Verge of turning 40, having a mini crisis. Unmarried. No kids. No relationship. On the verge of a nice SM offer from B4, but recruiter is telling me many people from my firm looking to leave are exiting to industry because SM & MD roles are super hectic. I don’t understand how MD comp is structured at Accenture as an example but recruiter keeps pointing to how it’s lucrative but massive effort. I’m 40 & not sure I want to go deeper in consulting. Should I just exit to industry?

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Unpopular opinion, at 40 i would prioritize having kids/ relationship( if that’s what you want) first then career. Realistically, you can always have a great career and live comfortably financially. I think having a hectic job will take a way from that in the near future.

likehelpful

Agree. I quit consulting to do this ^

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I think you can be an MD and find personal life / relationship balance. It’s not that much more work than a director and you know that deal already. Do what you think you’ll enjoy most and Freeze your eggs in the meantime!

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So what’s the problem with accepting the role and seeing for yourself? If you don’t like it, exit to industry, your exit oops may be better after having that SM title. Typically people that exit at this level get high positions, doesn’t mean they won’t require effort. I know people in industry that work just as much as Consulting, and some that don’t. One can’t generalize, it will depend on the job.

What’s the alternative here? Decline offer than apply to industry?

likeuplifting

Three years ago I had just made manager at Deloitte and decided I needed better wlb and it was time to prioritize everything else besides work, which was the focus of my life for the last ten years. I know it’s not close to the decision your making at your level, but it was the best decision looking back. It’s crazy how much change occurs when you consciously reprioritize. 3 years later and I’m married with a kid on the way and in a job I love that is actually just as lucrative as consulting. Sure maybe it would have happened if I stayed in consulting, but I really don’t think so.

likeuplifting

Take the offer. It’s guaranteed! If you don’t have a relationship already then there’s no guarantee you’ll find one instantly (at least the right one). Even if you choose to have kids without a relationship that’ll still take time and $$$ and Accenture offers both adoption assistance and egg freezing options.
You can always quit a hard job or find a role that feels easier but you cannot go back in time and take an offer you turned down. Just my two cents as a 38 year old who made similar choices recently!

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The recruiter has their interests in mind, not yours, and is persuasive. Get facts not opinions from them, verify them elsewhere (eg talk to mentors to understand MD role and comp), and then think for yourself.

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I’m 41 in the same boat. When I was 39 I left Big 4 as a SM because I saw no future WLB in being able to not travel and have time and headspace to focus on meeting someone. Leaving for boutique was absolutely the right decision for me to focus on different aspects of life. (Of course pandemic derailed a lot for me). Anyway my thought is to chase what’s important to you - maybe do some coaching sessions or visualizations to understand what your priorities are. Good luck!

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I work at CrossCountry Consulting now

Where’s the crisis? You have a good oppty in front of you, and you’re thinking about the what-ifs of the unknowns with no prospects?

Are you happily unmarried? Do you want kids? If you’re good with how your life is, and you enjoy working, take the next best step! Also, different company and environment might lead to new connections—maybe your mate is waiting for you on the other side of this decision.

Life will be what you make it. Carpe diem!

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