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One can only hope...
Is it over?
Enthusiast
Additional Posts in Consulting
Favorite industry to consult in?
Chief
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Comey got Kiffined
The Westin in Times Square is actually so nice
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I always tell my kids that I learn how people do their jobs and then figure out a way to do it better. I help people get more work done.
Then I wonder if that’s actually true
“I’m a therapist for executives of companies"
Explain it how a 5 year old can get it
I move boxes on slides
^looks like you need some consulting
Despair.com
“I’m a doctor for companies"
I’m in healthcare, so I say that I help hospitals fix problems so that doctors and nurses can take care of their patients better. Extremely simplistic, but you get the gist
Let’s not kid ourselves. We are hired help for large companies when they need extra bodies for a problem or a project. Unless you are specialized, you are a glorified project manager.
Like a fireman, but for business dumpster fires...
Ask the kids in the classroom if anybody has a daddy that’s a CEO or CIO of a company. If even a single kid raises a hand, point at that kid and say “I do your daddy’s job for him, and he gives me some of his money."
Just be honest!
"Instead of starting my own business and taking risks/adventures/ownership of my future, I sell solutions to technical issues for large American Corporations. Often, this just means I take a job that was in America and put it into India. My firm is incorporated outside of the United States to avoid taxes, and I underpay the foreign staff who work for me in America because I know their visa requires them to be employeed regardless of the amount of money they make. I'm really just adding to the drain of American society, specifically.. your future. On a daily basis, I use other people's ideas and act like they are mine."
I help them do their homework.
I tell generally kids I create computer programs that predict wars. I tell adults I’m Nate Silver except I predict wars instead of elections.
I work with companies to help solve their problems
This explains consulting pretty accurately
My daughter loves coloring so I told her I make squares and arrows and triangles and make them different pretty colors. Sometimes I add some letters too. When she is older I will tell her I also use chevrons
<insert joke about hourly rate, hotel rooms, and pleasing someone>
Anyone who says “doctors for companies” should be taken out back. We are nowhere near that important nor that valuable 🤦🏼♀️
But, almost all consulting jobs can be explained with the formula “I do X for Y so that they can do Z better.”
You’re a traveling business doctor