This is how my day started. I come in this morning and the first thing my boss says to me is how when he hired me he didnt think I was beautiful. He was glad for that since no one would accuse him of hiring me for my looks. But now Im beautiful and that means trouble for him so he should fire me for that. I’m like oh you’re gonna fire me bc of my looks, interesting.

I’m literally cringing over this and I’m honestly just angry/upset/annoyed. Took all of me not to walk out.

likesmart
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

This is NOT ok. Sorry you are dealing with this. I agree — document and report!

like

Agreed with the folks above about documenting, but would add — to me, this is egregious enough and sensitive enough that I also think you should consult with a lawyer, immediately. This goes well beyond “microaggressions or sexism we report to HR.” I’m so, so sorry this happened to you. This is horrible and totally unfair. Hope you’re okay and please be kind to yourself.

likesmart
Recent IconRecent

Tell HR. Document everything. Also I’m so sorry.

like

What a bizarre series of wildly inappropriate comments masquerading as backhanded compliments.

Serious question: is your boss by chance on the spectrum?

like

Literally was about to ask the same thing

Reminds me of a time 30 years ago when my solo practitioner boss asked me to have sex with him. I was smart enough to tell him that was disgusting to ask (while I played it off as a joke), but I was too young and naïve to file any kind of complaint against him with either the bar or the courts. It was still very much a legal man’s world at the time, and I was afraid to make waves in the community where many lawyers knew each other and I did not want to tag myself as someone others might be afraid to hire. I have always regretted that decision. In my next firm a few years later, when a partner said something sexual and inappropriate, I immediately went to those in charge (all men at the time), and they were horrified and completely backed me up. I actually don’t think I’ve ever seen them that angry before. I wanted to make sure that it never happened again to any other young women. It never did - and I know because I am now one of the owners of the firm! My point in sharing my story is to encourage all women to come forward when someone senior crosses boundaries.  there is tremendous support in the legal community to try to stop these dirtbags.

likeupliftingsmart

Agree 1000% . As an owner, I'd want to know this is going on and end it. For the individual as well as the silent others it's likely happened to since this is rarely a one off.

like

Thank you all for the feedback, the comments, the advice, and the story sharing. This is not the first time this has happened, but it is the first time I have been unable to let it go. I think so often we are taught to just let it go. And that’s not ok either. I fully intend to say something, and then to move onto another job.

like

Good, your boss is classless and rude. No one deserves this.

like

What the actual F....get out of there, OP!

like

Agree he sounds mega creepy and inappropriate!

like

I’m so 😢 sorry. It amazes me how many people in the legal profession are either this clueless or this brazen.

like

EEEEEEWWWWW. Tell other people you work with BEFORE going to HR. This is the key. You need other people to know. Remember, HR isn't there for your benefit, they are there for the firm. The only way to protect yourself is to tell other people you work with who you trust. I also recommend talking to a friend in employment law if you have one. they can help guide you. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I had an attorney tell me to blow him this year and I went through the HR "investigation process". I had told my assistant and another female attorney before I talked to HR and it was the absolute right move.

likesmart

Document everything. Put it in an email to HR. Then give HR a call informing them that you’ve sent an email. Then follow up on your email saying that you’ve confirmed that they received the email via a call. This is outrageous

like

Eewww this is not OK! Sorry this happened to you OP

like

Woooow. No. Unacceptable. I agree. Document, report. And start looking for a new job.

like

When you find another job and give notice, be sure to tell him that you would have stayed, but you don’t think he’s beautiful enough for that.

like

HR

like

Ew

like

100% report. New job. WTAF. I’m sorry that you have to be the person to educate him re: lawful workplace conduct.

like

Perv.....

like

R U N

Don’t know size of your firm and HR but if you can and feel comfortable I would urge directly bringing it up with the guy so he can hear directly from you that is was not appreciated and not acceptable. Then follow up with brief email to document. I know that can be hard or impossible given power dynamics at work. The law on harassment is stacked for employers in many jurisdictions where even when friends and peers see something so inappropriate a court may not find it unlawful (assuming you were fired or demoted or felt the enviro was hostile to have a claim arise). Plus he might grovel and cower or apologize which he should do.

