Not mom or consulting related — looking for advice. Mom with husband + 2 school age kids. Travel 2-3 days / wk max. We’ve had a dog for about a year now. I love the pup a ton, she makes me happy...

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I’d rehome your husband! I’m so sorry you are going through this. Getting the dog was a mutual decision? If you feel the dog is not getting the love, attention, exercise that is needed then I think I would look to rehome (assuming your husband isn’t going to change). On a different note, could there be something going on with your husband or does he just hate the dog?

likesmart

Mutual yes. And that’s what makes it harder — feel like it was a bait and switch on me.

She’s getting what she needs most of the time to be fair — she gets the ball thrown a few times per day, goes to daycare, occasional hike or walk. It’s more who he’s become ... and how that stresses me out. A family is supposed to enjoy their pet — laugh at the silly things they do, walk it together, etc ....this was supposed to be a good thing, not something for us to fight over.

I am just frustrated because I feel / know right thing to do is rehome her ... but then I feel like he’s taking from me something I love and enjoy

I’d rehome the dog as long as you have a place in mind and know the quality of life would be better. Also, have you figured out why hubs has these strong feelings? My husband had never had a dog but we got one together (small and easy to keep very clean) and he LOVES him and dotes on him. Also baths him at least once a week and cleans feet/privates every time he comes in from outside. It sounds like maybe the type of dog is the issue? Plenty of people don’t like pets so I hope no one has any sociopath comments for you

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Omg - I’ve been in a similar situation and wondering the same. My husband doesn’t ask to crate the dog but we do have baby gates to contain it in certain areas and he doesn’t like it sitting by us but he doesn’t care if the kids do stuff with the dog.

Honestly the thing about not letting the kids pet or lay with the dog would bother me most because a big part of having a pet as a kid is learning to take care of it and having that big fluffy cuddlebug to hug and pet (still have fond memories of my childhood dog). Our kids read to the dog, play outside with it, and just hang out with it.

I get maybe he’s not a ‘dog person’ but how does he explain not allowing the kids to enjoy the dog? Is he willing to say that while he doesn’t care for the dog, the kids can make up their own mind and play/cuddle with it? If not, I think your resentment and guilt are probably just going to grow and it may be better for your family and the dog to either address or rehome the pup.

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I am sorry. I know I feel like, am I giving this dog it’s best life when I feel limited by my work/travel and etc. I don’t know the right answer for you and your family but I’m sorry it’s hard. I know how much a dog can bring to a family and I know the guilt I’ve had - sounds like we may have those things in common. Anyways I’m just sorry about your situation and that you have to make a tough choice.

I’d rehome the dog. I feel sorry for the dog and thinks he deserves a home where everyone loves him.
Also feeling sorry for you and the kids :(

I guess your husband realized he’s not a dog person or he’s actually scared of the dog and wants to protect the kids hence not letting them play/pet the dog?

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Yes - thinks she will bite them or push them down. She also had hookworm as a young pup so now even though long gone - he’s convinced she will infect our children .... lots going on here clearly 😢

I agree. As someone who loves our dog to pieces (husband and toddler son also love her) this breaks my beard. It’s not fair for your dog that she gets yelled at and isn’t allowed to play with the kids. She deserves to be happy. I’m so sorry you’re going through this!

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But my husband hates her. Won’t take any responsibility. Won’t let her come near him. Makes me crate her at night and when we are out and when people are over and Keeps her in crate mostly when I am not home. Constantly yells at her.

He Won’t let our kids pet her or hug her and god forbid if the ever kissed her or lay down with her ... it causes me so much stress and makes me look at my husband differently (didn’t know he was like this until we got her) (have known him for 15 years, but we’ve never had a pet)

So I am torn — do I try to rehome her (know a family that has kids, acerage and many dogs before that are interested) or do I keep her and realize he’s just going to be like this. Honestly just looking for some opinions ...

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