{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "My partner and I are thinking of starting to try for a child later this year. We live in a HCOL in a 1 bedroom - 800 sq ft apartment. House prices and rent are skyrocketing and our rent controlled apartment seems pretty good to us right now. How bad is it if we just stay here with a newborn for a year or so? Is this a bad idea?", "post_id": "60f703a1323d3700222f5d14", "reply_count": 14, "vote_count": 3, "bowl_id": "5a0c9a1f61b01a001937c406", "bowl_name": "Working Moms" }

My partner and I are thinking of starting to try for a child later this year. We live in a HCOL in a 1 bedroom - 800 sq ft apartment. House prices and rent are skyrocketing and our rent controlled apartment seems pretty good to us right now. How bad is it if we just stay here with a newborn for a year or so? Is this a bad idea?

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Nah tbh our baby slept in a basinette in our room for the first six months. So we never used the guest bedroom anyway. Once he was old enough for his own crib the second room was helpful. But I have a friend whose baby sleeps in the living room and they do just fine.

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In my experience I wouldn’t do it. We did sleep training by month 5 (darn 4 month sleep regression) and not room sharing helps. Also babies come with a lot of stuff and it stressed me out to have clutter everywhere. We live in a HCOL city and moved to a 2 bedroom when baby was born. It’s so much easier with more space.

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Well I’d wait for you to get pregnant first because it could take awhile. Like what if it takes 1-3 years? I’d stay in the rent controlled apt.

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Totally agree. We stayed in our 1 bedroom NYC apartment whilst pregnant and our child stayed with us in the bedroom until he was 1 and we moved to a 2 bedroom. So many unknowns - you are way better off with a smaller space/lower cost to save $$ for when you really need it!

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We made it work for a year and a half. Baby slept in a pack and play in the beginning next to our bed and then a roller crib and we would role her out at night when we went to bed (essentially switching rooms). FYI NYC doorways are narrow so definitely take them into account when choosing a crib. Also, my husband found a sitter and we did date night once every 2 weeks and the sitter then cleaned our place when the baby went to sleep (which was at latest 8 pm). This totally helped us claw our adult time.

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It can be done. It wont easy, but not much with kids is. Make the decision that is best for your personal situation and try not to second guess. Too much of that comes with motherhood. Best wishes!

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Do you have space to decompress/work without having to look after the baby? Then go for it. More sq ft just helps with giving one partner a break while the other does the parenting. If you can create a nook like that, that's good enough. You might have to go Mary Kondo on your apartment to free up space for baby stuff. If you know you're going to move in a year, keep the additional stuff in a rented storage locker. If you can sell it, sell it. Pre baby and post baby homes are dramatically different from each other. The less clutter you have, the easier it will be on your mind.

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I'm the clutter bug (literally have carted elementary school craft projects) from clash to coast so will probably need to start decluttering now

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That’s more than enough room. We’re in NYC and have two kids in our 900 sq ft apartment. Our youngest is 1 and sleeps in our room. We will probably keep it this way for another two years. It may seem like a lot of stuff at first but it gets better once the baby outgrows the swing and bouncer.

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We stayed in our small townhouse for 3 years. Super easy to do for a year! Just be smart about accumulating baby stuff. Babies need about 5% of the “stuff” you might think 🙂 and we had one of those rolling / foldable cribs that was a lifesaver! Babyletto

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2.5 year old and 8 month old both still sleep in my room. I think it depends on 1) if you can be minimalistic and not turn your house into a daycare with a bunch of crap and 2) your philosophy on sleep training. I don’t do sleep training so them staying in my room works fine by me so I can quickly resettle anyone who wakes up in the night.

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We are in the same situation and are actively looking at houses now and giving ourselves enough time / runway to look for places without feeling a lot of pressure. Baby currently sleeps in bassinet in our room, but the lack of privacy is putting a big damper on relationship with SO. If we had to do it again, we would probably start looking earlier…our three month old has been to 20+ open houses and showings by now!

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Good luck! Thanks for this!

Not bad at all if your priority is to save.

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