

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Should I have more vodka?

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PwC: for those laid off, how much does Cobra cost for us? Or can someone point me in the right direction? Only have 2 days to transfer 401k, wealth builder, and insurance/etc so scrambling now

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I am a SM hoping to make Principal. One of my development areas where I believe I can do better is Relationship Management and Sales. Any advice on courses, books, etc. to help improve?

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what difference does 109% vs. 100% utilization make at Year End? Latter basically means you took your PTO, former means you worked every minute of the year (Consulting, S&O)

Does anyone at Deloitte GPS like their job? Please share some positives before I hit accept...

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