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Which one I should join, CGI or Infosys
I started lowballing and it’s working
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Pls DM if interested
Who’s in Texas🤠? M/F? Age?
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Aaron Judge is sexy.
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Body bounces back faster the younger you are. Travel ASAP. Have a kid at 30, next at 34. Then travel more once they are either 6 months old, or after 6 years old.
That’s how I’d redo my choices.
Enthusiast
Kids don’t have to stop you from traveling.
Enthusiast
No but they have influence on how often and where.
Visual Storyteller
Yeah, where you want to be coming to advice for family and medical planning is the Fishbowl Confessions group. Makes sense.
Also, you're fine having kids over 30.
Conversation Starter
And S1- I’ve never spoken to you before, I just saw your reaction to somebody else, that’s all.
My wife had our daughter when she was 44 years ago. Totally healthy. No issues.
Yeah, healthy geriatric pregnancies are the exception, not the rule. And they usually require lots of money and discomfort. That's why I don't think we should recommend that women should wait until their 30s if they want kids.
My mom had 2 still-borns at 33 and 34. Then had my sister (who is paralyzed from the waist down) at 35 and then me (who has rare complications) at 37. All her babies in her 20s were completely healthy.
Read the risks yourself. From down syndrome to autism, risks go up a lot after 30.
^ this one doesn’t necessarily suggest increases actually. It also links a bunch of other studies.
Rising Star
As a preface, both kids and travel (especially travel) is highly overrated.
Logically, travel usually goes first, but if you can't afford it right now, why miss out on having children?
I want to buy a yacht, but I'm not going to use that to hold me back from having kids - even if that'll technically help me save up faster.
Honestly I agree travel becomes overrated when people overdo it. It’s not like you suddenly can’t travel after kids. It takes more planning/budgeting but people act like the second you give birth you’re stuck on house arrest until the last one goes to college.
I vote for kids young & just do as much travel the year prior / while pregnant. I’m so tired and in pain and had my first at 27-28 (who can remember) I’m 32 now (I think). It’s better to be able to get off the floor when you have kids :) At 32 my knees hurt already, my back, everything. I slept on the floor for 15 min with my 2 yr old two nights ago and my neck has been killing me ever since. I’d never want to do this older.
Enthusiast
Traveling while pregnant is not a guarantee. You don’t know what issues you’ll run into. Tons of doctors appointments, first trimester awfulness, last trimester hugeness, complications, bed rest, etc. My friend just came back from a baby moon to Europe 2 weeks ago and had a baby 11 weeks early all of a sudden. She’s super healthy , always fit, and 34. It happened out of nowhere with no warning signs.
Good to keep in mind you can always arrange for family to watch your kids and you travel. But you can’t always time when you’ll get pregnant. Some people try for years and it doesn’t work out. It’s much easier to be a younger parent than older.
Enthusiast
I feel like most people can’t afford to travel much once they have kids. My one friend pays 2k / month for daycare. Insane
I think the first thing you should do is get your fertility checked. Your partner as well. Men’s fertility gets worse with age as well.
But regardless of those results, plan a trip ASAP.
Had my kids at 31 and 33. Pregnancy is not considered geriatric until 35. They won’t consider you high risk or give you any extra monitoring based on age being a risk factor unless you’re birthing at 35.
Spent my 30th birthday with my husband in Portugal!
30 isn’t a magical switch when biology turns against you. There’s no difference really between being 29 and the day you turn 30. People tend to be alarmists about this stuff, but the risks increase gradually over time, not all at once. I think 35 is quoted as the age it starts to get more significantly dicey
Have you actually spoken to a fertility doctor to get a professional recommendation based on your unique body and circumstances or are you making your family planning decisions based on fear mongering stereotypes?
Conversation Starter
I’d say go for travel - if you feel that you’re worried about the health concerns brought up by others here: consider freezing your eggs. Other than that I would advocate for your travel and enjoy your life! Going on spontaneous trips can be a hassle when you have two kids and might not as fun as you were solo or with S/O.
You know people do both right? I have been to Hawaii, the Caribbean, the UK and many states in between since having kids….I also traveled before kids (France, Amsterdam, Japan, Korea, Canada and more) and I travel with my kids. I’m currently planning a spring break trip. Having kids isn’t a life ender.
Pro
98% of this commentary is bizarre at best, idiotic at worst 🙄. In my opinion, this is what it boils down to: what do YOU want to do? Right. Now. Tomorrow?
That being said, if you are concerned from a medical perspective, book that appoint and find out exactly what your fertility journey looks like now and what it will likely look like in the future! There is no one in the world who can tell you what’s what aside from a qualified doctor- no matter how many statistics are thrown at you.
I’ve seen the world, it’s not going anywhere. Your fertility is though ⏰…
Enthusiast
35 here. No kids. Married, though. Lol and even my husband is hanging by a thread.
Enthusiast
I am a stepmom too but I’ve only seen my husband’s 17 year old son like 4 times in the 7 years we’ve been together. If he had any kind of custody when we were dating, I wouldn’t have moved forward with the relationship. I was a full time stepmom in my previous marriage and it was miserable. The kids were great but the rewardless sacrifices and being treated like the help and a second class citizen in my own home sucked. In my early 20s I went on a cruise every year. When I got married to him at 25, no one else would watch the kids- not even their mom who was very much alive and well so we had to cancel. Never again. I got into this second marriage thinking I wanted kids of my own but as it turned out…I don’t. And the older I get, the more my marriage is more of a strategic partnership than a love connection. Sorry to say.
You can have both, have the kids and travel with them from a young age, it’s a matter of mindset and rolling with things that crop up.
Me and all of my friends all had kids post 30. I got pregnant with my first at 34 with zero issues and in no time at all. My best friend had her first at 30 and another at 35. My mom had me at 37. My grandma had her 6th at 42. No issues with any of these pregnancies or births. Also, you can have NIPT/ various other testing done if you’re worried about genetic diseases. Also, traveling doesn’t end because you have kids. We have flown with our baby and are looking forward to more trips. Once you have children, you may find your destinations change but you can still go to fun places. Finally, why not freeze your eggs if you’re concerned?
Visual Storyteller
The older the riskier. Also, you want to be a mom not a grandma to your kids.
Enthusiast
My mom had me at 37. My parents do not look like they are in their 60s at all and they definitely believe it’s because they had kids later.