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How are you still functioning?? I’m doing better than this, but only because I’m worried I’ll actually walk into oncoming traffic if I don’t get 6+ hours of sleep and some regular exercise.
Now that we are WFH I am getting 7-8 hrs and it’s wonderful. Was hard to track past 6 a night when traveling
Classic Managing Director 🤣
Partners at most firms seem happier.
‘Not even proud’- what would there be to be proud of? Seems like there are several days where you just didn’t sleep.
I would suggest you speak to your management before you break down, make a mistake.... have a heart attach. I genuinely don’t believe you can be impactful if you’re this tired.
Good luck!
Mentor
I remember being able to do all nighters in my 20s, and function on a consistent 4 hours of sleep if I had to.
Now in my late 30s I’m pretty sure I’d be dead if I did that for a month.
You need to get more sleep. Like, you’re going to die if you don’t. Please take care of yourself.
Alright, fellow sharks! This is all so helpful. I took a few hours off this evening to absorb all the comments, went on a long drive, had a nice dinner chat with the wife.
Mine is a practice I was hired to build and it is now both, stable and profitable - gave it enough, but no more.
I think I’m set to turn the corner - and likely move back to mainstream shop (for the exact reasons MD5 mentioned). Working with a profile writer anyways, reactivating the network, and hopefully will hit the market in a couple weeks.
Subject Expert
A1, my point was more — if OP gave that much of themselves to build something valuable, it feels like they should ask the firm to take care of them in return
Dude... you need to stop killing yourself. THIS IS NOT WORTH IT!
This is not the battle to be a martyr on. I’m sure you know it already, but you have to take better care of yourself. If you were no more on your project, client, firm etc, they would slot in a replacement without batting an eye. You can do better, and should do better. You owe it to yourself. I’m rooting for you to do the right thing! 🤗
Thanks team! Helpful perspectives. This is my 8th month I guess with this stat and I’m nearly crashing physically and mentally. Very close to calling it quits if I can’t get more support any soon.
It hurts to not be able spend quality time with the wife. What also hit hard is a close friend called over the weekend, and broke down, he was on the verge of harming himself. I said you should have called me before, and he is like ‘You’re so busy!’
Indeed, had a chat with SLT a few times. Extreme demand for my service line since last year and severe lack of in house talent is crushing me. Starting to say no to almost everything new now but the backlog is still scary.
I’m in NA with a global role. Avoiding naming the firm because it’s genuinely not just about the firm, rather the ways market has turned. Plus the firm is up for transaction so we can’t turn down work or suddenly hire like crazy (which is where the struggle is).
Not in hero mode. I know this is broken and needs fixing. My ask was around how do folks who may have been in similar situation coped until the ship turned around. This discussion has been helpful.
With you on family and friends - that’s what matters.
Been there, made myself sick. Unfortunately, for many of us, it’s getting sick that makes us wake up and realize we need to make changes. Making peace with saying no to things helped. As hard as it is turning things down, being a type A overachiever, I’ve realized it’s not sustainable as I got older (40 now, for reference). If nothing else, I remind myself that my kids need me and that motivates me to be selective in what I take on so that I can actually sleep for more than 4 hours a night. You can do it - find something that will motivate you to stay healthy for - for me it was my kids. Good luck!
Definitely not something to be proud of. Assuming this is from overwork, it’s time to drop something! Set priorities, talk to your management etc.
Mentor
Ouch. I am usually around 7 hours myself.
Read the book ‘Why we sleep’ - it will open your eyes to how critical sleep is to every aspect of your body and mind.
Agreed. I read Why We Sleep over the Christmas break and I have fundamentally changed my entire approach to sleep. I’m now consistently getting 7-8 hours and so much more productive at work. For me, it was just drawing a line in the sand based on personal health and wellness and not crossing it unless the project was literally on fire which is exceedingly rare.
Yikes... rethink this immediately! So bad for your health
Best of luck OP!
Coach
I constantly turn down new stuff, decline meetings, or just don’t even show up if nobody bothered to tell me why I needed to be there.
I focus on the core activities needed to run my practice, and anything outside of that is noise. Accenture loves their “plus 1s”. I don’t do any of those anymore. If I hit my personal targets and practice targets, then I’m happy with that. Don’t get me wrong I still have a brutal stretch here and there - just recently I had a string of days where I was going 6a-10p because a big project was going off the rails. Now I’m back to a normal rhythm.
Honestly I think you just need to reach a mindset of “if this isn’t enough, then go ahead and fire me”. And of course they won’t if you have an in demand skill.
Mentor
Ummm... where the hell do you work
Clearly somewhere I won’t be for very long 😀
It’s a boutique.
Did this a few years ago and literally made myself sick. Also a boutique firm...I had a horrid head to toe psoriasis flair after never having had anything like that my entire life. I was miserable for a solid 6 months and looked like I had the plague. Only thing that worked was more sleep and less work so I moved to a bigger firm with a larger bench and the cash flow to turndown projects that wouldn’t be effectively staffed. And I’m performing stronger and more consistently with more sleep even 3 years older.
Something doesn’t quite compute for me here. If you’ve been killing yourself to create this practice, and now it’s stable and profitable, why can’t you get your hours under control within the current role?
Those hours make it sound to me more like the practice is still in a precarious shape. Maybe having lots of sales success, but at risk of mucking up delivery and having major setbacks in the near future, ie not stable.
If your firm could now keep this business stable without you, shouldn’t they be able to keep it stable with you not killing yourself?
Not saying that you owe the firm more. But I’m sensing cognitive dissonance. Do you find it easier to leave, than to say no when necessary, or ask for what you need?
This may also be a case where a good executive coach would be valuable. It’s a big set of issues you’re dealing with, and the depth of perspectives you can get from us on this app is probably not going to do it justice.
Org, Infra, Op model, and pipeline are set. Staffing levels are still inadequate - so its a throughput issue. I could stay and life will be okay in the 6 to 8 months with the hiring ramp-up, I’m not sure if I have energies or drive left to plow it through three more quarters.
Coach
I think that’s a different way of saying the same thing OW2 said above; “infra and op model in place” sounds like you’ve consulted yourself into believing you built the foundation for success. Without the team to deliver however, your pipeline and ultimately sales/delivery, won’t be worth much.
I think we all probably create demand ahead of our ability to staff to some extent, but it sounds like you may have overextended on that front.
Punchline is still the same tho - no job is worth killing yourself for.