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Seeing someone who said after a month it’s too soon to know where our relationship is going. Curious abt how others feel—how long till you know it’s gonna be long term?

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Counter party is compartmentalizing the relationship and keeping you out of arm’s length (and they are able to do so likely because they are either seeing other people or are not in need of a relationship right this moment) and it’s getting into your head. You know what you want out of the relationship, however you call it out as feelings of confusion here due to complacency, giving in to the power that the other party has over you.

I would strongly advise disentanglement for your own mental sanity, even though you evidently want more (one month is honestly pretty short, and you may as well identify other suitors). Allow reverse psychology to inevitably play itself out, and the former chaser will then perhaps be chased.

“People who know, know how to play the game.”

likeuplifting

A month is too soon. Six months might be too soon. It depends on the person and the relationship. My husband told me he loved me after dating 6 weeks. I didn’t say it back. No way I’m in love with someone in 6 weeks. But that’s me. Clearly that didn’t mean the relationship wasn’t going to be long term. We’ve been married 10 years

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I actually find this pretty helpful. Of course people will say everyone is different and maybe that’s just how it is, but sometimes I wonder... I’ve been in two relationships where things are going well, and then my partner ended it suddenly. And they tell me it’s not me, they just weren’t feeling it anymore. While maybe that’s how they really feel, this has created a lot of confusion for me afterwards. Especially because both times my partners acted like everything was fine and normal before breaking up. So I’ve been wondering if others feel like if they have to “know” pretty early on in order for a relationship to last. Does that make sense? Maybe to put it another way, I’m afraid that any hesitation is a sign that my partner thinks I’m not “the one."

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If that person truly wanted something long term or a future with you, you’d know. If you have doubts or if they’re playing games then it’s not it chief.

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Don’t compare your relationship to others. There’s a good red table talk on this one with jay shetty

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I’ve seen a little of it but haven’t watched yet. Will check it out!

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We have been opening up about deeper subjects kind of slowly, so we’ve had a few, but not many conversations about our pasts and hopes, etc. So I think the response is reasonable. Frankly I’m confused about my own feelings too

🤔

I think that’s a pretty reasonable thing to say after a month

Takes one date for me... not that hard to figure it out. Now it doesn’t mean I know how successful it will be but you should know pretty fast

My friend is just like that - said 1 month is way too short for someone to fall in love..gotta see for the long-term

I’m like dude by that time you find out you Truly in love with her I’ll probably be retiring of old age

My friend said 6 months at least..if it’s meant to be it’s meant to be ..no rush

For me I’m exact opposite..When I met my hubby I asked straight up (on 2nd date) if he sees long term for us ..and if yes we give it a try (I deep down somehow knew he is it ...DK how to really describe it)

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Post Photo
likefunny

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'An Empirical Analysis of Racial Differences in Use of Police Force' by Roland Fryer

Link to study:

https://scholar.harvard.edu/fryer/publications/empirical-analysis-racial-differences-police-use-force

Some bullets:

- Blacks 53% more likely to experience any use of force relative to 15% for whites
- All controls available, officers 46.6% less likely to discharge firearms before being attacked if suspect is black.
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- Blacks are 21% less likely to report voluntary interaction with police than whites.

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