This sounds super gross and weird. New job time!

Related Posts

We’re looking for a Talent Acquisition - Partner Recruiter for our Boston office. Prior experience in exec level recruiting needed. DM discuss a potential referral 👍

like

I am planning to have kids in the next 4 years and currently work in an industry role. I’ve been looking into management consulting to gain additional experience at a fast pace before I decide to have kids. Does anyone have any thoughts or opinions on this topic?

like
like

I am a CISA qualified professional with 10 years of exp in Technology Risk Advisory & Consulting currently working in Deloitte. Looking for a job in the United States. Please let me know if there is a any opening. Thanks in advance.

like

Hello fishes 🐠🐋🐟,

Please help me out here.... Your input will be really great.

I have herd that currently most of the companies are in hiring freeze. (Holiday season, recession or layoffs).

I am trying to apply job for many companies since last month, and i haven't got any response from any of them.

Are there any Organizations still out there who are hiring/open for referral and are in position to handle recession.

Please comment your thoughts. It might make someone's day.

Thanks.

like

EY GDS is hiring
DM me with requisition id
Will share the JD
Deloitte McKinsey & Company Publicis Sapient PwC KPMG Boston Consulting Group

Post Photo
like

Impetus is hiring for Positions 2yr -15yr

Cloud data engineer

AWS Data Engineer

AWS Data Architect

Azure Data Architect

Lead Software Engineer

Azure Data Engineer

Technical Architect / Associate Architect

Lead Software Engineer

Module Lead Software Engineer

Teradata Architect

Positions

SQL Developers

Big Data Engineers


Location : remote / banglore/ noida/ pune / indore / ahemdabad


Interested ?
Comment below

like

Networking question here. A retired partner at the firm I used to work out reached out to me recently about attending an afternoon during the week (b4 4/30) with one of his long time clients. The partner and I have kept in touch since I joined my new firm and I feel like his invitation is a great networking opportunity since the client (who I have worked with before) is on a number of boards. Torn as how to request off as an S3. Could materialize to nothing but could be good for reconnecting.

like

Would love to work towards “Chief Culture Officer” - focusing mostly on the employee experience.

Acknowledging it’s not super common - what does this role pay? (Boston based)

like

Hi, is there any opening in abap for 0-1 yrs experience in capgemini???

like

Does anyone have experience working at Spring Health? I am considering moving into a Director of Strategic Alliances role and have heard concerns around a toxic work environment…

like

Wasserman is currently hiring for a ton of roles. If you see something you are interested in, please let me know. Happy to provide insight.

like

Hi Fishes, I need a referral for UI/UX position in Adobe.
YOE: 4

Can someone please help with the referral? Thanks in advance!

Adobe

like

Larsen & Toubro Infotech I’m looking for fullstack developer role.
Skills: Angular,Node.js , MS SQL , AWS Larsen & Toubro Infotech kindly refer. YOE: 3 years

like

EisnerAmper RESIG staff 1 (fund accounting) vs big 4 international tax

thoughts? not too knowledgeable on fund accounting/exit opportunities/ etc

mostly concerned about work and career/salary progression

asking for a friend

like

Hello everyone! I am a Judicial Law Clerk, which I have been for a little over two years now. However, I’m planning on moving into the AML/Compliance realm. I have a background in finance, having been a Finance Disbursing Officer in the Army for 6 years with one deployment in that role. Additionally, I am currently a JAG attorney and studying for my CAMS, hoping to take that exam in the next month or two. Any advice or referrals for anyone I can talk to learn more about the field? Thanks! :)

like

Can someone refer me for QA role(Automation+Functional).
6.5 yrs experience
Selenium with java, API and functional testing

like

How is the Work liife balance and hike for Oracle SSI for Oracle Fusion Consulting role?

Hey got a question for anyone and everyone! My sister is looking for a job. She’s been out of the job market for a while (5 years) to be a stay at home mom and with the economy, is looking to get back in it. My job isn’t hiring. Qualifications in comments

like

More Posts

Can some one refer me for finance transformation role at Deloitte?

like

I feel so special when people add me to their close friends list on Instagram

likefunnyuplifting

Hiring for a product analyst role at Square - please DM me if interested!

likehelpful

Thought this seemed appropriate for this group. I appreciate the calm and support this group provides from the daily life of the grind. Nice to know I'm not alone.

Post Photo
likeupliftinghelpful

I posted in another group but not many responses, thought I’d try here!

Post Photo
like

How is the Pay Structure with LTI. Is the Fixed Pay inclusive of employee pf employer pf, medical and gratuity.

Or are these components paid separately.

Also what will be the PF , will it be 12% of base or 1800 fixed PF ?

I might get an offer of 30LPA fixed + Variables. Can we expect 100% variable as well ?

Larsen & Toubro LNT

like

How is service line consulting in Deloitte India (not USI), is it only applicable for Indian clients? Has anyone joined recently? Faced any issue with Work life balance ?
Deloitte Deloitte India Deloitte USI PwC EY

How many stoolies do we have on here? #vivalastool

like

How do you set your career on an upward trajectory in growth start up companies where experience and historical titles are not correlated? How do you gain influence as someone without a fancy title but plenty of contributions (which is thankfully noticed)?

like

How do you manage keeping track of and responding to teams chats and emails in a timely manner? I have a hard time addressing chats when I am focused on something else, because I know it will completely derail me. But then I forgot to circle back to the chat when I’m done and I’ve recently been told that my response time is unacceptable and needs to improve, but I’m truly unsure how to improve.

like

Favorite Non-Fiction captivating podcast?

like

What is the "expiration date" on having to wish someone happy new year, even if you haven't seen them yet in January?

like

Alright which one of you said gdrx is a good play? You owe me money 😤

funny

Longest dry spell? Single people only!

like

Dumb question but heard this from someone wanting to confirm (feels untrue) but if Deloitte sponsors you do you not have to take the GMAT/GRE?

like

Best way to ship someone liquor as a gift?

Am I the only one frustrated w what’s going on w the state and what’s been taken away. It’s as if I’m taking home less than I did 5 years ago and on paper I’m technically making more. It’s sad.

like

Looking to sublease my studio near Lincoln Center. It’s in a luxury doorman building with top amenities, modern kitchen (separate from the bedroom), and in-unit laundry. The location is great: close to 2 subway stations (A, C, B, D, and 1 lines), 10 minutes walk to Central Park, 5 minutes walk to the Riverside Park, supermarket is in the corner. My lease is up to the mid of Mar’22. I love the building and just move for personal reason. I can send you pictures over. The monthly rent is $2,200.

like

Messaging a guy on a dating app - I’m most interested in him out of the ones I’m talking to and have been replying back the same day, but he’s been taking 2-3 days to respond every time…take it as a sign that he’s not very interested, or keep pursuing?

like

Additional Posts in Women in Law

I have been looking for a job since the end of March. I keep seeing folks getting hired and wonder what am I doing wrong? Or any suggestions on how to increase my chances of getting hired? Thanks

like

Hugel sale on jcrew site if anyone is looking for some deals :) 70% off sale items with 3 or more items purchased. I went a little nuts!!!

like

I hung out this weekend with a work friend of mine. We’re both junior, but I’ve been on FMLA due to an unexpected illness so have been away for a bit. I know that I screwed up on some files before I was diagnosed which I feel awful about and have been trying to rectify (unpaid), but she spent a lot of time cataloguing the ways in which I messed up. It was supposed to be a nice weekend for once and I’m feeling more beat down than ever 😕 just not sure how to get the motivation/nerve to go back!

like

Seeking advise for my first solo jury trial coming up. What are some things you wish you would have known?

Type: Civil litigation contract dispute. I’m defense.

like

In your experience, how accurate has the Robert Half Salary Guide been? Small law in LCOL area. Fourth year associate trying to figure out appropriate salary range. I’ve heard the 1/3 of your billable time value as well? Any guidance appreciated.

like

My husband & I are relocating to be closer to family next year. I always assumed I’d stay in my current role until the move, but things at work have become horribly toxic. I can’t stay in this environment for 10 more months. I’ve thought about trying to find a job in the new state that might let me start remote…but that feels like such a long shot. Any other recs? I’m feeling really hopeless & trapped recently.

like

Took my first vacation (1 week) in over a year to visit family. Was bombarded by emails from one partner asking me to complete non-time sensitive motions, which he hasn’t even bothered to review. This is my third firm in three years (first I left as I was severely underpaid, second I left for a 100k increase in salary), but this lack of respect for my boundaries has made me want to move again once I’ve completed 18 mos. Bad? They don’t do this to the other associates (all male).

like

Had a talk with the partners Thursday, they said I’m not producing enough work at the end of each day. First year associate, new area of law, wfh so they are more “what are you doing every second”. They want me to start turning in a daily log (we are plaintiffs attorneys so no billing normally) any advice? While I appreciate their honesty, I feel like they consider me severely indebted to them that they hired me mid pandemic and “allow” me to work from home.

like

Any advice for healthier eating, or eating in general, when dealing with a particularly stressful time? I struggle with inflammatory stomach issues as it is, and the stress has been piling up and making it much worse lately - I’m either nauseous or have no appetite (or both). Decided to take the time to make one of my favourite (healthy and vegetarian) meals tonight and it was just not appealing at all 🥲 I don’t think I’ve had a proper meal in a week and I feel terrible.

like

How honest is too honest in an exit interview? I am leaving because of problems with one partner in particular but I do not want to burn a bridge in case I ever need the firm in the future.

like

Discovered major pay difference between myself and two new male hires with equal experience. Asked for a raise and was shot down due to Covid and essentially told they make more (were talking a 30k) bc they don’t have my “other responsibilities” aKa my two kids. I know my productivity is effected by parental responsibility but I don’t feel that alone justifies the difference. I know our billable output isn’t drastically different. Not sure what my next steps should be and welcome any advice.

like

I quit. I was respectful. Thankfully, every person I have told has been so nice, and I wasn't immediately bounced out by my leadership (which has happened), but I have been surprised by my own bittersweet tears. If they actually cared, why didn't they say so sooner? I gave so much, and I was consumed by this organization. I invested in them, but my investment and dedication were not reciprocated, which is why I ever even entertained leaving. I don't know why it hurts, but it really, really does.

likehelpful

If you refuse to share salary info with fellow women lawyers, especially while benefitting from them sharing with you, you’re part of the problem.

like

For the past 6+ months, I've been thinking of getting an LV neverful MM for work, but I was wondering if anyone has a Valentino rockstud or the YSL shopping tote? Is the neverfull the best option for work (and carryon travel)?

like

Anyone have a MIL who is clearly intimidated by your prof success and consistently criticized how much you work and how you’re raising your little one?

likehelpful

For working “new parents”: gift ideas, please.

like

So I posted a bit ago about getting IV hydration and vitamins. You guys gave me the courage to try it. After I had it done, I didn't feel much of a difference and figured I just spent a bunch of $ to relax for an hour in a massage chair. 🤷🏼‍♀️ But this has been the best week I've had energy-wise in the last seven months. And I kind of wish I could post before/after pics because apparently I was very bloated. I've been focusing on keeping up with my hydration at home. Thx ladies!

likehelpful

I’ve never taken a gap year and I really want to take a 6-12 month break from work before I get married/start a family. I’m currently two years qualified at an international firm. Is it difficult to find a job again after a career gap in London?

like

Does anybody find it helps to “get ready” in the mornings with wfh? I still want to be comfortable with athleisure, but I’m wondering if fixing my hair and maybe a little makeup will make a difference mentally. Feeling so burnt out and unmotivated lately.

like

I was fired last month after a short time at the company. I knew things weren't going well- it was a terrible culture fit & I was also planning my exit strategy. They wouldn't give me specific reasons other than to vaguely say it was performance related. I agree I made a few dumb mistakes (none of any dire consequence) but what kills me is that I tried really hard. I don't want to change careers but I have a deep seeded fear that no matter how hard I try, I will never be a "good attorney".

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal