One of my Kinders refuses to go to the bathroom at school. I have a bathroom in my classroom and there is a bathroom at the playground. He will hold it until he wets his pants. I have tried everything that I know of to get him to use the bathroom. I’ve talked with my principal and the school counselors and have tried everything that they have come up with. Nothing is working. Mom and dad both say that this is the only place he does this at. He will go just fine outside of school. Suggestions?

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He needs to flush. But can he wear noise canceling headphones? Or go with a buddy to make him brave? Ultimately, we were able to find a toilet that my student would flush and she had special permission to go to that toilet instead of the kinder toilets.

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Do you have automatically flushing toilets? I had a student once that really hated the automatics because he was never ready for it, and they are loud. I would give him a post-it to cover the sensor when he used the restroom, then when he was done, either I or another student would go throw away the post-it. Just a thought!

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hmmmm is he used to someone (mom or dad) always going with him???? that would be weird, butI wonder what scares him. Can you ask him or talk to him to relieve any fears? Maybe get a counselor involved?

I have asked him if he’s afraid or if he’s scared and he just shuts down and becomes like a brick wall. He doesn’t talk and he gets tears in his eyes. Mom and dad have also tried to talk to him and he won’t tell them either mom seems to think that maybe he just doesn’t know how to say what he is feeling.. We do have the school counselors involved and even the things that they have tried are not working.

I sure don't know. Doesn't sound like the issue I had in kindergarten. I was scared to ASK to go to the restroom (was scared the teacher would tell me no since other kiddies abused it and would get told no sometimes) and would end up wetting my pants. 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️ Seems like he would at least go if everyone else is going. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Nice to know I wasn't alone!!!

Is it that he is afraid or afraid of missing out? My daughter would do the same because she was so afraid that she might miss...I wonder if there is a way to talk him through that or allow him to have a friend that tells him what happens when he goes to the bathroom and who he tells what happens to, when they go to the bathroom. I’m sure you’ve thought of this but is there a bathroom in the main office?

We haven’t tried having him go to the main office to use the bathroom. I have one in my classroom. It’s a single toilet and he can lock the door and he knows that. I think maybe will try to see if he’ll go in the main office bathroom. Thank you!

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Have you taught him explicitly how to lock and unlock the door to the stall? Maybe it’s a privacy issue?

I had a student before who was so opposed to public bathrooms. I talked to his parents about it and asked them to help me by encouraging him to use public restrooms when they were out and about rather than going home to go to the bathroom as they had been.

I started sending him to the nurse’s office to use the (single toilet) restroom there, and then transitioned him to the common restroom.

That’s a good idea.....I will review bathroom procedures with him & see if that helps. Thank you!

Maybe the flush of the school/public toilet, since they are louder than a home one?
My son would do the same, because the school restrooms were nasty. He said their was always pee in the floor.😳

Ugh! I wouldn’t want to go in those bathrooms either! Our bathroom in class is a singular toilet and is usually kept really clean. Maybe it is the flush. I’ll see what I can do to help him with that. Thank you!

I had a student like this. The loudness of the flush was definitely a problem. It was a problem all year. This child also refused anything not red. Not overtly autistic but certainly made us all wonder.

Oh that’s interesting. Maybe it is the flash. I will tell him that he does not have to flush. Hopefully that will help. Thank you!

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