My husband keeps threatening that he is going to leave me and my toddler soon some day . The reason he tells he doesn’t feel appreciated with me and he marrying me is mistake . No questions just vent

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Sometimes accomplishing things alone is easier than with a partner who is a hindrance. Life may be better without someone who manipulates you like this

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So incredibly true!

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I’m sorry. Try to fix things, but if you can’t or he does anyway.. you’ll be ok. My husband I split when my son was 16 months and we’ve done ok totally alone for 5+ years now 😄😄😃

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Well I wish my ex wanted nothing to do with me and my baby. I’m spending $$$$$ to keep him away. I’d spend $0 to keep him away if he wanted to stay away.

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I’m sorry. You don’t deserve to be threatened or manipulated like that.
Would you consider therapy (alone or couples)? Do you want to make the first move and leave him? Do you have family or friends who can help you make a safe decision here?

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Agree with Mck1. If your situation allows, are you able to leave him first?

Start preparing for a life without him. In case he actually does follow through. You were prepared. If he doesn't and you started looking forward to this new life you were planning without him, says something about the situation doesn't it. Obviously try to work things through. It sounds like ur hub has trouble communicating and is resorting to threats because that's what has worked for him in the past. Talk to each other and maybe try to work things out. Do the things he's complaining about. See if that even makes a difference or if he is just unhappy in general.

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Hi OP. I want to share my story to give you hope. My ex husband and I broke up 15 years ago when my daughter was 18 months due to a toxic relationship. It was hard for a short period but it passed. It is so much easier to be the best person you can be as a business woman, as a friend and most importantly the best mom you can be when you feel safe and valued. He has issues and is taking them out on you. There are good men out there who will make you a better person not a scared person.

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OP, If you are in a toxic relationship, you and your kid are better off without him. Therapy will definitely help you navigate things through. If family isnt supportive then may be reach out to friends

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I keep coming back to this post with concern for you, OP. Is there more you’re not telling us? Are his words and behavior emotional abuse?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/traversing-the-inner-terrain/201609/when-is-it-emotional-abuse

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I needed to read this. Thank you.

Tell him to not let the door hit him on the way out. Adios 🌈

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I would urge you to get counseling. I do think that your relationship can look somewhat different when you have young kids. I think that’s okay but you need to be on the same page. We have gone to therapy multiple times and it is so helpful!

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OP so sorry you are going through this. But let him go. If he is threatening you to leave now it will happen again and again and eventually he will leave anyway. You don’t want to walk on eggshells wondering when it will happen. Prepare and politely tell him not to let the door hit him in the ass on the way out. Yes you love him but he doesn’t love you like he should or he wouldn’t threaten to bail. Speaking from experience. Good luck.

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Op, why does he say that he doesn’t feel appreciated? Have you asked him why and tried to work on things - on both sides- so there is mutual respect and appreciation?

Sounds like he is immature and jealous that you probably focus a lot more on your kiddo than on him, which is natural for this stage of life. Does he help with the kid? Perhaps if he did, you would have a little more time for him? Does he show you appreciation?

Thanks everyone for the responses . I think you are all right that I should start planning for a life without him . May be we grew out of love . I try to keep telling myself this is the first year with kid hence the challenges but I am not sure whether we still have a chance .

To add more context we share most of the responsibilities equally but I think I missed all the early signs which has led here
- since being pregnant we haven’t been intimate(high risk pregnancy) and after birth he doesn’t feel comfortable as I am breastfeeding
- he had a major set back at work and he couldn’t change jobs as it is niche field
- he misses his family a lot (his brother and mom ) which is difficult for me to understand as he wanted to go away for 3 weeks leaving me and when my kid was 4 month old to another continent .i said no as it was just a visit and not an emergency and easily they could come to visit us .

I guess all these in the last few months destroyed our relationship and now we fight for everything with him saying he is leaving us for every fight .

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