So I know I’m sinking into alcoholism but I don’t necessarily want to stop it. What do I do? I still like the feeling of being drunk but I know it’s impacting me in a negative ways. Not sure where to go from here. Any advice?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Therapy. In particular, a therapist who specializes in or at least has experience with addiction. In my experience, a lot of people considering sobriety get scared off by the AA stuff.
You will need to want to stop in order to make it work. AA and hearing the stories of those who hit rock bottom might help you want it. But you do have to want it. Good luck to you.

like

This. The rooms of AA are great for hearing the stories of others and finding hope, but they aren’t the “solution” for everyone. Therapy is a huge help and there are many sobriety-focused groups and communities that have sprung up in the past few years, particularly online. Plugging into a sober community is important, in my experience, to rebuilding a life without alcohol.

like

I feel this. I went through it too. I did AA for about 6 months. It took me time to work through step 6. I took my time bc I knew it wasn’t a race.

I relapsed. Called my sponsor for support and help and got nothing. The next day she told me I needed to find a sponsor closer to where I lived. I poured myself into AA and then didn’t get the support I needed. This is where therapy is SO important. You can’t rely on others / other drunks to get the help you need. It’s good for community, but they can’t help you through the trama you aren’t coping with in a healthy way. I know AA works for many, it didn’t for me. I would still try it bc it did get me going on getting sober. Then figure out what you’re cup of tea is, and more importantly, see a therapist to help you process what is making you drink the way you do.

Im over a year sober. I never finished the 12 steps and some of my family resents me for it. Know that there isn’t a formula to get sober, it’s your story and you can build your own recovery for what you need.
I wish you all the best!

like

I want to add, I am a GREAT teacher. I will brag, I’m good at my job. There is this idea that teachers aren’t people, and man… am I a PERSON. Ive struggled. Ive battled. Ive fought. And I’ve been a stronger person for my students because of it. One thing I never let happen was letting alcohol get in the way of doing my job and helping my kids. I saw it coming, I knew it was next. That’s honestly one of the main reasons why I went to therapy and got sober, my students deserved the best part of me.

Being a teacher shouldn’t dictate your life… but it changed mine. Being a teacher made me get help because I love my kids.

like

I looooooooooved the feeling of being drunk. What I didn’t love were the hangovers, the blackouts, the crashed cars, the nights in jail and hospitals, the disappointed friends and family members, and the infidelity.

If it weren’t for those pesky consequences drinking would be amazing. Unfortunately, as an alcoholic, I can not guarantee that I won’t wreak havoc on myself and those around me once I start drinking. And more often than not I am left in a state of pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. Thankfully, I too found recovery in the rooms of AA and I love it.

Alcoholism takes us a to a very lonely place. Even when I was around people I never felt a true connection, I never felt like I fit in, and I was generally uncomfortable in my own skin. In recovery I’ve found acceptance and fellowship and something more.

The key to recovery is to find it before you end up in prison, in a mental hospital, or die. Your bottom can always be lower, or it can be where you’re at now if you choose to put down the shovel and stop digging.

Finally, this reminds me of a spot in the AA Big Book:

Post Photo
like

Thanks everyone. My drinking is definitely self-medication to deal with life. Significant traumas from younger years, stress from family and work, kids, etc etc. I feel like it’s my way to escape. I never drink before or during work, I try to only drink every other day, but I often drink alone and I always drink to excess. I can’t stop once I start, until it’s gone or I need to sleep.

I’ve been to a counselor just a few times. Never told my spouse and didn’t use insurance so it wasn’t sustainable from a cost perspective. I don’t think I’m even close to rock bottom but who knows?

I wish I drank less but I don’t feel ready to give it up.

like

You don’t have to hit rock bottom before you quit so stop waiting for it before you make a move.

like

What do you think it would take to get you to feel like you are ready? What negative impact would be your final straw?

Until you want it, nothing will change. It sounds like you want to want to stop but unfortunately this is a disease that convinces us we can keep going, sometimes until it’s too late. I know for me I had to be pretty beat up and desperate before I could really stop and stay stopped.

like

High bottom drunk here that used alcohol and drugs to escape daily living the thing I heard in the halls of AA that got me going was " try not drinking or drugging for 90 days if you don't like it we will gladly refund your misery" that and many others things and I stand here today over 35 years clean and sober. Give it a shot what do you got to lose?

like

If you’re willing to give sobriety a try, might be worthwhile to see if life sober might be better than life drunk. Many paths to try, you’ll get lots of opinions on that. Lots of people here are willing to help if you want it.

like

I appreciate everyone taking the time to post with your experiences. I definitely feel much better when I don’t drink and could definitely stand to lose a few pounds.

