{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "I’m planning to visit my parents after 2 years. Last time I went home, it was with a fiancé - that fell apart during COVID. I feel like a failure going home and can’t believe this is causing me so much anxiety. I want to feel happy about meeting my parents and friends after so long but I’m so not in the zone to deal with comments and questions about him. Anyone dealt with this before? Any advice is appreciated!", "post_id": "6169af99a8760600327d752b", "reply_count": 5, "vote_count": 2, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

I’m planning to visit my parents after 2 years. Last time I went home, it was with a fiancé - that fell apart during COVID. I feel like a failure going home and can’t believe this is causing me so much anxiety. I want to feel happy about meeting my parents and friends after so long but I’m so not in the zone to deal with comments and questions about him. Anyone dealt with this before? Any advice is appreciated!

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Set clear boundaries during the first few comments you do not wish to talk about that subject. Also this is a journey and not a simple thing to do but instead of feeling like a failure , be proud of yourself for not going through something that wasn’t right for you! Think of it as you saved yourself . ❤️

likeuplifting

This. Avoiding a bad marriage is a success, not a failure. Set boundaries and if they aren’t respected, don’t visit again. they’ll learn very quickly lol.

likeupliftingsmart

Not the same situation, but can relate to feeling anxious when visiting my parents. I come from a South Asian family where my parents can’t accept my single lifestyle. I’m in my mid-30s and marriage is brought up every time I visit. I cope with it by being high enough where I can function and they can’t tell, it helps to calm my anxiety.

likehelpful

Not the same situation Op but I feel you. I’m going home after almost 3 years and they’re going to make me feel like I’m a loser because I’m still single. Now that I’m older, they’ll keep asking me what my plans are, when I’m planning to become ‘serious’ in life and when I’ll settle down. I really dread it. Plus my birthday is coming up. That’s the worst because I don’t want people calling me and asking me when I’m getting married lol. I feel you it’s very annoying

likehelpful

I struggle with that too but being with them stresses me more and makes me want to cry . So delaying my visit and will keep it for a short duration so that I just need to survive by an end date . I am very very happy overall but thinking abt going home is making me anxious . I keep telling them that getting married will not be the reason for my happiness overall but they don’t understand

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