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If he gave up on you and was never 100% in, then he’s not the one! Even if it’s still painful, hopefully it’s at least comforting to know that there is someone better for you out there who will be 100% in - and not being with your ex is going to allow you to find that person. One day you’ll look back and this pain won’t be there anymore. Just keep an open mind and when you least expect it that someone will enter into your life.
Pro
I think one of the reasons why you may not be over it is that you are still holding on the idea of your ex — not your ex. And I think that is harder to let go than the actual person.
If he wasn’t into you, I doubt that’s the relationship you really wanted. You probably like some of the things he did, how he acted or the values he had, the potential he has as a boyfriend.
That’s fine. But you have to now let go of HIM, and look for guys who have those qualities.
Thank you D1
A decade or so ago when I was apart from my ex I tended to accentuate the positive and gloss over (or forget) the bad stuff. The I met my future wife and my ex became a distant memory. I still shudder to this day thinking me and my ex could have gotten married—-and I would have never experienced the amazing person that is my wife.
So don’t settle. You deserve more than a boyfriend who really wasn’t into you. Good luck.
Thank you this is heartwarming
Hey. Things take time. Take your time. Go ahead and cry and scream or whatever. Breakups are shit. But don’t stop living. Meanwhile go have yourself some fun. Safely of course (Covid is real). Go for the guys that are the exact opposite of your ex. In every way. Don’t overthink it. Just do it. I got divorced and in one year I had zillions off dates. Not a single one of the, like my ex. Every color of the rainbow. Every height. Every age. Every nationality (one who really did not speak any English and he was one of my favorites) My most fun one was 10 years younger and that was like reliving my college years!! It all got my mind off my ex. I didn’t date any one for too long. Wanted to just keep it light and fluffy and keep moving on. A few were really bad dates but even those were OK because I learned something more about different types of men. And the best part was I never cried over a single one of these guys asses and mostly had story after story to laugh with my friends about. And laughing is the best medicine. And it sure the hell beats crying. Wouldn’t trade those crazy misfit dates for the world. It got me the next level of then being able to date more seriously and selectively.
I'm so happy this happened D2, this is heartwarming
Think about it this way - do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? It’s so much better when you’re both in love! And once you find that, you are going to wonder why it took you so long to get over your ex. Good luck!