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Go kiss your mom's feet
My mom s routine, get up at 7 AM. Prepare food , put clothes in Washing machine, dry the clothes, serve food for everyone, wash utensils, clean the house / kitchen by the time all this is done it's 12. She takes a break for two hours, eats , takes a nap, speaks to her mom. Again at three she makes evening tiffin, fold clothes, cook dinner, serve, wash utensils and clean the kitchen and done by 9. She is 60 now and this is her routine now, she has been relentlessly doing stuff for us for the last 30 years. The lack of break / lack of change in routine / emotional burden shouldn't be underestimated.
Read this OP. This is what “home makers” do.
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I am a guy and want to be a SAHD. Not that it’s easy or more paid but coz I think it contributes to the society by raising well balanced human beings. Creating strong memories and a home environment where kids want to rush home at any stage of their lives. That’s just me with a 5 year old and a 2 year old. Debates can carry on whether I should be paid and why my wife should do it but she wants to be very successful. Any SAHP gives the support to their spouses to chase their dreams. Do I want my kids to give my example to square other hard workers? Naah, I don’t care. I do want my kids to realize every work is equally important but maybe not equally valued/compensated. So they should be free to choose their paths without caring about people belittling any of the paths.
I’m sorry OP, but you sound blissfully unaware. I want to believe that you are curious to learn but you sound not-enough-thankful for what your mom does.
1. Maids don’t magically do work, they need to be watched and told what to do.
2. Your example covers food - cooking and groceries. But cooking for 4 people is a significant amount of prep work FYI. Do you know how annoying it is when you’re standing in front of the gas making roti’s (each involves multiple steps) keep disappearing like you made ZERO progress?
3. What about Utensils? Putting clothes into the washing machine? Taking it out of the washing machine? Taking it off the stand, sorting and giving it to the Dhobi? Making the bed? Watering the plants? I mean I could go on forever 😂
4. Your mom is not a machine. She needs time off too. Don’t you watch TV when you come back from work?
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So I genuinely want to understand what do homemakers do all day? We don't live in old times when you did everything by hand.. Today there are gadgets for everything which reduce time spent in the kitchen.. I understand being with kids when they are young but what about when they are in school.. What do they do at home? The aunties I saw in my neighborhood spent their afternoons watching TV or doing kitty parties? They would go grocery shopping in their cars when husbands returned from office.. My parents just got groceries when returning from work..
Genuinely curious about this & don't intend to offend anyone.. Happy to change my mind..
So OP is your question whether homemakers deserve to be paid or whether homemakers don't need to be homemakers and need to get a job?
I think OP is trying to understand the rationale for a perceived equivalence between the work done / contributions made by stay at home moms and working moms, when in his/her experience a working mom does as much house work in additional to professional work.
I totally respect any woman’s choice to stay at home or work, but I don’t participate in such discussions as it’s easy to get labeled as anti-feminist for trying to understand this equivalence.
The question is muddled by bringing in the concept of at home labor needing to have a monetary value. This is easier to justify on the basis of opportunity cost.
Op wants to understand what home makers do all day
Giving example of my mom(home maker). Sanity of home, cooking, washing clothes, paying bills, grocery, taking care of small garden of flower pots, preparing home for every festival/ritual, hosing relatives and guests, participate in society meetings on behalf of entire family and list goes on. That’s almost 4-6 hrs for work for her. Then she gets to her “me time”.
Have seen moms with kids have all the above plus kids responsibilities and if husband is lazy, his responsibilities too 😂
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This was my mom's routine before she retired
Wake up at 630 am
Make breakfast for us all
Leave for school where she taught science at 730 am
Come back home at 1pm
Make lunch for us
When we were young, she would help with homework too
Cook dinner at 7 pm
Cleanup after dinner
Sleep at 10 am
Keep in mind Saturday was half day so Sunday was the only relief she got.
She did for 25+ years non stop.
She was a professional and also a home maker.
It is tough to be a working mom. We have to be thankful to our moms for not dropping the ball on us. Call me a momma's boy if you like.
If you are a Homemaker, your life ain't easy either. My mother in law had 3 kids and the day was the same may be with the exception of 8a-1p but her children workload was 1.5 times. 3 kids vs. my mom who had 2 kids.
We had a caretaker who came for basic cleaning and for washing dishes.
You said yourself your mother has a maid. Most homemakers clean the house take care of the kids, drop them to school, do homework make sure the kids shower, etc, cook and the biggest job of all they take care of their needy husbands, plus perform in the sack. Don't try to trivialize their jobs, it is a lot of work to be a good housewife and mom. Women are not appreciated as they should be!!!!!!!!!!
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I’m unsure what you’re getting at but I feel like you’re discounting the emotional labor homemakers have to deal with.
OP all you will get here is hate and abuse from woke and cancel culture crowd.
There’s nothing woke. There is respect for the person who does EVERYTHING for you, without complaining ever.