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I am a development sector professional (Masters in social work) with 6 years experience in health, education, livelihood promotion , empowerment of women and adolescents, child protection areas with International NGOs and CSR.
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Just be honest, calm, and back up everything you say with an example or instance. Don't say "you" and cite events. If you have the receipts that person won't take it personally and either give you a good explanation you didn't expect or step it up.
I STRONGLY suggest avoiding use of a compliment sandwich - very high likelihood that the person will hear only the good and the important / hard part of the message lost. I typically start with "I asked for this meeting to share some direct and specific feedback that may be hard to hear. I am sharing it with the genuine intent to see you improve and be successful." Then be specific about the shortcomings / ineffective actions, bring to light the impact of those actions on the client / team / you / person. Close by inviting their reaction, encourage questions for clarification, set specific behavior changes and milestone for checking progress.
Be honest and give it. We suck at giving it EY.
OP, I really hope you are going to provide manager feedback during a time that this individual can work on improving it and salvage a review or rating. I absolutely cannot stand when leaders or counselors gives feedback after the fact when it is too late for the person to do anything about it. particularly counselors...it comes off very shady.
Compliment sandwich
Absolutely EY3, the individual has the next 4-5 months to improve and will have regular progress touch points every 2 weeks. All of our employees deserve a chance to improve and meet or exceed expectations
^Thats a really bad idea. Just be honest and give feedback. If it's a real issue it needs to be brought up for real.
Avoid making it personal. Speak out of respect about what is not working.
Agreed with @Strategy too. Have specific examples of his/her underperformance, as well as specifics of what things you'd like to see done differently going forward. Perhaps providing suggestions on how to develop those skills or close any learning gaps would be appreciated too.
You're a senior manager. You haven't had these conversations yet? If not, I want your teams. Sorry I've offered no answer to your question, the people at the top of the thread had great advice and I have nothing left to offer. Good luck OP.
All of this advice so far is super helpful. Thanks to each of you.
^I don't think that's a smart way to go about it. Be honest and up front. You don't need to make anything up, if you're straightforward you should be fine. Regular KPIs and touch points are essential
I agree with SM1, compliment sandwich is worse than useless. Schedule it as a performance chat, and then:
1) Ask what they're getting out of the project, if they're enjoying it, or if they're having any issues;
2) After that's exhausted, hit them hard with the feedback. Be diplomatic, but tell them what's wrong, and that it needs to be fixed. Make sure they understand, and invite discussion about it; and
3) End by summarizing what they do well, and assure them that if they work on what's wrong with 2, they could be a great manager.
Compliment sandwich is a sucker punch and the inconsistencies devalue the whole. Try this three part approach: 1. State what happened - facts, actions, behavior - and confirm that they agree with your facts (no judgement at this point). This gives a common starting point for discussion. Example, "Do you recall during the meeting today when you opened your laptop and starting typing?" Answer, "Yes." Just the facts. 2. Next discuss the implications and meaning of #1. This is where you can share your judgement and experience re: how what they did or what happened and how it came off as bad / poor behavior. And you can hear their side of why they might think it was fine. Example, "When you started working on your laptop during the meeting it made it look like you were checking email or had more important things to do. This was especially bad because it was while the client was speaking. It looked like you were dismissing them personally. And it was awkward when I had to ask you to rejoin the meeting and close your laptop." Response, "Wow, I didn't see it that way. I figured my part of the meeting was finished and the rest of the meeting didn't have much to do with me or my workstream, so I figured it would be more productive for me to work on tomorrow's deliverable that we're behind on." You: "Well, can you see how that might have been misconstrued?" "Yeah, wow, my bad". 3. Last step is to agree on remediation, improvement, next steps. How will we learn from this and not have it happen again? Example: "So in the future if you have a lot of work to do, let me know before the meeting and I can excuse you when your update is finished. But also keep in mind, there may be other workstream updates that you may not think have anything to do with you, until you hear something unexpected that does impact you. That's why we have these meetings -- sometimes you never know what's going to have an impact on your team." Response, "Thanks - that makes sense. Good to know." Or as a way of getting them to think a little harder, start #3 with, "How will we learn from this and not have it happen again?" And let them come up with a solution. I've found this approach to be very effective. Also works for positive feedback: 1. What happened, 2. Why it was so great, 3. How we can do more of this in the future.
holy shit D4, are you on the bench? and who were your 3 buddies also on the bench that had time to read your novel of a response and upvote it?
That's awesome to hear. I know I learn the most with honest and direct feedback good or bad, but it's difficult to get .
How you give the feedback ... direct ... indirect...compliment sandwich matters less than the fact the person is getting feedback.
Use the method that you are most comfortable with (that way you wont delay im giving it) and that will work for the person (give it in a way that they feel that there is hope to improve)
Be honest and project true concern for helping that person get their career on track. I've had these conversations many times and it is always tough if you are an empathetic person who truly cares about your staff/counselee. The best employees will appreciate your forthrightness. Others will get defensive and pout.
Reiterate expectations, provide helpful feedback, establish a KPI and regular touchpoints.
Just say
"It appears to a set of people that you are slacking (use your own language).
Im not sure that is the case but that is what i am hearing and here are the reasons why people think that.
I dont know the full story but i just wanted to share what people think because perception is reality."
By using a fake 3rd party to relay the information - she cant really argue with you and she wont get embarrassed because you are just passing along your observations.
Then offer to help her (if you want)