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null

So, this is a first! Chief Diversity Officer at my client has “Preferred Pronouns” in ‘her’ signature. I’m 😱 has anyone seen this before?!

likeupliftingsmarthelpfulfunny
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Let me write out my personal story to explain why this is actually important to some of us.

I was born female but have dealt with body dysmorphia since I was pretty young. I never dealt like I fit in with girls and fit in slightly more with boys but I still was not the same. As I grew up I started hurting myself because I didn’t feel like I belonged and I hated the body I was in. I started binding my breasts with ACE bandages (which is awful for you long term) because I would look at them in the mirror and truly feel like they didn’t belong on my body. I was also assaulted multiple times in my home town as things were said to me like “sex with me will get rid of the gay/tranny” or “you want to be a boy so I will fight you like a boy”.

I can’t imagine being a man either because first of all I do not want a penis. I also do not identify with everything men are supposed to be. I enjoy certain components of being feminine and certain parts of being masculine. When someone calls me either she or he my skin crawls because I do not fit into either of those buckets.

My boyfriend was also born intersex (yes intersex people actually do exist and are not just legends and statistics). He does identify as a man but many people in his community do not identify as a man or a woman. Even though he identifies as a man, he has much larger breasts than most men would have due to his hormones being at different levels. People will think he is a very butch woman pretty regularly.

If it was normal to put our pronouns in our signature it would help some of us out a lot. Also the they/them pronouns as a singular pronoun is definitely important to some of us and does cause real problems for us. I will not say there are not more important issues in the world but this is a simple thing so why can’t we try and just allow society to progress?

likeupliftinghelpful

@EY2 Yeah!

So when we talk about "gender," we're talking about categorizations society creates for people largely based on groupings of masculine and feminine traits. If that's not the definition you would assign to gender, that's ok; feel free to use a word that makes you comfortable. Just tell me what it means beforehand :) But that's how I am defining "gender."

This answer might be slightly controversial so excuse me for being a bad ally, but the short answer is that, since gender is a social construct, there are as many genders as society is willing to recognize. In the Western world, we typically recognize two distinct genders and then we have a "non-binary" bucket where we throw everyone else who doesn't fit neatly into the other two. So in your consultant MECE world, if you really want an answer just to feel comfortable, the magic number is 3: men, women, and non-binary. At the very least, I think it's hard to deny that some people simply don't fit into "men" or "women."

That said, there are of course people within that non-binary bucket (and arguably the more established buckets too) who identify with certain other gender identities (none of which are "dragon"). And theoretically, the number of these identities could be infinite because there are countless ways to define and group masculine and feminine characteristics; however, I'd be hesitant to state a number until our laws, language, etc. (i.e. culture) reflect that.

likeuplifting
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I like it! I’d much rather refer to people by their correct pronouns instead of making an assumption

likeupliftingsmart

When a company's financials aren't very strong, I wonder which C suite will be the first to go?

likefunnyupliftingsmart

Preferred pronouns are to the chief diversity officer as Power Point slides are to the consultant

likefunny

We’re too damn PC nowadays. I’ll identify as a chair tomorrow

likefunny

@senioranalyst1 call yourself an asshole. It’s more accurate. How’s that for pc?

likefunnyupliftingsmarthelpful

A few years ago I would think it’s too far but everyone’s entitled to be referred to how they feel is correct and respectful. I can appreciate someone being upfront about it vs getting angry that heir gender was assumed.

like

I haven’t seen it before but, as a cis gay man, it makes me very happy. Progress and inclusion come one step at a time.

likeuplifting

I deserve to be referred to as Your Highness.

likefunny

The world has too many real problems to worry about stuff like this

likesmart

This thread basicslly explains why Trump won.

likeupliftingfunny

I think this is amazing If I was in a culture where this was normal I would definitely put they/them in my signature but it is not something I can do in my industry without having issues.

likehelpful

Wow there is so much hate here. Thought we've come a little farther. "Unnecessary bullshit"? Just because you're not going through a gender identity crisis doesn't mean you should trivialize those who are.

likefunny

I prefer not having to do actual work, so please avoid referring to me in any capacity 🤷🏻‍♂️

likefunnyhelpful

Here we go complicating things unnecessarily. So in addition to remembering your name, I'm expected to care about "preferred" pronouns for the thousands of people I'll meet?? Instead of referring to you as the very obvious species you are, & exercising my brain cells on more important things?

likehelpful

I think it's great and if she's a cis straight female she might be doing it to encourage others. As for all those that say it's bullshit or too complicated you should be ashamed of yourselves. Try living a life where people place unnecessary assumptions and expectations on you because of how you look. And if it's too complicated to remember to call someone by how they want to be called you're neither very kind nor very clever.

likeuplifting

D2: “her, she”. It’s pretty straightforward and redundant to me. But my aha moment was the realization that one should not assume (in general)

likeupliftingsmart

M1 probably the CFO seeing as how the financials are in their purview 🙄

like

I actually think it would be helpful even with e
people who aren't transgender. Sometimes there s someone you haven't met with a name like Blake or Pat and if you've never seen them you have no clue.

like

It’s all stupid bullshit

likefunny

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