{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "My company is forcing me to disclose my gender pronouns in my email signature. I’m a straight male? I 100% support the LGBTQ community but I feel like this mandate is encroaching. I don’t feel empowered per the company’s announcement - I feel like I’m being indoctrinated.", "post_id": "5ee937d64afbaa002f6d39d4", "reply_count": 385, "vote_count": 56, "bowl_id": "5e6fe1c31f5e51001d267e46", "bowl_name": "The Work-Life Bowl", "feed_type": "bowl" }
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My company is forcing me to disclose my gender pronouns in my email signature. I’m a straight male? I 100% support the LGBTQ community but I feel like this mandate is encroaching. I don’t feel empowered per the company’s announcement - I feel like I’m being indoctrinated.

like
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Man, I need for peeps to say if they are lgbtq+ in these responses. If you aren’t in that group, some of these responses are very transphobic/homophobic and reaching real hard for some justification that isn’t that. My firm does it, you put it in your signature and it’s never brought up again. It’s helpful to not misgender people for whatever reason: cis peeps with gender neutral names and our trans & non-binary peeps. And if I see gender neutral pronouns I give them a mental high-five Bc they are either an ally or don’t need to put up with any extra BS beyond what the world already throws at them. Trans people are one of the most at-risk populations in the US, throw them a bone every now and then.

likeupliftingsmartfunny

You are correct EY 11.

Thank you for pointing that out, as it gives me an opportunity to correct yet another accusation that is false on its face from SA 2,

SA 2, I am not a racist because people demand to not listen to me and because I present a reasoned viewpoint that does not agree with their position.

I HAVE listened. It is an unwarranted fallacy to attempt to say that I am “not ready” to listen. Do not mistake not agreeing with not listening.

As to calling anyone racist, I have — correctly — labeled actions that are racist as racist. I hope that you would identify the content of the action rather than excuse content based on a label.

As I have amply pointed out, I have not shared my own personal labels because those labels are not connected to the content. I have done this for a very specific reason, as it is the content that does — and must — stand on its own merits.

My company has had pronouns in signatures the whole time I've worked there. I'm a straight cis woman (she/her) and I remember the recruiter had her pronouns (I now know also a straight cis woman) on her first contact with me and being over the moon that my potential new employer cared enough about the trans community to do this. It made me so much more excited to work for them. I've had a few vendors comment on it saying how thankful they are that we are a progressive and forward thinking company. It's such an easy way to be an ally for someone. I really hope you're able to see that adding your pronouns is a simple act of kindness and support. 💓

likefunny

I don't disagree with you, VP 1 based on OPs comments. The feeling you are having is why I used the examples I did. I chose not to directly call it out though, because I wanted to try to be positive about how easy this could be for OP to make a difference for someone else instead of attacking him. Maybe he posted here because he wanted to hear the other side and understand if it helps. It's no longer about treating others the way YOU want to be treated. To truly make people feel seen it's most important to treat people the way THEY want to be treated. OP - I hope you see this as an easy way to be an ally and don't overthink what it says about you. When I see pronouns on an email it tells me this person cares about others.

FWIW my name is gender neutral and I've had clients walk toward a man thinking it's me and it probably made them feel more stupid than it made me feel hurt. It prevents that, too.

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Recent IconRecent

Don't do it. That's crazy talk. There 2 biological sexes we are born with. They should assume your birth one until you say otherwise.

likefunnyupliftingsmarthelpful

Your analogy is wrong. This isn't like making everyone use a wheelchair. It's like making every office have a ramp.

Your analogy is just odd. By having people know you prefer to be "she" you lose nothing. How could that possibly be compared to being in a wheelchair?

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You could always say your preferred pronoun is “His Imperial Majesty”.

likefunnyupliftingsmart

There’s no scientific evidence that mammalians exhibit more than 2 sexes outside of homosapiens.

Just like Covid 19 required everyone to stay indoors until there was a false flag of racism requiring everyone to protest.


Psychology is a fake profession anyway or closer to being an expert at say pop culture. Sure people can find lots of meaning in Superman or Wonder Woman but it doesn’t make them any more real.

likefunny

Isn’t it normal for companies to mandate certain info in a signature (phone number, work address, etc)? Why should this be any more encroaching? They’re clearly just trying to make the workplace more hospitable to non gender conforming employees and it literally doesn’t cost you any social currency to list cisgender pronouns.

likehelpfulfunnyuplifting

I have a gender neutral name, and it is really helpful to let them know I am a woman. Little things like meeting someone for the first time in the building lobby, or clarifying that the little blond woman at the end of the table is, in fact, the main stakeholder and not the EA... All of that helps.

