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Having been on the receiving end of it- I think selfishness and cowardliness is usually what drives it.
When I was in college, my boyfriend at the time and I spent a summer in separate cities. I ended up dating another guy that summer at the same time. We worked together, and I really liked him. I was conflicted about which guy I wanted to be with. Had been dating my BF since high school, but really liked new guy too. I didn’t break up with BF that summer. Work guy knew about BF but BF didn’t know about work guy. It was a mess.
Eventually broke up with BF a year or so later and dated work guy off and on for a while. I am still friends with him, but not BF. 🤷🏼♀️
Sometimes, cheating happens and it’s complicated.
Exactly, sounds like it would be easy just to be honest it’s not like y’all were married