What is the best way to attract a new mate? I got out of a 7 year relationship (he was cheating on me for half of it) and I’m so confused on where to even start. I have a therapist and working on my trust issues - but I have self confidence issues. I’ve been burned for being ‘unattractive’. But I’ve seen girls that are objectively more unattractive than me have mates. So it must be a confidence issue? Those girls seem to glow while I am so sad. Or it’s the guys I go on dates with?

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People pick up on your energy. The best way to attract people is to feel great about yourself. Start by doing things that make you feel like you are becoming a better version of yourself- taking care of yourself, pursuing your interests. The vibe you give off will attract guys.


Focus on yourself first get better continue to work with your therapist. Find new interest and hobbies self-love is your priority. You shouldn’t rely on a men to feel better about yourself ☺️Learn to be alone after 7 years you need a break or you will attract the same type or relationship. You can do this!


Yeah - so someone dm’ed me from this post. “Shooting his shot.” And we exchanged pictures, and he said we weren’t a match and blocked me.

I did this as an experiment. No judgement on him. We didn’t really exchange much personal info or make a mental connection. But off of just personal physical looks … it stung to get rejected so quickly.


Unfortunately, this is very common - Don’t take it personally unless he was being obnoxious or disrespectful in any way. It’s all about the other person and not you.

I have experienced the same thing a few times, and I personally think it is better that they block or don’t respond, as opposed to saying it flat out that they didn’t feel any attraction.

Keep your head up!

You should find someone to hook up with. Purely physical relationship will help you realize you’re just as attractive as all the others out there. You may even have some tricks the others don’t.

Gotta keep telling yourself that you’re the S until you believe it. Others will too.


from your salary, every damn month, set a side whatever amount you can and call it self love- I put $100 every 2-3 months for hairstyle, nails or facial whatever the hell will make me feel good about myself and make me glow---- STOP following and watching instagram and other girls and guys everyone has a story sad or happy never judge.... I'm not rattling that love yourself and bla bla we all know this shit... you need to look in the fing mirror every morning after your morning face routine and get your shit together... now for the mate, if you really want to, go to events not clubs.. events that have the same type of "mates" you're realistically know you accept to be with "like religion culture etc"....

that dude was a complete insecurity and kick that

Do you feel ready to start dating?

I would take Director 1’s advice on trying new things or exploring your interests/hobbies. I really like using MeetUp and it’s a good way to find like minded people. It is awkward the first couple of times but it is what it is.

Try going out and finding yourself a new mate, rather than sitting around waiting for one to come to you. Gotta go out and get what you want

All the women I've truly fallen in love with, I wasn't physically attracted to until I got to know them.

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