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This job is miserable without travel.
McKittensey & Company, anyone?

McKinsey & Company Does working at a McKinsey subsidiary or specialist practice open doors similar to working in generalist consulting there? Examples include Orpheus, Finalta, QuantumBlack and other acquired companies. Can you work there for 1-2 years and benefit from a halo effect that helps you enter industry more easily? McKinsey & Company
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Sounds like what United would do
They tried that with me one day. The lady felt bad because I had an obviously painful hangover, so she nudged me through. Thank you alcohol gods. Never had issues since though.
I got a hand me down Tumi recently. It's 16 inches wide which is wider than most airlines allow. So far in my travels I've never had to measure at the gate domestically. Hope they don't start!
Thanks @A1! Will make sure to have a few shots before heading to the airport ;)
OP at least it looks like it's the exception rather than the norm. Hope I didn't jinx myself!
And not to mention that it fits the measurement box (handles included) except for about a third to a half of an inch on the side...
That was exactly my problem D2... It was 16 instead of 14 (just measured, so I guess more than the half inch I thought). Stopped by the Tumi store where they confirmed that they've been getting daily visits of frustrated AA passengers who had to check them.