Recently my wife and I found out we are going to have a baby. And this has made me immensely happy. Since she became pregnant my wife’s interest in sex has gone down. She says she does not get wet even if she gets turned on. I also think she is just afraid of either hurting herself or the baby. It’s been 3 months and I think I am fine for now. But no sex for 9 months and then a few months after the baby is born sounds rough. Anyone been through this? How did you deal?

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Cant hurt the baby by going down on her

likehelpful

Totally down. Just that she won’t let me go down :p

I'm currently in my first trimester and I know that it's been the same situation for my husband. I'm exhausted and nauseous, we have struggled for years to get pregnant so I'm extra cautious, and frankly I just have no desire. They say that you feel more like yourself again in the second trimester so we both are looking forward to that time to come! Be there for her and be understanding of how she is feeling right now. And don't put pressure on...that probably puts her off even more.

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Nauseous or nauseated? I hope it’s the latter...

Recent IconRecent

Side chick

likefunny

D3 seems feisty

👋👋

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Thanks for your nuggets of wisdom BDO 1. Nice adulting there. Have a great weekend.

👄

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Use the mouth

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What about maybe increasing the romance and non-sex cuddle time? It won’t fix the hormone part and wont necessarily guarantee sex, but it will won’t hurt to keep the connection strong until the 2nd and 3rd trimester when she’s feeling better.

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Yes. That’s a good way of looking at it and I am trying. We have taken to long walks in the evening and cuddling when sleeping. Which is great. Just that it leaves me horny sometimes but wouldn’t change it for the world. And will help when her libido is back.

Congrats! I don't think sex will hurt the baby but women like to take every precautions and the first trimester is critical. It must also be an hormonal thing.
Hopefully it gets better for you but it's just one of those things you have to deal with when you are expecting.
My wife sex level got super high during the third trimester and she wanted to have sex every night. I believe she will come along and give you some after she is sure that the baby is okay.

Thanks EY2! Love the perspective and the positivity of your response. Hope you and the family are happy and healthy during this pandemic.

Congrats! Hormones are especially crazy in the first trimester - that can cause dryness and affect sex drive. Also you feel like shit during those first few months too. Unless her doctor has said otherwise, sex can’t hurt the baby at all. Be patient - she’s growing a human and an entire temporary organ (placenta!) that can make things go a bit haywire.

Thanks SC1. Doctor hasn’t said anything. And agree on being patient.

Congratulations.. with our first child i was more worried about hurting my wife or the baby.. so I asked the doc and the docs reassurance helped.. maybe ask the doc in front of ur wife on her next appointment and see if that helps..

Thanks EY4. I think wife knows that having sex won’t hurt the baby. I think she has no desire right now. Don’t think we need the doctor conversation, I think she just needs to feel more comfortable with the pregnancy and have less issues on a day-to-day basis (nausea, acidity, bowel irritation). Once that happens things should be better

That’s rough man. Sometimes being pregnant makes them super horny, sometimes it has the opposite effect.

I’d get a bottle of lube. If she DTF, use it with her. If not, use it on yourself.

It gets better second trimester - wife was a fking freak 2nd and 3rd trimester. On and don’t bank on sex post delivery lol. RIP sex life for a good 6-12 months. It’s very different when baby is here

The project goal is complete. Having sex was working towards completion of the project.

Update: 2nd trimester has brought desire back. Had sex twice last week. Everyone on this thread who said desire comes back with a bang post first trimester was right 😃

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