{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "My best friend (lives in a different state) had a baby and I feel like we have nothing in common to talk about anymore. 😔\nAnyone else been in this situation?\n\n(Im not a baby person myself)", "post_id": "6147770f8f88520022c05eb2", "reply_count": 19, "vote_count": 7, "bowl_id": "58f7fc5fae9f610010f862d9", "bowl_name": "Women in Accounting" }

My best friend (lives in a different state) had a baby and I feel like we have nothing in common to talk about anymore. 😔 Anyone else been in this situation? (Im not a baby person myself)

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definitely. It happens with many situations - starts with dating (only hang out with other couples), then marriage (hang out only with married couples) then kids. I get it as kids consume your entire life and there is a natural attraction to share with others going through the same. I honestly drifted apart from all my married with kids friends as the only topic ever was kids. You can make this work provided you show interest in listening about her kid and she shows interest in listening to what is important to you. I rarely see this work out when one topic or the other is dominant.

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You don’t have to fake it if all they want to talk about is their kids then it is boring. If they are no longer providing balanced friendship or any intellectual satisfaction then move on to greener pastures. People grow out of friends all the time at different stages of life.

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Are you both married? I know it’s not the same thing, but just curious if your friendship already survived through that life change (one of you married, and talking about weddings and newlywed life and all that, and the other single). Friendships change, but if she’s an old friend, I’d try to keep the friendship alive. You can’t expect her to never talk about her baby (nor should you want her to!) since that’s the biggest thing going on in her life right now, but hopefully she’s still interested in you talking about the most important things in your life too.

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I'm in a relationship of 4 years. She met her husband, got married, and had a baby all within 2.5 years. 😅 But no I always ask about her baby and mom-life issues so I can be a good friend! Even though deep down I frankly don't care when she complains, she decided to keep the baby while we all thought she'd have an abortion (it was unplanned).

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Ask her about the baby and her life. In turn she will do the same. It’s really lonely after you have a baby and your friends without kids either drop you or distance themselves.

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She made the effort to come visit her husband, not me. She lived in a very small college town in the middle of a shit state and did not want anyone to visit her. Now they finally moved in and she is in a better city but because of covid and her being pregnant, no one felt safe to visit them. You never know with this virus.

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Yes except I'm the one with the baby

How do you feel?

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I'm having a baby 😊😊😊

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