Not very physically attracted by my bf. We've been together for over 3 years. I feel he is like my best friend but not my partner. He seems to feel the same. I'm quite confused about our relationship.

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It might be a good thing. Best friends make good reliable partners. There's other things you can do about what goes on in the bedroom.

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Could you provide some examples plz? Neither of us is very experienced in this 😅

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Leave now to try and preserve a friendship. Been there, done that and was far too young (30s) to give up passion for safety/comfort. You CAN have both!

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SC2 how long have you been together? Have you communicated this with him? I imagine it’s an extremely tough message to deliver.

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Ay yi yi...

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?

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Break up. Especially since you’ve clearly spoken to know that he feels the same way. Why settle for complacency? I’d die if I found out my partner was only with me out of familiarity.

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Attraction + she doesn’t view him as a partner + he doesn’t view her as a partner. I agree that friendship is important, but you need to be attracted to your spouse. Who wouldn’t want to be attracted to the person they choose to spend life with?

Looks aren’t everything, but let’s not downplay the desire factor in relationships.

Also, you can have both a solid friendship + attraction.

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I would say you should both try to put effort in to be more romantic and both focus on working out and getting back to the point of being attracted to each other and if that’s not something either of you want to do, break up because you don’t care enough anymore

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I think being young and being in your first long term relationship do explain a bit of this. I don’t think every relationship needs to have movie-type romance and I think it’s a great thing to be silly with each other. However, if you feel like something is missing in your relationship, it probably is. You deserve to feel satisfied romantically and sexually in your relationship. Sometimes you can’t find the missing piece or create a spark that isn’t there- and that’s okay!

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same situation with my ex. we were best friends first and I wasn't initially attracted, but the attraction did grow very strong when we started dating. then it started to fizzle, thinking about other guys in the last half of our relationship and eventually decided to end things. don't regret it but I miss his presence (in the most platonic way, just hanging out, etc) a lot

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We're you ever physically attracted to him?

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OP are you Asian? And how old are you? Just curious

Following because same

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I’m in a similar spot, except it’s only been a few months. I’m so confused

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Been there. I could only last 6-8 months after I lost my attraction to him and that wasn’t fun. It made both of our sex lives hell and that spilled onto other things. I couldn’t end it, he was my best friend and I loved him. Then one day I kissed someone else, called him up and tried to end it. He didnt want to, he wanted take me back and try to forgive me. Guilty, I went with it. But when it came to having sex with him again, I couldn’t do it without forcing myself so I just walked away. I ended up breaking his heart twice.

Don’t be me.

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Side note - we remained close friends and sexted a bit for months after that. So it wasnt a cold turkey transition which would have been hard.

Same

D2 reach out if you want to chat/commiserate

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