What is the DUMBEST task you've had to own, as a highly paid consultant?

likefunnysmartupliftinghelpful
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

I went with the client to pick up two cakes at grocery store. Each had a suggested project name in icing. Whichever cake was eaten more during a large meeting was picked as the project name. (Seriously)

likefunnysmarthelpfuluplifting

Who was the winner

like

Flew internationally to deliver a birthday present from the client CEO to his son who lived in another country

(Emerging markets, so shipping was unavailable/unreliable)

likefunnyupliftingsmart

Which country?

like
Recent IconRecent

I once heard of an analyst nicknamed “lunch b***h”. He flew to the client site every single week, but his only responsibility was to collect lunch orders for the project each day.

likefunnyhelpfulsmart

What a chode

like

I once ran around a tiny town for ~4hrs looking for 24-piece puzzles because the partner on my project thought that the 36-piece puzzles I’d ordered ahead of time from amazon would be “too hard” for groups of ~5 executives to complete in 5 minutes. 🙄

likefunnyupliftingsmart

Icebreaker ⛏

Just being there. No task or project or problem. The client literally wanted me because it gave them psychological comfort.

likefunnyupliftinghelpful

Same, the last two months of my previous project was that. I sat in a decent meeting room by myself and they would stop in maybe once a week to ask a stupid question that could be found in a matter of seconds on google. I did certification work and was billable for it 🤷‍♂️

likesmartfunny

Converting Microsoft Word documents into PDFs for my client.

likefunnysmartuplifting

Same

Telling a client (who hard coded all his numbers into Excel and used a desktop calculator because he didn’t realise that Excel wasn’t just for formatting) why his budget was £200k out because of rounding errors.

likefunnysmart

Absolute gold

Turning business requirements that the client had already come up with into user stories for the developers even though the developers could just, like, read the business requirements.

likefunnysmart

@SCM1 I agree! They could have a lower paid kid right out of undergrad doing this but instead they are paying a much higher rate for a person with an MBA to waste away ughhhhhhhhhh I’m getting dumber

Getting the Partner’s Coffee. My team made me walk 15 mins down the street to a shop EVERYTIME he said he wanted something. Only reason I was happy was he also let me buy coffee on his card.

likefunnysmarthelpfuluplifting

“SOMEONe has to get the coffee...”

Get your own coffee ffs...

like

Client requested that I use billable time to edit and upload videos of my pet pig that I was required to take each weekend

likefunnyupliftingsmarthelpful

Hi sheldon

likesmart

One of our senior consultant once provided an estimate to customer of 120 hours to store “Last Changed On” on a standard SAP Opportunity object. Customer accepted it. When I got into the project, after that senior consultant quit mid way thru the project, I realized, that neither customer nor our senior consultant knew that it was a standard field and all the customer/consultant needed to do was “customize/unhide” the hidden field which would take around 45 seconds for a grandpa using the mouse and computer for the first time.

likefunnysmarthelpful

Sounds just like my manager!

I sat outside a CEO’s office for 4 hours waiting on him to arrive so a partner could just time his walk by just right.

likefunny

That’s how I met your mother

like

Flew from Canada to the UK for one day because a partner forgot his laptop. 😂

likefunnyupliftingsmart

At least you got to earn those miles!

I spent a full 8 hours creating an bitmoji of my client. This included a bitmoji “booklet”, telling her which versions of her bitmoji would be used in which context/correspondence.

She was a budget director for a major agency. 🤦‍♀️

likefunnysmart

What kind of agency? Public!?

Being flown in just to sit at client site and twiddle my thumbs because they presumably like me. 8 hours a day of firm initiatives and Twitter. Oh, and 2 hour lunches to keep me sane.

likefunnyhelpful

Yep. Spent months flying in to prep for placing labels on inventory items. That took 4 hours on a Thursday.

like

I (a woman) will never forget when I was meant to be going on a site inspection with a male manager and a male consultant, and the day before the trip the manager goes “(male consultant), you’re in charge of putting together summaries and questions for the three sites. (My name) you’re in charge of snacks.”

likefunnyuplifting

Someone’s gotta buy the snacks...

like

Never had a client deliverable of any kind for the first 10 years of my professional life. The last few years have been tough.

likefunnysmartuplifting

I think P1 was not in consulting the first 10 years

likehelpful

Once upon a time on my first project out of college...

