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if she is earning too, then she can support else it can be very difficult on one person's salary
You all need to sit down and have an honest conversation about your home, your relationship, and your finances. Try to approach it from the point of view of being housemates/roommates — more than half your financial issues will go away if you start with trying to be a good housemate/roommate to start, and go from there.
What if she had no siblings? Isn't it our responsibility to care for our parents instead of thinking that her other siblings should care for them? Would you not support your parents if you have/had your siblings who doesnt care for your parents? Never ever have a second thought that others should care for the parents. If your siblings help, well and good. If not, you should support them.
If it's basic support then that's fine.. If it's extravagant and lavish then probably she needs to think about it.
Be happy about it, it would set a good example for your lkids too.. You have got a great person as your spouse, try appreciating her :)
The society norm is that a man can financially support his parents ignoring if he has sibling or not but a woman doing the same is questioned.
Yes, she has every right to support her parents and in the long term as well I don't see an issue.
Of course we plan our future finance with both of our salaries combined we do consider supporting our parents as well a priority.
When she has sisters and earning money, can one expect their sisters also support their parents? Give first one some relaxation
Rising Star
Is she not contributing to family expenses or is she doing both? My wife contributes to all our household expenses and I don't care what she is doing with the rest of her money
Just 20-30%? Why are you having problem then!! Your sole point seem to be, out of her siblings why should only she help; which is frankly a very moronic point. That is none of your business. That is her family’s dynamics, let it be. If she is sending only 20-30%, that means she is saving 70%, which can come to your use, or your children’s in future. And if your concern is why she doesn’t contribute to monthly expense, you can simply talk to her about it. You can also suggest to her to open a joint account with you, where both of of you will transfer 30% of you earning. But having problem because she is spending just 20-30% of her monthly earning on her parents, is bizarre and unbelievable! She is earning, she can spend 30% wherever she wish, and the same applies to you too- You too can spend 30% anywhere you wish.
Even if she is not earning And her parents are dependent on her. A husband/wife has to support financially emotionally in every way possible dude.
I know from where this question is coming from. Things are changing, I am not married but I will do whatever is possible to support my family and extended one. It’s easier said then done but it’s not my money your money anymore, it’s about the people you love and care for.
God forbid if there's no emergency or financial crisis, it's a shame for those parents/families who rightfully accept this type of help that too regularly and so easily.
If they were so helpless and dependent on their daughter's earnings why don't they let her stay with them unmarried for another decade till they become self sufficient.
If for instance you lose your job tomorrow will your in-laws bear your expenses, pay your bills and feed your family?
@consultant 2 seems to be with the mentality who wants a working wife but she should do all household chores, take care of kids, his family but not her family. Also should handover her salary to him lol.. Grow UP please
I feel it's a silly question and hypocritical question.Wife has equal rights to support her parents as a husband.I will feel bad if my wife prevents me from supporting my parents .
I am surprised this is even a question. All children should absolutely take responsibility for their parents irrespective of marital status.
This comment section is making me not wanting to get married.
What is wrong with men these days? Stop being so nosybody. As long as she is able to support you just shut up & move on.
Chief
See these family dynamics play in every family. There are men who support their parents and women do not like it. There are women who support her parents and men do not like it. I would say talk and plan financials and you keep something aside and she can keep something aside for your family. Remaining let her do what she wants.
Her money her choice
OP ne in laws ko apni family samjhs nhin abhi tak, expecting wife to get detached from her family.20 30 % ki chinta hai..70 % jo kama k de rahi uski kjushi nhin
To the OP, do you help your parents financially? Does your wife complain about that? If no, then its totally fine. If yes, you should stop staying with your parents, stop helping them financially. Look your in-laws have brought up an independent woman who has 100% right on her money. And from the conversation I get she contributes in the core family(she, your children and you) too. So, stop nagging.
@Team Lead 1 You must be not supporting your family.
Think like you are only earning member & plan accordingly!
Ask someone whose wife doesn't earn. You would know
Rising Star
All the people commenting didn't even understand what OP is trying to say. He also has his parents to take care of. It doesn't make sense if he is spending all his income in family expenses. His wife is not sending entire money to parents so why shouldn't she contribute if she is capable?
Man, would you mind asking the same question to yourself? Should you support your parents in the long term when you'll have family and kids ?
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