{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "My partner is a founder of their own company and it’s growing very fast. Does anyone with significant others in the founder role have advice? I want to support as much as I can but they are so busy all the time I worry I’m asking too much...I don’t want to take away from the business growing, but also don’t want to feel like I’m responsible for everything house related, etc.", "post_id": "616eea205c1312002bdd9129", "reply_count": 8, "vote_count": 1, "bowl_id": "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d051", "bowl_name": "Consulting" }

My partner is a founder of their own company and it’s growing very fast. Does anyone with significant others in the founder role have advice? I want to support as much as I can but they are so busy all the time I worry I’m asking too much...I don’t want to take away from the business growing, but also don’t want to feel like I’m responsible for everything house related, etc.

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My SO is self employed and doing great in growing her business. I WFH in big tech. We had minor issues in the beginning but we both discussed every aspect and built a routine that works for us. You have to collectively agree on a system that works. Just continue having open conversations and be willing to lean in.

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My understanding is that growing a business like you’re describing requires great sacrifice from both the founder and their significant other. Totally understand your feelings of not wanting to be the default home keeper, however this may be the best way to support them in their endeavor like you described wanting to do. All in all, at least the business is successful so far! Not a bad problem to have. Best of luck!

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Thanks, I think this is exactly how I’m feeling. I’m actually no longer at BCG so my hours are more flexible for the time being. I feel like the most I can do to be helpful is be on top of meals/dog walks/cleaning/etc. I guess it works for now but worried about longer term when kids enter the picture. But day by day!

Given you're at BCG and your partner is doing well, you should both consider investing in outsourcing all home maintenance items. I started that while at BCG and by far the best use of our money. Lawn care - $60 biweekly House cleaning - $150 biweekly Food delivery - $250 weekly Etc. No need to sacrifice time at all

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This

First, have an open and honest discussion about your feelings and expectations for shared responsibility. Next, if needed discuss allocating funds and bringing in external support for the ‘home’ - do you have kids and need a nanny? do you need more frequent cleaning support? Can you not find time to take care of the lawn yourself now?

Also understand you recognizing this feeling is a first step and if things can mutually be figured out, counseling may be needed and that’s not a bad thing. It’s good to have a mediator around. Coming here is an ok step to gauge others positions but I wouldn’t take a ton of FB relationship advise from divorced consultants or those in loveless marriages.

My SO isn’t a founder but is a Big Law attorney and works 80+ hour weeks every week. I work 40 (at most), so I try to take the lead on most of the household responsibilities. Fortunately for now we’re DINKs in NYC so there’s not a ton of things to do (no lawn, no kids, etc.), but it works for me. Since you seem to work more than I do, I would recommend outsourcing as much household stuff as possible like VP1 suggests.

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