Spent months (learning how to and then) building an excel scenario model for a project. Week before final handover, I worked 6-7 days straight in State A with only a few hours sleep, including none at all the night before.

Sent the Partner and Principal the final (double, triple, quadruple checked) model and presentation (they were in State B) at 5am. Headed to the airport to get a flight to State B. Got home. “WFH”.

Next minute I got a “Plz Fix” call from a ranting Partner who demanded I get to the client site ASAP, model not working. Fuck.

Shower, shave, find shirt. Travel 2+ hours to client HQ where Partner and Principal have been sat in a room for the last half a day.

Turns out the Partner renamed the model in the cab to the client site (and I hadn’t yet learned about dynamic referencing).

likefunnysmartupliftinghelpful

Oh didn’t think there were macros involved. Let’s not get “into the weeds” here 😜

funnysmart

Made an enormous bulletin board display. Think like a preschool wall, but on a BCG budget.

likefunny

Can’t post. It featured the client logo and color palette quite prominently, sorry!

like

Copying and pasting ‘Click Save’ in hundreds of test scripts for a client.

likefunnysmarthelpful

I’ll see you one better - adding ‘Return Home’ to the end of each test script because the client wasn’t sure what to do when the test was over.

like

Related Posts

How much a project manager should get?

like

Does anyone have a template to poll a TA team on time in task? Trying to evaluate how much time a team spends on Admin duties.

like

How soon should I follow up after sending an application? I sent my files exactly a week ago through a portal (Edjoin for school jobs) and it says “District viewed”.

likehelpful

Is Indy a good place to raise a family? Looking to hear from people who actually live here lol

like

I feel like my track record of saying "yes" to everything is coming back to bite me. I'm glad pp recognize me as a team player & know they can lean on me, but I'm now swamped with side projects w/ quick TATs, ON TOP of my reg work for clients. How do u say "I physically can't do all of this" without disappointing some1? Something's gotta give, at this point, as I'm burning weekend hrs to keep up. But I fear losing my rep as a hard worker.

like

How to become a CTO from a Software Engineer? And how much years of experience would it take?

likehelpful

Salary of Associate Director- Procurement & SCM in OLA Mobility ?

like

Do they have golf courses in Argentina? What are the chances he just says “eff it” and stays down there? Please

like

34 M Pakistani, based in SoCal, liberal, openminded, looking for a moderate or liberal Muslim F partner in life. If anyone is interested in chatting, do let me know 😊

likehelpful

Curious - what are your thoughts on remote work? Pro, con? Anyone gone fully remote and regret it?

like

Anyone else find themselves shopping for baby clothes way too much? Send help! :) (And yes, I know they grow out of it quickly, yes, I know it's silly, just here for laughs)

like

Do you know what’s funny?

Has anyone heard about an offer for employment be rescinded because the background check showed a drivers license suspension 2 years ago due to a third party firm error not informing me on the results of the disputed ticket and requirement to pay ticket fees within specified time. The drivers license has since been in good order and is currently valid but the record shows a past suspension for a speeding ticket.

like

Hi Team,

I have a offer from
Virtusa company for 6 month contract Data engineer role in Bristol UK location.
They said the contract will keep upgrade.
And salary is 280 GBP/Day .

Did anyone here working from London/UK location or working in London from Virtusa.

Please share your experience in terms of cost of living and expenses.Virtusa Wipro Newco

like

I love sunny weather so much; it significantly elevates my mood, which is a free lunch! The summer in NY was amazing but considering taking a precautionary step for the winter by relocating for a couple/few months to a sunny place like Miami. My job accommodates this.