Having everyone share their pronouns makes it easier for someone who might be uncomfortable sharing their pronouns, and banding together to do it is good allyship.

likesmart

Tell them to change their policy. Forcing people to write their pronouns will out many gender non-conforming and LGBTQIA+ people and is against many well-known diversity policies. Forcing people to write pronouns is just peak performative wokeness. This is one of the few diversity policies that people of most political leanings agree is bad for various reasons.

likehelpfuluplifting

Holy shit - this is the worst idea I’ve ever heard. What on earth is wrong with y’all? Much less being INCREDIBLY inappropriate by the company it’s incredible that y’all support it. Buckle up for a lawsuit.

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Sounds like this is to help clients not make mistakes or feel awkward. Same for others not cisgendered.

In other words, it isn't about you. And if you're uncomfortable with the inclusiveness of your employers culture, you can leave and find a better fit.

likesmartupliftingfunny

No. Next question.

likefunny

My company doesn't require but encourages everyone to, so I have some experience here -

1. The policy helps LGBTQ ppl but also helps others, especially people with gender neutral names (Alex, Sam, etc) or uncommon non-english names (Ta-Nehisi) that don't imply a gender.

2. How does this hurt you enough that you need to complain about it?

likehelpful

Can I make a company like Dick's Last Resort and just be aweful and non PC because that is our company theme

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As a lesbian, it’s pretty fucking hilarious to hear a bunch of straight folks talk about how their rights are being encroached on.

Think about it this way.
If your very existence had been questioned most of your life, and your company made a small effort to validate your community ... imagine how amazing that would feel.

You can do something so small and make someone feel safer to be who they are.

Just do it.

likeupliftingsmartfunny

Maybe when all the “putting my gender in my signature is discrimination” people quit whatever agency, let’s just make our way there.

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I wouldn’t do it; very encroaching. Diversity isn’t supposed to include forcing your own beliefs & practices down everyone else’s throats. If others want to write in their gender pronouns, great. Forcing people to? Nope.

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likefunnysmart

G1, because you can make it whatever you want to?

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I wouldn’t do it

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What company is this so I can avoid? Lol

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PwC made it optional 🌈👍

The whole point is to normalize this so people in more vulnerable postitons don't have to be othered by being the only ones to list their pronouns.

Seems like a pretty costless way to make someone elses life a little less horrible.

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One other note: saying "I 100% support the LGBTQ community" then saying "I feel like I'm being indoctrinated" when you have to disclose your gender pronouns to create an inclusive environment for the T in the LGBTQ you allegedly "100% support," constitutes, in fact, less than 100% support.

No one who 100% supports the community feels "indoctrinated" by disclosing their pronouns (indoctrinated in what way? I thought you 100% support them?!?)

likesmart

Not seeing the issue won’t make it go away.

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It took you longer to write this post than it would have to change your signature.

likefunny

Pretty sure the issue was not the amount of time necessary

likefunny

I feel like we’re at a point where companies are indoctrinating employees to conform with a set of leftist ideals. I’m not sure if it’s appropriate for my employer to insert themselves into this conversations where myself and other employees have various opinions and upbringings. What if there’s a religiously devout employee who doesn’t agree? Now they’re uncomfortable.

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Yup, absolute r/iamverysmart fodder

likefunny

Just throw a "he, him" on their and keep it moving bro...i get why you are asking but is it such a big deal?

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I don’t understand how someone can be so bothered by putting in three extra words that DEFINE themselves in their email? You’re not saying “stupid human being” “piece of shit”, it’s literally three pronouns. If you get so bothered or uncomfortable by that, I feel like you need to reconsider what is and isn’t worth picking a battle over.

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Agree it is very few of us that need to use different pronouns to what would be expected.

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I think that's exactly why they are making it mandatory. Shifting from the current culture of "straight are normal and only those who are not should have to clarify/ come out" to "not making any assumptions about anyone." Now the only problem would be when people are still trying to work through their identity and don't necessarily want to out themselves (besides using they/their/them).

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Being straight has literally nothing to do with pronouns. Please, please just do some basic education. Research the difference between gender, sex, and sexuality. Very simple. Thank you. It would mean a lot to me.

smart

OP feel free to identify as a-hole if that makes it easier.

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