Thinking about sending our son who JUST turned 2 to daycare. The school would be able to put him into a 1-2 classroom right away, which means he would be with a couple of 2 year olds as well as several 12-18 month olds. We are concerned that our 2 yo, who cries frequently and has started throwing large daily tantrums, will be “learning” from the 1 year olds that this is appropriate behavior and/or will progress less if he’s not with peers his age and slightly older. Are we wrong to think this?

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I think you might be over thinking daycare. They usually group kids 1-2 together. Honestly I feel like my little guy didn’t really throw tantrums until 2 😅

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Interesting. Okay good to know.

As a parent of a 7 yo and 5 yo that were in daycare from infancy, I wouldn’t be worried about this at all. Some 2 year olds just throw tantrums and the behavior the other children model is not going to effect it at that age. My older child almost never had a tantrum in his life. My younger child was constant with tantrums from two to three years old.

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Agree- you're overthinking it. He will be fine.

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Our daycare (national chain) is still combining classes due to teacher shortage, so when my kid started at 18 months, she was in a group of 4 other kids ranging from 14 months to 2.5. From the pictures it seemed all of them got along well and learn from each other.

You might be overthinking the tantrums, kids tend to behave more poorly when they’re in a safe space (usually I get the tantrums and everyone else gets my sweet, smiley toddler)

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He’ll be fine. But do find out what the progression is - when he’d move up to each subsequent classroom.

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I would try to get him in a class with 24-36 month olds if he has good fine and gross motor skills and is solidly verbal. We moved my older child up to the “Twos” class at 20 months because he was bored out of his mind being with 12-18 month olds. It’s a much better fit for him.

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Crying when we told him we needed to get ready to go to school or leave the house, crying at drop-off, observing that the non-walkers closer to 12 months were getting more attention than my very verbal, very physical kid (not the staff’s fault, I get that the non-walkers require more aid). We moved him for a variety of reasons (showing interest in potty training, showing signs of early reading, was saying 150+ words, is in the 95th percentile for height and weight so was literally twice the size of many of the 12 month-ers in the 1 year old class.

He was hesitant for probably 2-3 days in the new class but now runs to the door to leave the house in the morning and barely says bye to us when we get to his classroom.

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Wouldn’t worry that he’s going to be held back by the younger babes. Just the socialization and exposure to a routine outside of your home will likely result in him growing leaps and bounds. Particularly if there are some kids his own age. Most daycares in our area combine 1s + 2s so that is not unusual. Also in both my boys’ experience they both learned to be better at things like sharing and helping others by being around younger kids who hadn’t developed the skills they had yet. You’d be surprised how quickly they recognize that they are “past” the baby stage themselves.

Also FWIW last year our son was only 1 of 2 four year olds in a combined pre and 3K class due to it being our best option given chaos caused by the pandemic. I was worried it would hold him back but he was fine both from an academic and social perspective when it came time to head to K. All this to say, if the caretakers are good and making an effort to meet your child where they are, all will be well!

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It's odd they don't have a separate classroom. Our daycare has a Toddler room and a Two's room. Is this a smaller daycare?

Actually no, it looked large and services infants through 5 year olds. We haven’t enrolled yet but decided to check it out and that’s what we learned.

I would be more interested in how the teachers react and handle those tantrums.

Me too! It might be good for them to nip it in the bud.

I feel like that’s pretty normal, to group the toddlers together. I don’t think either of my kids picked up bad habits from children who were slightly younger than them.

If you had a choice to send your kid who just turned 2, to a 1-2s or a 2-3s, which one would you send your kid to?

2-3s if they’re self-assured and verbally and physically on track, for sure.

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