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Jummah Mubarak Fam ☪️💚
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Jummah Mubarak Fam ☪️💚
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"Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest." 13:28
Rising Star
When I was lonely, I went back to the basics. You're in a new city so family is probably hard to get a hold of. In your situation eat out, do outdoor activities, spend time solidifying relationships with friends, find your passion(s), sort your relationship with the big G, and focus on yourself!
It takes time, but enjoy the journey!
You got this!!!
Find a near by gym and workout . That’s what I do and that really relaxes me, besides praying and listening to Quran recitations and translations
Trying going to a masjid more often if there is one close by. Call your family and friends more often. Set a few goals. Stay positive.
Gosh I feel this in my soul. It is so hard being alone. I moved across the country on my own and the first two weeks were soooo hard. I would suggest getting out and making friends. Joining groups on facebook really helped me to make new friends
Rising Star
Make new friends and try things out of your comfort zone. Also do a lot of self love solo activities (I love solo dinners and movies)
Also make new pen pals or old pen pals.
Focus on your deen, and self love and self care. Develop who you are outside of the relationship. How much have you changed since, how many habits of theirs did you adopt simply by proxy.
Also all those little hobbies and goals you say oh one day Im gonna learn French, or guitar, or run a marathon. Start making those bad boys happen. And even revisit hobbies you liked as a child, and possibly join groups. I love photography so I can talk someones ear off about that.
And journal, and heal from this relationship. Give yourself time to grieve this loss and keep hopeful for the future. Also going to the office wouldnt hurt if youre remote. :)
Good luck!
Travel
I would join some co-ed sports league if you're athletic or a networking group
Rising Star
Thanks all. Will try a few things.
I’ve moved to a new place before and I can normally cope alright. But the breakup was like a 1-2 punch out of nowhere and has really messed with my head.
Bismillah alrahman alraheem
First of all, may Allah help you in your time of need.
Second, I believe that as someone here noted earlier it is always best to turn back to Allah for all things especially when in distress or lonely as we've seen from the Quran and Sunnah.
I would do this by simply visiting the masjid, helping with any events to get involved and meeting new people there. This creates a great environment of learning, respect and piety.
When moving to an entirely new state I only looked at apartments near a masjid, alhamdulilAllah I was blessed with a great community I feel at home with and I have been able to make great friends, find a knowledgeable teacher to learn from and actually contribute to the community I am in which makes me feel important to a cause bigger than myself.
Third of all, I believe two things about your situation, one if the relationship was Haram, tobah is in order, may Allah accept from both of us. Second, what happened is the qadr of Allah and indeed it is an opportunity to free you from something that was bad for you to bring you closer to him by perhaps some of the methods I mentioned above. By the way I'm not passing judgement as when I moved down I has recently broken up with my GF and wanted a fresh start so I'm totally empathetic of where you are coming from but I had to give the sincere advice I believe to be correct.
May Allah make it easy for you.
Yeah I completely get it, I found it helpful to make myself of use to the community even in super small ways although as consultants alhamdulilAllah we have very useful skillsets the community is in need of. For example, our masjid has weekly iftar, I walked up to the table giving food and asked if I can help just putting the spoons on the paper plates, 2 weeks later I befriended the brothers distributing the food, found out the masjid needed help making a flyer for an event, and I made it, met the people who ran the masjid that way. It can even be staying after prayer to clean up a little, there's a Hadith about the prophet SAW being upset that his companions didn't tell him the lady who used to clean passed away so he can pray her janaza, so he went as soon as he found out and prayed it, walahi even the little things make a difference in a community we all have a role to play to help this ummah and it gives us that feeling of being needed and belonging. And if at the very least you're at the Masjid for prayers and lectures every week than walahi you have made great strides in getting closer to Allah and you will surely be rewarded for it.