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Really depends on the crew, I’ve had it both ways, some are strict and annoying, others make a joke like they “can’t see anything wrong here” and let the pupper stay on my lap. I kinda cover him with a blanket or shawl so it’s not obvious or annoying to the neighbors, and he’s chilling under there.
Worst comes to worst, say that you (or the dog), get severe anxiety if not held (mine literally shivers like crazy when he’s on the ground), they rarely care enough to cause a scene. Also be very nice to them when boarding and let the dog say hi while he/she is in the carry on (if the crew seems friendly) — the charm offensive usually works too lol
I don’t think a crew member would care, but if your seat neighbor cares you’ll need to respect that.
I had a flight where the flight attendant let me hold my dog and was super friendly about it. On the flight back the flight attendant told me in a really rude and obnoxious manner to put him under the seat and then yelled at me to zip the carrier when all I was doing was putting my hand on him because he was shaking. I half did it and then went back to comforting him until he calmed down. All Delta. Just depends on the flight attendants.
Mentor
Non-sevice dogs are generally not permitted out of carrier and a lot of flight attendants are super strict. Get a carrier where your pup can stick it's head out. Then you can reassure doggo. Good luck!
Xanax works wonders