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have been in your spot gosh its always a challenge.
Definitely stop escalating to the lead partner. If you can find an ally in one of the others, frame it as,
"How can I be successful in supporting you/this initiative" (don't even bring up the other person)
If you talk to the other SM again, ask her what she is comfortable handling. Understand her style to see if you can get some path forward.
Ask her opinion on calls and then sit with the silence. I can be impatient and had to learn to be comfortable with people taking time to respond. It's awkward but you get used to it.
I’ve converted one of the partners but I feel like the partner isn’t as vocal as I am. I agree with you - I need to learn to be comfortable with awkward silences. It’s just hard. Imagine on a call you go ‘hey xyz do you want to take this up maybe’ and complete silence from everyone. Then, the one time that xyz takes something on, three weeks later when you know nothing’s done you go ‘hey did that get done..?’.. long pause and one word ‘yes’. Bs it got done. Nothing got done. Aaaa. Haha maybe I just need to let it go
Does she have something else going on her life? Is she a processor or an introvert, where she needs time to think and process the situation vs spitballing ideas in real time in a group of people? Does she have a different work style than you? Is she overwhelmed by another project or some other work that you aren’t aware of?
Point is, have you really gotten to know your colleague so that you can truly partner and leverage each other’s strengths and talents? There may be more going on here than you are aware of.
Thanks, I appreciate the insight. It’s the right thing to do and I can run away from it with a facade of frustration or take it head on and figure this out. The former is always a back up option if the latter doesn’t work! Thanks again!
Baggage just let it be, focus on your success dead weight will eventually get noticed
I am the same way; if you have pull from leadership and if it’s worth blowing it over go and throw her under the bus
Chief
Assign her work on calls with the partners. It will start to become clearer to them either when she doesn't deliver or refuses to sign up repeatedly.
Chief
Yeah best to not let it get to client level, but not cleaning them up before reviews with partners is appropriate.
D1, P1 are all giving you BS advice. The whole consulting world is rigged. Performance or no performance, you don't have a choice but to be nice to her. Remember, you will be called out as not having leadership skills for pointing out their sloppiness or quietness. Has happened to all my top performing ex-colleagues.
To the extent that, you push a review in the system. They will over power that review, bury it and say something positive and you will look like the person who complains all the time or has personality issues when all you were doing is your JOB
Either you start hobnobbing or you simply look for another gig. The leadership will go to any extent to cover their asses and failures and praise each other in calls and put a facade and back stab you in all leadership calls. Everyone is in this to pay their bills and mortgage and take care of their family and I get that.
But what is wrong with the picture is to what lengths they will go to safeguard their interests and bring you down mentally and professionally is what you need to watch out for. It is happening right now to some of my former colleagues in Big 4. Hardwork, talent, ethics, values, everything has been compromised. Only deceit, backstabbing, hobnobbing, favoritism, nepotism has prevailed. Good Luck!
IF YOU ARE NOT A PART OF THE INNER CIRCLE, YOU ARE A NOBODY IN THE FIRM
Infosys
Oh and I also tried a 1:1 w her. She was quiet and unreceptive the whole time and it ended up being a ramble from me cause she’s just dint speak. Just listening and yessed along once every 3 mins