Desi Consultants

My mom has been pushing my buttons recently. She keeps taking about these 2-3 extended family relatives of ours in the US who work in IBM, Wipro and some industrial goods company - all in suburbs with

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Yep, most people back home have no idea of the vastness of the US, and the differences in real estate prices etc., which is interesting since I think the same issues exist in India too. Last I checked, it was out of reach for most except the “1%” to buy “large houses” in cities like New Delhi, Bangalore etc. My (unsolicited) advice: We chose to make a life in the US. As long as you are happy, don’t bother with people who probably will never live/visit here, and are not interested in real answers. They are just playing their game of “keeping up with the Joneses”, or one-upmanship. If it bothers you too much, just let your parents know how much you make, and it will be public knowledge in record time ;-) Hopefully, that will give you some breathing room. Though, again, according to me, this is a slippery slope. You need to stop playing by their rules, because they cannot/will not change their mentality, you will have to change yours. (Why should they, they are happy living in one place and judging others by those standards).

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I guess so, thanks for the detailed note my friend! V helpful

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‘Biger houses’. These folks are 45+ and have mid level jobs but my mom & dad can’t stop gushing about their house, their cars and their dogs and their “blue chip” company jobs. She tells me today “I’m so proud you’re so fiscally conscious cause I didn’t buy a car”. It’s crazy, I make 3x of what these guys probably make but oh well I guess you can never win an Indian society demarcated norms of “success”. 🤦🏼‍♂️ #rantover

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Use the power of story telling to convey your Mom that you live in Mumbai and they live in Jhumritalayia

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Omg this is such an issue for us. Parents are thankfully understanding. But every single relative we speak to asks why we haven't bought a house whereas all our other relatives have bought big houses (they all live in places like Atlanta, I live in San Francisco). For me thankfully it's only relatives who ask so I brush them off with a joke. I can imagine it would be so much more painful to have a parent bring it up all the time.

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