Do you have an HR department? This feels not legal.

This is so inappropriate, it makes me wildly uncomfortable. What's next, a doctor's note?

...the fuck. First, you should never negotiate a raise based in external factors like increased rent. Ask for a raise because you are not paid the wages that are market for your position, and because you can demonstrate that you have taken on additional responsibilities since you've started. You didn't go about this in the right way, but your boss is also asking for way more than is reasonable.

OP, I'm a little confused. This is a startup but they have an employee who's been there for 20 years? Anyway, I'd not go around talking to coworkers about this because you're too young and inexperienced/have had too short of a tenure there to know who to trust. And for the remainder of your career, avoid talking trash about bosses to others, sit back and observe when they do, feel free to nod along or throw in a "I hear you", but do not actually collude in such talk. You never know how it may come back to bite you and it's very unprofessional and immature. Learn to stay cool and collected, unlike your current boss. Don't give people reason to gossip about you. You don't know who else this person you confided in is now talking to. I don't mean you should be paranoid! But do take care in how you behave professionally. Get out of there as soon as you can, as stated.

GET EVERYTHING IN WRITING. I would send him an email recapping that conversation you just had with him plus what Account Director1 just said. If they do "fire" you because you don't do it his way you have proof. Forward all these emails to your personal email, you'll likely lose access to your work email if things go south.

Red flag. 🙅🏻🙅🏻🙅🏻 I've received several raises and promotions throughout my career, in several states. I've had to provide exactly nothing. Even if your boss tries to pull this as a cost of living thing, businesses calculate that on their own with a standard percentage increase across the board, not based off of individual finances. Have a separate chat with HR. And in all honesty, start interviewing elsewhere. You don't want to work for a boss or a company like that.

OP, as others said. This was wrong from the beginning with the way you approached it and the fact you didn't press to continue the conversation so you can explain about your workload. A few different things to note first: - You can't simply expect that a startup pays the going rate for your ZIP. It's very much the opposite often. Startups pay less cash and offer other benefits instead to compensate people like stock options for future, wfh plugins, blah blah - It's totally inappropriate for him to ask you for your lease. But as a side note, please know sending an unsigned by both parties agreement is not a legal agreement yet and would not serve as evidence of anything, if the situation was such that it was appropriate to provide it. My advice is this: The situation it's fucked and your boss is now pissed and had no intention of helping you. Say that you have reconsidered the whole raise based on rent situation as you've actually realized it's not business relevant but you're overburdened with workload and please very specifically outline with bullets what that entails. Make sure you have at least 3-4 solid points to make this argument. Expect nothing to change, but do ask if how he can address your workload. Meanwhile, start looking ASAP! You're not going to get a raise at this place, nor a good career as the relationship is damaged. You can just collect yourself and ride it out until you land your next gig. When you go to interviews and they ask you why you're leaving, say it turned out that unfortunately there are limited opportunities there for your growth and you're looking into more established agencies where you can learn faster and get more varied experience. Then stop talking, that's an answer enough. Good luck! Let us know if more questions.

Get everything in writing to recap what happened. Leaving before a year won't look terrible. It's worth it if your sanity is on the line.

Yes, totally agree with everyone. This feels so invasive and creepy. Never heard of anything like this. The only thing you should ever provide in a convo about a raise is data/proof about your performance.

Unless your company is offering to cover your rent or something, it is completely unacceptable for him to ask for your lease. Seems like he's stalling and grabbing at straws. At a small agency I was at, I had a similar sitch where my manager said "I'll take care of it," I heard nothing, then when I followed up he said "Oh yeah, we can't afford that financially right now, please understand." I dealt with that twice as a junior before I decided to leave and found out on my last day they were paying my male coworker almost double my salary 😡

find another job. that is crazy.

Bring this to HR

I sent him an email stating that there is no clause about signatures in the agreement I signed. Simply that I would get a raise upon his receipt of the lease. I don't think it's appropriate that he has this 11 page document about my housing. But I'm desperate to get my first year in here and get out. I just graduated school, and clearly I made a mistake in taking this job. But I'm aware that leaving before a year wouldn't look good on my resume. There is no HR at my job as I work for a very small company, basically a start up since they seemed to tank at the time of the recession from what I've gathered

Get a new job. Don't worry about less than a year: if you're good, nobody will care.

He's working from home today and called me. Spent 17 minutes telling me how angry he is that I dared to ask questions. Basically told me I need to do it his way or I'm fired. Told me there would be plenty of people who would take my salary. ($37k... in New York 🙄) this raise isn't even much. It wouldn't put me at the market rate. But I was trying to believe he was being honest with me when we said he could afford that when I started. We obviously can afford that now that ok what our invoices look like. I'm looking into local governments counseling in the area.

Thanks AD 1, yeah I realized quickly that I went about a raise wrong. But he's not easy to speak to, he even cuts off our clients in meetings. I spoke to my coworker about it, as he has vented to me about our boss before. He has been here farrrrr longer than I ever plan to stay. But his advice was to put my feelers out there and try to look for something better, he'd rather not train a new me. But it was fucked up that he threatened to fire me. He said he's known to fly off the handle about minuscule things, and this would be an example of it. He said he put him in his place when he was in my position and told him not to speak to him that way otherwise he'd leave the company. He's been here 20 years without an issue. So he said it was good that I handled it how I did, and to even be more aggressive is fine in this company. Bottom line is I'll be in touch with recruiters. And see how the next few weeks go. I won't leave without finding something better first, but after the way I was treated on the phone I've got a foot out the door.

I also printed any emails he sent regarding the issue, as one respondent said it may be a good idea to get local gov involved. So that's a consideration as well.

^^Too many typos to fix, but you get the main point!

I think you should try talking to a lawyer or looking into w/e resources your local gov has regarding company employee relations. This definitely does not seem legal at all.

AD 1; I just compare this to a start up because there are so few employees. The company was much larger and from what I understand they lost a lot in the recession. (It's kind of worrisome that they haven't regained much in the years since.) No I totally get you! No trash talking on my end. I just listened to what he had to say about it. I didn't join in and also call him an asshole lol. Sent out a few applications last night, hoping to just put this behind me. It's not worth working for someone who makes the work environment hostile. Worse comes to worst I stay until January (when supposedly I will get a performance based raise). But I wouldn't stay any longer than that. Just depends on the opportunities I see between now and January. Thanks everyone who's answered so far. :)