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Pro
Does anyone have experience with tutoring gigs?
Anyone joined nagarro from oracle, plz dm
What are y’all drinking tonight?
Additional Posts in Relationships
Conversation Starter
Conversation Starter
Pro
Does anyone have experience with tutoring gigs?
Anyone joined nagarro from oracle, plz dm
What are y’all drinking tonight?
Did she tell you about it? (Yes, you should work it out)
Did she try to keep it from you and someone else told you? (Move on)
Making out with someone else at the bar is pretty egregious if you’re in an exclusive relationship. Definitely cheating. Up to you if you want to stay, but if you do know this is a pretty big red flag.
This is not infidelity. You’ve been together 3 months. Chill out, make sure it’s clear you’re exclusive and move forward.
Your reply tells me that you should probably end it then. it was clearly exclusive, and you’re uncomfortable with this.
Nope, move on
Once a cheater, always a cheater
Next time will be worse
No move on
Tough decision. I’ve been here before (happened w/ my roommate at the time) and I stayed w/ my GF for her to only dump me months later.
In hindsight, I should’ve ended things, and I would caution any guy out there to really think long and hard about whether or not you can trust the person your with afterwards. If the answer is yes, then you should stay, if the answer is no you should break up and start fresh w/ someone new.
Kissing another guy is DEFINITELY cheating, and you should hold her responsible for what she did. If her friend wasn’t there, who knows what it could have led to. I would dump her if I were you, she’s just “assuring” you so you won’t leave. Actions speak louder than words and her actions let you down, sorry bro
Pro
It sort of seems like she is already trying to gas light you by telling you it wasn't cheating. It was cheating and a mistake.
Personally I wouldn't love it if someone I was with wanted to stay later at the bars than me. You just aren't setting yourself up for success. Nothing good will ever come from it and lots of bad things can happen. Of course it doesn't mean they will...
It’s a hard one. After only 3 months, I’d move on. She can claim to love you but it’s only been 3 months.
Pro
Yeah honestly if she claims to love you this early on it's pry just infatuation - which is still real. However if she's willing to cheat on you during the infatuation phase, what is she going to be willing to do when the infatuation fades?
Rising Star
Focus on yourself, brother. Save yourself from having to deal with more sufferings. She is for the streets. Leave now man!
Not a personal fan of the "high value" terminology (no that you aren't a valuable person, I just think everyone is in their own way). But I'd agree this is a tough one to see through. If it was intense enough that someone had to break it up, I wouldn't stay. What would it have turned into if there wasn't someone to stop her? Drunk actions are sober thoughts, they say.
Respect yourself and what you want... Cus this gal clearly didn't...
No way. This never ever ends well. Keep it moving.
@OP, FFS move on and don’t look back. The people telling you otherwise on this thread are not invested in you or your personal success. There is no scenario where take her back and win a happy relationship. She’ll never respect you and she’ll treat you like a doormat for the rest of your relationship. You’ll lose your friends respect as well.
Go out and get laid. Lose the one-itis, and never look back, except as perhaps a learning/growth experience.
What did you decide to do, OP?
Pls tell me what you decided to do OP?
Rising Star
I would start playing the field personally. As a high value man you have options and she needs to know this if she’s going to respect you.
Sorry you are going through this, good luck.
Rising Star
I would start dating other interests, while maintaining the casual relationship with her. If she is casual I would explore the field and see what else is out there. Nothing wrong with having a few irons in the fire.
How old are you guys and have you discussed being exclusive? I definitely made mistakes in my 20s but not after we discussed being exclusive. If you want to give it another shot, I would just make it abundantly clear to her what you consider cheating, and that if it does happen again, you will leave (and then of course you have to follow through with it).
I also wonder if she tried to deny it... If she tried to lie about it, then that's a bigger red flag and maybe time to move on.
If she loved you for real, she wouldn’t have done this. If being drunk is her excuse, maybe she needs professional help for her drinking habits. Could you imagine being married with kids to this person and they try to brush off making out with a stranger at a bar??
Good for you! That is amazing work you’ve put in. Hope you feel proud of yourself!
She’s for the streets :) any woman who wants a man wouldn’t mess up 3 months in
Chief
How old are you guys?
I feel like infidelity is hard to get over. You can try to move on from it, but you may always have this underlying resentment (even if you don’t realize it) which will cause friction in the relationship (and then it looks like you’re the bad guy even though she was the root cause of it). Once trust is lost, it’s hard to regain.