{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "So last couple of years have been very tough for me, ending a 6yr LTR, ex getting married overnight, dating horrors, losing 40lbs, intense family issues, covid, major housing crisis, etc etc.\n\nI realized I've given up hope and become insanely negative. Last night had a break down and decided I'm gonna reboot again.\n\n Just looking for tips to keep this motivation going.", "post_id": "61ae3eb01111e7003d55df8f", "reply_count": 7, "vote_count": 3, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

So last couple of years have been very tough for me, ending a 6yr LTR, ex getting married overnight, dating horrors, losing 40lbs, intense family issues, covid, major housing crisis, etc etc. I realized I've given up hope and become insanely negative. Last night had a break down and decided I'm gonna reboot again. Just looking for tips to keep this motivation going.

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Any time a million negative things happen, you know you can only go up. My story: boyfriend of 10 years cheated on me for the last year of our relationship - the woman lived a few blocks away with a husband and two kids and worked at my workplace (I did not know her). He broke up w ME for good on my 30th birthday while were on a healing trip in a tropical place. I made a decision that day not to take him back anymore. It took everything I had. One month later, I took the GMATs and scored 700+, 4 months later I got into the M7 b-school of my choice, 6 months later, I met my now husband, ~5 years later, I had my son, ~6 years later, I am working at the job of my dreams, living a surreal life in the suburbs. I’ve never been happier. I had to reach the bottom to get here (also- 20 lbs of unwanted weight loss from not eating ; I changed that narrative to me looking fabulous and working out and eating nutritiously thereafter to be at the healthiest weight I’ve ever been in my life). Along the way, internship rejections in b-school, almost “failing” out to making the deans list, no offer at the end of my internship to getting an even better full time offer post school. Up and down, up and down. And here I am. Life will only get better for you. Hugs. ❤️

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Everything that anyone experiences has a negative and a positive side. Negative may be the experience itself, positive may be the kind of things that loss and grief teach you, as invaluable lessons on how to cherish life and discern what you need and align your life with your values. I’ve also struggled a lot in the past few years (losing a parent, losing family friends, feeling estranged from my communities, sick family members, etc) and I’m turning things around right now as well. It’s hard work. I need weekly therapy with a great therapist and incredibly supportive family and friends to make it work. It’s possible. It’s often hard. It’s a test of your faith in yourself and the world. Keep track of the ups and downs. Journal and reflect in cycles (I really love astrology for the reflection prompts, because regardless of how you feel about astro, all of the reflection is worth completing regularly). Find some way to make sense of the highs and lows, and you’ll have the key to keeping perspective at all times. Good luck!! You’ve got this 💙

likeuplifting

I'm sorry the last couple years have been especially hard on you, but you know you want to make changes to improve your life and you absolutely CAN do this! Consider a bullet journal or other form of accountability to help you track your progress and keep momentum going. When you're feeling low, it's nice to be able to look back on how far you've come.

I do that too sometimes, but you're completely right that no amount of regret or thought can change the past. I think creating a habit tracker and an "undo list" of the things you want to decrease or stop doing entirely could really help you with progress and momentum.

The first sentence you acknowledge that this phase has been tough! Which is great by itself cause you are Cognizant of the issue and it’s difficulty. - pls remember what is in control is only you and how you react to situations - we can be sympathetic and play victim - dwell in that space or take action and decide to be happy - prioritize your issues , the ones in ur control and the rest can be parked away as it’s not in your control - first ensure your mental well being is right which will automatically reflect in your thoughts, health and actions - pls surround yourself with positive and helpful ppl/resources! Nothing is forever ( both happiness n sadness ) - YOU got this!!

The future is bright. You are resilient and more brave than you know. You have awareness and reflection, healing takes time and sometimes shows up as a “break down”, but you’re slowly releasing your pain. Keep at it, worth through it, it’s only up from here! Btw for self help and relationship advice, Jillian Turecki on Instagram has some of the best videos and posts, she has a very calming presence and explain things so well.

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