We are throwing my daughter 2 parties this year for her second birthday. Trying to keep the parties smaller because some of the people invited are not vaccinated including the kids. Not a debate post. I sent out the menu as we were going to have everyone pick their own meals off a restaurant menu and then each person would get a lunch box with their own dinner. I thought it was a good idea and sent it out to my family last week. My mom tells me today that half of the people coming won’t eat cont

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“Hi mom, that’s not going to work. Our plan is to order from (original restaurant). If that doesn’t work for anyone they are welcome to (eat before or after/bring food of their choosing). Hope to still see you this weekend. Thanks, bye!”

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Part of me feels guilty because they are all driving an hour to get to our house and I want everyone to be able to eat at the party but the last minute thing is what is the most frustrating

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I would just order pizza for them at this point. That is incredibly rude and disrespectful. Sorry they are doing that to you. And congratulations!

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This is insane. What if you cooked the food from restaurant 1? No one would have a chance to say anything, they would show up, eat it and enjoy the party. You’ve been far too kind in accepting meal orders at all from your guests in my opinion!

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Do they have dietary restrictions or something? Kinda odd that your mom would know that other people won’t eat there. Or is it really just your mom who won’t eat there? I guess if it’s just a matter of picking up the food from restaurant B instead of restaurant A, it’s really not that big a deal to accommodate. But no question it’s rude and you shouldn’t feel bad if you choose to stick with your original plan.

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Your idea of lunchboxes is kind and accommodating. I would be quite excited to put my order in :)
I’d take issue with, if this is even factual, why are the guests going to your mom to tell her they won’t eat the food instead of calling you and saying sorry, I have XY dietary restriction so is it ok if I bring sandwiches for us (or whatever). Is mom inclined toward drama? Could it be that her and one hysterical aunt (for example) have decided that the food is not what they want and trying to control the situation?
I’d stand my ground on the restaurant and explain if anyone has an issue please contact you direct so you can organize what’s needed, and also mention that you’ll be popping out plenty of dips, chips, carrot/celery sticks etc so no one will go hungry. And if possible I’d do all this in a slightly dismissive, extremely even and cool tone. Be confident - you know what you’re doing, and it’s not weird or in accommodating in any way.

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Anything from the restaurant I picked and the party is this coming Saturday for them.
I am frustrated that she didn’t tell me last week when I sent out the menu and I’m trying not to stress about it because I’m also 9 weeks pregnant and only so many people know at this point. I’m also not feeling well because of morning sickness or all day sickness.
She went ahead and chose another restaurant and decided that’s the one we should order from instead. I’m feel disrespected because I love my family but they are so last minute people that do things that cause stress right before family gatherings. I know if my in laws would have done this I would have lost it, and I did lose it on my mom but I’m trying to control my emotions because it’s the first time we are all going to be together for a family gathering since before covid

Thank you all for reiterating my thoughts. I thought I was overly emotional about it and my husband was taking my side.

It’s my mom and dad which is 2/8 people we are inviting. They are also the only drivers for the rest of the people who are coming so if they wouldn’t come then no one will. They are all car pooling up to our house (45min-1 hr) drive from where they all live.
I dk I’m over it and will probably see if there is a restaurant with more of a diverse menu and go from there. It’s my daughter’s first real party since last year we did virtual parties

The boxed lunches were a really great idea. Let it go and enjoy the party, take lots of pictures of your girl turning 2!

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