My GF and I don't have loans. But I have $100k and she has <$5k. (She has a nice job, recently she paid off edu loan with her money) We are getting married this year. So, is my money now our money?

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Op, resident lawyer here. It depends what state you live in. In NY, for example, your pre-marital assets and any inheritances are your own. Don't quote me on that, google it :-) (this is not legal advice)

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Btw, sweetest thing one of my friends said when he got married 9 years ago was, "I only have $20K in student loans, but am about to have $150K because of my wife's grad school debt, and she's going to be a teacher." 9 years later, they own an amazing place in BK Heights (their 2nd), have a little girl, he's a director at his co., she teaches full time and also teaches Zumba on weekends.

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Maybe you aren't ready to get married if this is in question

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YAaaaaasssss. The ladies they like the monies.

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Money? Your car, your side of the bed, your time with the boys all is now 'our's'

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If you ain't no punk, holla WE WANT PRENUP!

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To elaborate - you will make lots more money. 100K in long run is chump change.

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@PwC1 - Seriously? Gender isn't the point. I am in a similar situation with my boyfriend but I have more money than him. My money will be ours when we get married.

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You can have her sign a prenup, and share your credit scores. Have a conversation with her so she clarifies if she has other liabilities.

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Consider yourself lucky she is debt free. If the my vs. our money is a real question in your mind do her a favor and don't get married.

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'Our penis'

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No. Your money is her money and her money is her money.

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PWC1 is why gender inequality exists

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Yep. When you decide to get married you are committing your life to hers (and vice Versa). But do yourselves a favor and open up a couple of small savings accounts and put a small bit of money in each of them each paycheck so you can treat each other to surprises every now and then.

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Male here. She has no money because she paid off a loan so as to not burden YOU with the debt when you get married. If you are so concerned about your money, then maybe do her a favor and cancel the wedding because if you can't share your money, how can you expect her to share anything with you? Pre nups are a big slap in the face that basically say "let's get married but I may get tired of you so I want to make sure you get none of my money even though you've been willing to pay off your debts for me. Til death do us part, kinda sorta maybe"

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If you have a prenup though, it is one less thing to worry about. There is a lot of money in this profession relative to others. Once you are a few years into senior manager, odds are good you are in the top 1%. If she starts making more money, she is protected too. What if your parents or her parents have a lot of money? - if they die and leave it to her - should half of that be yours? If you have 300k in your 401k and she only has 50k - you are both leaving with 175k and that is if you are lucky. - it sounds great now but when people get divorced, reason goes out the window and the legal system and lawyers prey on this. Lawyers can easily walk away with a double digit % of what was "ours." - what if you come home on a Wednesday and shes with another guy? It happens more than you think when one party is gone over 100+ nights a year. We spend more than 1/3 of our life, away from our spouses and SO's. - then there is money. Money is the second leading cause of divorce.

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Haha. Yes.

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Sign a prenup. You want to make sure she isn't marrying you for your money. And for the record, I'm a woman. I make more than my husband does, and while we both enter the marriage free of non-collateralized debt, we both believe that what we earned before we got married should be kept separate. What we earn after we have kids will go into a joint pool.

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If sharing is hard now think about Five years from now. Reconsider what you are willing to provide. I say yes. You share and don't think twice about it.

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@EY death is inevitable, divorce doesn't have to be

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