Have you heard of anyone doing such climate-based back-and-forth? Any tips or advice? Also, how’s Miami for a New Yorker?
TIA!

like

Hello Fishes,

Which Institute is best out of below 3 for 3/6 Month - Data Science Program Online ?
 
1. Intellipaat

2. Udemy

3. Simpli Learn

Please suggest if any other Institute if above these 3 are not good.

like

We have a lot of inexperienced managers and leaders throughout the company. I wanted to propose bringing on a L&D leader who has experience creating long-term curriculums for managers and executives. For those that have a management training philosophy, who runs it and how often,m?

likesmart

Hello I’m currently working as an account executive and the company I work for basically is commission only .
I really love the insurance world, I worked had to get my RIBO license and want to move into another company where I can grow and have a salary plus comission.
Anyone else has done this transition?
Any tips, advise on salary range expectations? Thank you!

like

As the job market recovers and tech talent becomes especially sought-after, some job seekers can be at a crossroads.

Fledgling startup or a big, established company: where would you work?

Working at a startup helps you pick up new cross-functional skills, forces you to dig deeper into your reserves, and allows leadership opportunities.

Big companies typically have a more structured path for career growth, offer benefits and perks to employees, and are perceived as more stable.

Thoughts?

like

Hey 🐠

Can anyone tell me about the quality of Salesforce projects in Infosys ?
I have accepted the offer from Infosys just want to know about what type of work should I expect.

TIA 😇

like

Additional Posts in Consulting

You know how they say nothing tastes as good as skinny feels? Wrong! 🍛

like
like

My firm has a mentor scheme whereby you meet monthly with a senior person at the firm to speak informally about work, career, etc. How to make the most out of it?

like

Good morning, Patagonia Vest Consultant writing, what songs should I have on my party playlist for tonight?

likefunny

@EY strategy - Currently in Chicago, maybe thinking of New York, LA,or SF. Any drawbacks for the cities? Might want a change from Chicago...

like

Anyone ever been contacted by a headhunter from Consulting Point? Legit firm or scam central?

like

ACN: CDO and C&M ... Please explain the damn difference as both have done each other's roles all the time. Also Salaries please. Want to know if the firm really is baselining them.

like

I got an email to register for a leadership program and I was so happy.... Then it got retracted. This might be my final straw.

likefunny

Are there non-FAANG companies with comparable compensation & WLB? It seems impossible to break into FAANG.

likefunny

Flying back from Seattle for 6 pm flight, anyone want to meet up at the bar?

like

Just had the craziest experience avoiding a bully attempt. I think I barely made it out alive (knock on wood)! Still in shock that this kind of stuff actually happens... #chooseyournetworkwisely

like

What common traits have you identified in your fellow consultants?

like

Went on three dates in last three weeks. Two of them backed out when they came to know that I travel everyweek. The one left was unhappy this morning when I got up at 4 to catch my flight. FML !

like

I have an external hard drive from years ago that stopped working. Anyone have success stories on how they fixed theirs?

like

Anyone at Deloitte working within healthcare regulatory willing to chat?

Fucking hate Delta. Missed my flight. I was with my 4 months old 👶 daughter. She was hungry and crying I requested em to let me check in bag early instead waiting in Line. They said no. Morons.

like

A bowl for "thirsty" consultants on travel a good idea or nah? Kind of like that movie about an elite hook up ring for working professionals who don't have time to date

like

What’s an appropriate salary for a PMO Manager role at Apple in California?

like

Will be starting a strategy consulting role @ T2 in a few months. I have 2.5 YOE doing tech implementation at a smaller firm. Any recommendations on books/podcasts (really anything) to help me prep?

likefunny

Just wanted to say that this is the second Saturday in a row where I took an afternoon nap, after a VERY long time, and I'm here to recommend that to everyone. 5 ⭐

likeupliftingfunnysmart

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal