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Highly recommend you come up with a list of must haves (ie, exterior all brick, single step into the house from front & side doors, pre-wire for whole house audio system, etc). Look through magazines for suggestions & tear out pics.
When I built my house, I had an Excel workbook containing page for whole house req, paint colors for each room, sink fixtures, flooring, etc.
I carried a 72-pound suitcase containing samples plus the blueprints whenever I went to discuss the house.
Meet with experts to learn about info. It’s ok to purchase from somewhere else should you find a better price.
Set expectations with builder to meet weekly to discuss what’s coming up for the following week.
I am not very handy so I definitely would leave it to a builder.
Are you good at making decisions or do you hem and haw? Building requires countless decisions and without discipline will impact timeline and/or budgets.
Pro
Omg it’s so much harder and more expensive than you think. This is why we have low housing inventory.
Hire a designer to simplify your life. If you have kids and/or big family - two dishwashers (and maybe clothes washers) is a godsend.