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Very sad and angry. I don’t know what to do. Everyone is in my space all the time and I am starting to self isolate myself (in order to deal with everything) but they think something is “wrong” with me. I cannot deal with this any longer and want to go somewhere. My family lives half the country away and I am so angry at myself for putting myself in this situation. What can I do/how can I cope?
I should have waited until you responded before I replied 😅.
YKnow your boyfriend and his mum sounds EXACTLY like my mom! The more stress and anxiety that builds up in her, the more she tries to “fix problems” and “show helpful concern” to all the people around her whom she is convinced are the ones that are actually stressed and anxious 😂 Anyway that’s why I decided to maintain my presently 6000+ mile separation away from her despite her concernedly telling me to come home lol (RIP to the rest of the family tho) BUT I DIGRESS
You’re gonna need to sit your bf and mom down, or atleast your bf down (assuming he has a spine and isn’t his mama’s bitch) and explain that you appreciate their concern but you’re fine and you just need quiet time and space for yourself to rationalize this unique situation, recalibrate your sense of normalcy and restructure how you manage your time and energy to maintain your sanity. TLDR- tell them to back the fuck off. You’re gonna likely come off as an asshole but that’s fine. You’re not their family member, you’re just a guest and you’re not out of options to leave if push comes to shove. Above all else, your peace of mind is important in this situation. Frankly this is also a good opportunity for your boyfriend to actually pay attention and learn about your personality just like you’re clearly being forced to see how he behaves in a challenging situation 😂
Seriously, capitalize on this situation to re-evaluate your life, your relationships, your goals and what you want for yourself and your family (even the future one).
Honestly go somewhere else. You need your space. Either short term rental or go stay with a close friend for a bit if possible
Pro
Go to your own place
Ugh that sounds so uncomfortable! How strong is the relationship with the mom? Can you be honest? I would try to figure out what you need (people to respect your space, your stuff, time apart, etc) and let them know. Maybe you tell them that being alone gives you more energy and peace. Or try taking walks by yourself?
Chief
Watch Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.
What is that about ? Also where Netflix, Hulu ?
Leave, you’re not a prisoner. Go to your place, rent on AirBnB or fly to your parents (wear gloves, hat, glasses, face cover like tight bandana if you don’t have a mask).
Chief
Why is your boyfriend’s mom with you two? If you are paying half the rent, don’t you have a say?
Ok- as someone who is going through a similar situation- I will say that yoga and meditation have REALLY been helping me. I understand that these things aren’t for everyone but I encourage you to try them and see if they work for you. I do 30 minute yoga videos on YouTube- check out “Yoga with Kassandra.” She also has quick 10-15 minute stretch videos.
If this isn’t your thing— try to find something that is. I have a friend who takes a bubble bath every night and finds it the most relaxing thing in the world to have that 30 mins to really be alone and pamper herself.
I know that this doesn’t address the root of the situation but I do hope it helps inspire you to find a way to cope with the situation. This is a weird and frustrating situation and living with family, especially other people’s family as an adult is weird and stressful. Just know that myself and tonsss of other people on here empathize with you. Best of luck and feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk to
❤️❤️
Thanks for your advice everyone. I have decided that I am moving out ASAP. Hopefully my move won’t be too bad, despite everything going on
Are you bored? Are they nagging you? Are they doing things that makes you wanna nag them? What is it that is frustrating you which if it stopped would make you feel better ?
Didn’t you post about this a few days ago? Or was that someone else with the “human capital management “ title ?
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