Potentially hot take: it rubs me the wrong way that half Asian- half white people are acting like they’re full Asian and experience similar trauma as the rest of us when they are “white-passing.” The trauma isn’t the same? I am probably coming off as mean spirited because I’m sure they also struggle with their identities being in both worlds. Hope this doesn’t come off as too harsh. Just frustrated with everything going on

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You are mean spirited. No half Asians are pretending to experience life in the same way as mono-racial Asians. However I challenge you to look inward on the difficulties and traumas you may be inflicting on your mixed Asian brothers and sisters. This type of post is exactly why mixed Asians feel like they can’t count on either community to have their back.

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I also challenge you to think about your future kids - so many Asians date white people (which is totally ok and normal) but would you shut your kid out of Asian culture, or try and tell them that their experiences with race are invalid? I doubt it.

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Being half comes with similar challenges and also other challenges. My half friends say people assume they’re their white fathers young girlfriend, they have even more of a sense of “where do I belong” than Asian Americans do, and I’d argue lots of half Asians are more sexualized too, seen as “more exotic”. At the end of the day, they’re allowed to share their trauma because it’s real

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Hotter take: people who play the "who has it worse" game are actively choosing to be part of the problem

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Why

Didn’t someone post this same bait post the other day? You are being harsh and mean spirited. Similar≠literally the same.

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Also consider that them being white passing means that others blame their race for the shootings even though they’re Asian too and experience trauma from the shootings themselves also. That’s a struggle you can’t relate to. Stop trying to put these people down. Direct your frustration to the people actually responsible for the shootings and those who are justifying them, not those who are experiencing pain too but who you think are overreacting and should feel less pain. Imagine telling someone “you’re not Asian enough to feel as traumatized by this as I am”. That’s what you’re saying.

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You sound like a bot trying to sow more division in this country.

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Yikes, sorry that it comes off this way

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Who hurt you?

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Your post isn’t helpful.

Half Asians have their own struggles too. But I think everyone is being too harsh on OP. Being mixed with white can come with some privilege (ie non foreign last name, easier to fit in with Western beauty standards, ability to pass as white in white spaces for some, etc).

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Thanks EY1. Yes that’s right, I do recognize that being half asian has its own struggles, I just don’t equate the two but understand it’s not important to parse out the differences right now

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Who are you to determine who is white passing or Asian passing? If we’ve learned anything from Megan Markle, it’s that if any one of your parents is a minority, you can no longer be white passing, no matter how white you may look.

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I fully agree with you both, that there’s a spectrum of colorism. But I err on the side of let’s not compete with each other in the minority struggle contest. We should focus on issues for those lower on the spectrum, because solving those issues helps everyone else, but let’s not invalidate halfie experiences either.

Barking up the wrong tree my friend. What do you know about their struggle? Probably nothing because you've never been one.

I've heard from a friend who's half and half that Asians mistake him for being a white all the time, but no white person has ever made that mistake. In a world where we amplify differences, I can imagine that their struggle isn't less than what Asians go through. To whites who are used to seeing white people up close, a half white doesn't quite pass as a full white. So to the eyes of racists, they are just as Asian as the rest of us.

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I don't think you understood me or read what I wrote carefully

People like you are what’s wrong with this country. Always pushing for discrimination and racism while continuing to play the victim card

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I’m half and I’m not white passing. Don’t make assumptions. Peoples experiences are real.

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I have a half asian, half white child who is full of love and just wants acceptance with peers. Posts like this crush me as his mom Bc I’ve heard biracial adults say they never felt like either side accepted them. At least the torment I felt as a child was lessened bc I had an Asian friend group who accepted me fully.

For my son, I have heard his entire short life from his white side friends/family that he looks like me, and my side of family/friends say he looks more white and like his dad. Now that he’s 6, he’s old enough to realize the message between the lines is “you aren’t like us” from both sides.

Please reconsider your stance, it’s harmful and hurtful, and prejudiced.

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First of all, I applaud your decision to question why you held this thought and open this topic for debate in FB.

These types of thoughts contribute to greater discrimination within the AAPI community by driving needless division amongst ourselves that fracture our pan-Asian voting bloc. Half-Asians don't really "fit" in anywhere, and whether white-passing or not, they don't look white to white people. You also need to recognize that half-Asians struggle in different ways, including racism from within in their respective AAPI communities.

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Thank you and I wanted to understand the other perspectives, in hopes to expand my narrow viewpoint. Appreciate you being open vs attacking as others have done. But I understand what I said is hurtful and retraumatizing for others.

I guess the point I’m making is that the trauma experienced just isn’t the same- but I also understand the point that it’s not important right now to parse out the difference

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1. People are are mixed with other races/White and Asian can of course and likely DO experience racism, that is true and we should listen.

2. HOWEVER there is a ladder, or as Sonya Renee Taylor calls it “a ladder of bodily hierarchy”. In the US, Western Society we know being mixed with White will likely elevate that person above a full Asian, Black etc. so while that person still faces racism it is different and not to the same degree as a whole as what people who are not mixed white deal with. This is a type of Colorism we know exists in the Asian culture and outside of it. Sonya explains it well here https://www.instagram.com/tv/CMSXKVHgT6i/?igshid=sup505m6l3q1

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I’m with you M1. This is helpful. Thank you for not dismissing my post as “racist” and instead share facts and discuss difficult topics

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“The trauma isn’t the same?”

If you’re referring to the recent shooting, I can assure you I feel exactly the same as you as a half-Asian person. I have parents and siblings and other relatives who could just as well have been one of the victims.

If you’re referring to the broader experience of being Asian-American, you’re delusional. I and every other “white-passing” half-Asian I know went through all the same shit you did growing up, and much more. We get all of the negative Asian stereotypes PLUS the added trauma of people like you claiming we aren’t Asian enough despite it literally being in our blood lol.

Step off your high horse and stop embarrassing yourself with your thinly veiled disdain for other minorities. 🤡

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“Being black isn't what I'm trying to be, it's what I am. I'm running the same race and jumping the same hurdles you are, so why are you tripping me up?” - Carlton Banks

Replace black with asian.

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Bad taste, A1.

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There’s a CollegeHumor sketch from years ago about mixed race people and whether a jury from each race considers them X race. For black people, there’s the “one drop rule”. For Asians, the question becomes a lot murkier.

For me personally, I’ve seen way too many half Asian/white kids lean way deep into the white and try uncomfortably hard to shed the Asian identity. This included putting down other Asians, making Asian jokes, and otherwise being net negatives for AAPI to validate their own whiteness. That’s not to say that kind of behavior is exclusive to hapas nor that they don’t experience anti-Asian racism, but they do have the privilege of switching. The anti-Asian racism they do face is also on average less severe than the kind full Asians face in the US. You can’t talk about white privilege and then pretend it’s a non factor for half white, white-passing people.

However, their stories are still part of our community’s. I’m not going to play oppression olympics with someone who actively identifies as Asian, is about the culture, and for our cause.

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This is how I feel and I agree. My experiences with half Asian- half white people have been that they can “pick and choose” when they want to be white and when they want to be more Asian- usually when it’s perceived to be more interesting or unique. The point you make re: privilege is excellent and more eloquent than I made in my original post.

Again, not negating their trauma and yes, it is part of our cause

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OP, I don’t fault you for having this thought and asking the question. But I hope you’ve taken these responses to heart. And I hope you can now understand why your line of thinking (Asians suggesting halfies aren’t Asian; while whites suggest halfies aren’t white) is a core part of the ~trauma~ that is being mixed

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This is helpful and apologies to those I’ve hurt with this post. I am frustrated by the half Asians I know who pick and choose when they are white and when they are Asian. If this doesn’t resonate, that’s fine, we have differing experiences.

Appreciate the challenges

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It might seem like we are choosing when to be one and when to be the other, but when you’re mixed, the reality is we ARE one AND the other, depending on the context. We vascillate. Pls don’t take that away from us bc it’s tricky identifying as people who don’t really belong to either and this just punctuates the feeling of belonging. Inclusivity matters for us, too.

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OP has a point that some hapas enjoy privileges that come along with being half white. Some may not, and some do face biracially-unique discrimination that is similar to anti-AAPI discrimination.

Hapas are born out of biracial relationships that were formed during an era of less progressive racial views, so I can see how some parents (and children) might have chosen to suppress their Asian side in order to gain a perceived societal advantage.

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