What exactly did you do when you were thinking about pouring a drink? Call your sponsor? Hit the treadmill? Pray? I know I need to find what works for me but looking for ideas of how to fill that time, and more importantly, replace the urge with something else.

like

Call a program buddy or friend. Or even just text. When I get those urges in my head, they say “sunshine is the best disinfectant” and sharing that urge with someone else goes a long way in releasing it’s power. I also just try to get up and move and go do something else (like a walk). It helps disrupt that pathway and gives me sometime to breathe before I make a stupid decision.

like

What I do and what works for me:

- Pray (my go-to when I’m confronted with alcohol or drinking thoughts: “Higher Power, please keep me sober”)
- Call sponsor or friend in the program
- Read AA literature (sometimes I’ll flip open the Big Book to a random page and more often than not it’s exactly what I needed to read)
- Go to a meeting
- Meditate
- Getting outside
- Just go to sleep
- Any distraction that is not drinking; sometimes they aren’t healthy or wise, like over-eating or buying stuff I don’t need, but either of those are infinity better than a single drink.


There’s actually a book called Living Sober; it’s pretty good and has all sorts of practical advice.

like

Can you describe your current drinking habits?

Related Posts

I am currently a senior associate in M&A tax and was thinking about switching to the Office of Associate Chief Counsel in DC (i.e., IRS's national office and not a field office). Is it difficult to go to a big law firm or in-house from the IRS? I have heard stories where big law firms won't hire someone because he / she was in the government, but not sure if it is true for the Office of Associate Chief Counsel.

like

Do CGI Renegotiates on Offer letter.

For those taking gmat more than 1 time, did your scores improve in the second time? Got a 690 my first one a month ago and retaking this week but I find myself freaking out. My practice test has been 720-730, though the one this weekend dropped to 700 because i was freaking out with verbal. Any encouragement is strongly appreciated 😔😥

like

I (M) am on a budget and need an outfit for 3 summer weddings with very different vibes. Possible to have one base outfit (with variations) for all weddings?

Wedding 1 - very formal. Venue is a museum in a big city, and I’ll be meeting majority of significant other’s family.

Wedding 2 - beach wedding.

Wedding 3 - venue in a small town and reception is an outdoor BBQ.

like

What’s your take on ESG ratings?

like

Hello Desi 🐟, what are your Sunday night dinner plans?

like

How have you or people you know attained a funded PhD from their company?

I love Hispanics!

Post Photo
funnylikehelpful

Divorced mom (no travel) 1 yr ago. Separated 3. I’m starting to think abt dating but I had married my second boyfriend & lack dating exp. On bumble. Rebound vs. relationship? Miss friendship & trust

Hey Fishes

I will be joining Barclays Pune office in December.

I just wanted to know about salary account, do they need account in any specific bank or any banks old account would work?

like

Hi there- I’m trying to research salary range for an Associate Director of Learning & Development or similar in NYC for someone with a doctorate (PsyD), experienced in training/teaching/learning, systems/org & individual interventions & assessments, & 4 years of admin/EA experience for a bit of context. Any insight on base salary or even fit of role/level? Appreciate it!

like

An Honest question-- how have you seen or experienced catty female behavior or passive bullying across your team? I have occasionally run into certain female coworkers that seem to undermine me in various ways, but perhaps it’s all in my head. Any Advice?

like

To all my Tiger King fans out there. IYKYK.

Post Photo
likefunny

If anyone here is wondering how to best use their GI Bill... I HIGHLY recommend using the GI Bill comparison tool. Has anyone else here used it??

like

If London people could move further outside the city not worrying about the commute to office for next one year, where would you go?

like

I have an offer from Deloitte for an Consultant role. The Immigration team seems very slow in getting the H1B Transfer done (been close to a month and LCA not yet filed)
I wanted to know how Deloitte is regarding GC processing, I have my extension next year. Any thoughts ?

Which is good to join..Publicis sapient or LTI?

like

Anybody looking for open positions in Accenture, dm me

likeupliftinghelpful

What are the Designation level at HSBC GSC for Hyderabad location. What is the band for Assistant Manager

Additional Posts in Addiction & Sobriety

Y'all know about this?? Mark your calendars for next year 🗓♥️

Post Photo
like

Feeling so frustrated and scared. I am trying my hardest to be loving to my brother who is addicted to many things. My family has been encouraging him for years to get real help. He’s finally semi-agreed to go to a detox facility and then rehab. However, those are far away from where we all live now. My 70+ dad wants to fly with my brother there to make sure he goes. I understand, but also...there’s a freaking pandemic going on with a virus targeting older people. Cont’d...

like

Raise your hand if you are surviving the holiday season! 🙋‍♀️

like

4 Years Yesterday!

One day at a time.

Post Photo
likeuplifting

What are the most important lessons you have learned at your lowest point and how do they continue helping you?

like

Sharing some thoughts I’ve had lately:

The end of my suffering occurs with the death of my ego. I am reborn when I surrender to life exactly as it is, right at this moment (and it’s always “this moment”). I can begin to grow when I either accept life as it is, or I change my life because I can’t accept it. The better I become at surrender and acceptance, the more I experience serenity. After a long enough time I realize I’ve had a spiritual awakening. Now I am peace / joy / love.

☮️ 😊❤️

likesmart

My husband is an alcoholic and it’s getting worse with the holidays. He’s started every day drinking high alcohol-content IPAs as early as 8am. And he drinks them all day and all night like soda. He did AA when he was younger but is now vehemently against it. He is high-functioning. Has a PhD from MIT and works for a venture capitalist firm. I wondered how he gets through the day, but he started to come home early (mid-afternoon) and immediately open a beer while working. What should I do?

like

I’m sober curious. I’m also about to help a new non-alcoholic spirit company with their launch.
I have a question for people in recovery. If a brand were to contend that sobriety is a spectrum, or allow for that to a least be part of the conversation, how does that make you feel? Are other brands doing a good job of being inclusive of people who are truly sober?
(I get that NA drinks / spirits can be triggering for people in recovery)
Thank you.

like

Does anyone have recommendations for non-alcoholic drinks? I have been having soda with lime at happy hours, but also just found Athletic Beer that is n/a as an option. I’m tired of temptation and upturned or confused looks. Also, just have felt so much better not drinking and not going down a spiral - really want to keep things that way.

likesmart

Pains me to write this, but I am addicted to cannabis. I have finally decided to admit it. It's a gross feeling. I absolutely hate the effects after only 30 minutes, don't know why I keep doing it over and over again.

like

Welcome to the Addiction & Sobriety bowl! This is not a bowl to make diagnoses or give advice; this is a place to answer questions from those who still suffer and for those in recovery to share hope.

like

Hi. So grateful for this bowl! I’m 16 months sober. Fairly new to ACN just curious what types of challenges you’ve faced and how you’ve overcome them?

like

Is there anyone here that’s a creative in advertising, and also in AA? I’m in the midst of the steps, and having a hard time making time for meeting commitments etc. with the time consuming and unpredictable way advertising tends to be. Any suggestions or similar experiences?

like

I’ve been sober for over 2 months! Feeling great about it. However, heading to an all inclusive resort tomorrow. I’ll be tempted however know that how I’m feeling now is much better than the temporary enjoyment and subsequent pain and suffering alcohol brings.

like
like

My boyfriend of a year got a DUI this weekend and has had drinking problems in the past. He fully admits he is an alcoholic, and will do therapy/go to AA moving forward. My therapist suggested I be a “computer program running in the background” and essentially leave him to allow him to work on himself. This is obviously a really hard decision, and I feel like I should listen to my therapist, but my heart is pulling me the other way. Anyone else been through something similar or have advice?

like

I quit drinking at the first of the year because I was drinking too much as a way to cope with Covid. 99.9% of the time, I’m glad I quit drinking. And then there are those nights when I just want a glass of something to take the edge off, which makes me think alcohol was more of a coping mechanism than I thought and it’s probably a good thing I’m not drinking. I don’t even like wine very much, but I miss that low level buzz that makes everything a little less loud.

like

Facing a tricky situation and never dealt with this stuff before 🙃 - I generally dont smoke/drink, its seen as taboo in our culture and our household. I have a younger sibling who just finished college this week. I know he ocassionally consumes alcohol which tbh not too surprised/worried abt. Recently heard from one of his friends that they are worried about his smoking habit and was totally blind sided. Apparently its been going on for 2 months and he recently upped it to twice a day..(cont)

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal