Question for fellow girls in bowl.. how do you manage period related challenges at work?
My wife has PMS related magnified mood swings and I am not able to be supportive enough, in her words. She isn’t in consulting and when I said I have never heard/experienced any such mood swing problems from my workplace colleagues, she said i am ignorant and lack empathy. Any suggestions on how I could be a better husband during PMS times?

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OP - really surprised that you have not heard of this before and I can understand your wife’s frustration, when you said that to her. But the fact that you posted this so you can educate yourself and get inputs from folks on your situation, that itself means that you truly care and want to help your wife and be a better husband. So I’m proud of you 😊

Firstly - you may not have heard about your colleagues at work experiencing this, because it is a sensitive topic and not everyone is comfortable talking about it openly. So please keep that in mind.

Second - every woman’s experience during her period is different. So it would be good for you to understand that and not compare the way you did. I’m sorry to say but that was kind of insensitive though you may not have meant it that way. And also, every person’s threshold of pain, way of handling the situation etc is different.

Third - as women grow older, and experience hormonal changes in their body, the periods and associated symptoms also change. So maybe your wife did not experience this before, but is now - and it does happen.

To give some examples from my own experience -
Last year, for about 6-8 months suddenly I had very painful periods. So much so that I could not get out of the bed and was in excruciating pain. I was literally crying in pain and had to end up taking sick leave for most of those months for 2 consecutive days every month. Sometimes 3.
I also have realized that for the past 2 years, I feel anxious and more pessimistic and just overall negative about things during my period. That’s not my personality - I’m known in my friends circle as the most optimistic person out of all. But it’s different during your period. Women go through so much during their periods, during child birth and our bodies are constantly changing with time.

Ok now on to the advice:
1. Some people take medicines that help them with the pain. I personally don’t because in general, I try to avoid popping meds into my mouth unless I can’t avoid it. But that’s one avenue you could try - IF your wife is open to it, and if pain is one of the symptoms she experiences.

2. Drinking lots of water really helps me. Not just during the period but in the days leading up to it. I’ve noticed that my periods are a bit less painful when my diet is clean and I’m well hydrated. Overall, I feel better. So you can try it.

3. There are 2 types of teas that I keep sipping on, and it is super helpful with the pain and other period symptoms like mood swings and general well being :
CCFT (Coriander Cumin Fennel Tea)
Ginger Tea

4. Sometimes mincing ginger and mixing with little honey and having it also helps.

5. Hot water bags.

These are a few tips - try them and see if it helps your wife. Also, please be kind OP. Please be understanding and patient. Remember - during those days she is going through something that she cannot describe and you cannot comprehend as you have not experienced it. So just be there for her and ask her how you can support her. And be patient and kind. All will be well 😊

likeupliftinghelpful

Thank you very much for such a detailed answers. I am sure now that I have a lot to learn. I am sorry for being ignorant and now that I have been told so clearly, I feel we could do better awareness about these issues at workplace so that women feel supported and take time off when they experience such things without being conscious.

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Never ever react or compare to anyone living or dead during that phase of month.

likefunny

Thank you

I have no suggestions to help you. But, I have a question. When you say ‘Question for fellow girls’… wouldn’t that mean you are a girl yourself? 🤔

funny

I had the same reaction as EY1. 😂

likefunny

I can tell you it takes a lot of patience & grinding of my jaw to get through a day at work.. PMS is no joke. Leave her to rest, make food or order in food, offer a back rub, & don’t say a word other than “yes, dear!”

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Talk less and give her importance
Electric heat packs help them ease pain
Cook or Order food so she can rest

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Just buy a heating pad from Amazon

Painkillers for the pain, a hot bag (electric or regular )

Take over the chores and cooking for those few days or get hired help, let her rest, give her the space to make decisions on any social gatherings with friends and family. Be nice to her. It's hard if the other person is irritated but atleast try be more patient.pms can lead to terrible mood swings.

Thank you for letting me know that I have been so wrong all this while.

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