My bf and I are currently in a long distance relationship. Closing the distance has always been one of our “hot topics”. We recently reached a “compromise” where I would relocate to where he is for a year or two so we could get our lives together started but when we are ready to plant roots and start a family we could come back. How do I stop getting this cold feet about moving?

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Not trying to talk you off the ledge but I feel like this may be an easy way for you to settle in at that location and change your mind (you’ll have friends there, begin developing roots, moving back Kay he a hassle, etc).

Some things you can do to be sure you’ll move back and know if you change your mind it’s for the real reasons
1) write a list of reasons why you want to move back (this may change eventually - e.g. if one reason is a strong support system)
2) ensure you sign a lease with a specified end date (1 or 2 years) with an option of month to month if you’d like
3) ask him to confirm logistically how he will move back - does his job allow him to pick up and leave? I’d be worried he will be locked in and change his mind
4) set a hard date or reason, you say “a year or two” but that leaves a lot up to interpretation. You could say 1 year max or until your lease is over

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Our problem has always unfortunately been there’s always so many missing pieces. Our 1-2 year time frame comes from the fact that we want to start settling down and starting a family by that time, (which I said I can’t have a family without my family near). We agreed that we may not even move back to where I am currently and ultimately will choose what’s best for us and our futures since that may include us ending up somewhere completely different. But thank you for the perspective, included some other things for me to think about!

D1s advice is GREAT from a planning perspective.
It’s hard to step out of your comfort zone and that’s why a lot of people don’t leave their home state/ region. If this is your first time venturing out, it’s an amazing life experience to have and you will absolutely not regret it. It was the best thing I’ve ever did in my life. I’m excited for you!

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