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If the issue was an any type harassment I would take it to HR. Especially if a person harassing you was more senior and made threats of any kind when you tried to clarify the situation with them. It can happen to any other person after all so why not flag it early and have them investigated internally.
If it was something minor, done by your peer, I’d try to talk to them first and if didn’t work ( they would be indifferent to your concerns/ feedback or would continue with their behaviour) I would follow up with HR.
Here are my lines:
1. if it is sexual in nature and you made at clear (and I mean very clear) it was unwanted and he/she didn’t stop, report formally. For the sake of you and others who may be more junior. In dealing with these types of situations, these types of behaviors do not stop. Seek more than a note on his/her file. I fire people like that immediately. When you don’t, they find a way to do it again.
as hurt.
2. If it is hateful, intentional and continuing racism or sexism. Same as 1.
3. If it is a crime (with the exception of maybe catching someone smoking a joint), report and file a report with the police. I have a friend who has to deal with a stalker situation at work and was talked out doing a police report because the guy was already fired. It came back to bite him in the ass - horrible horrible story. Luckily no one w
All other things, I usually talk to them and give them a benefit of the doubt and hope they learn.
A couple of edits (wasn’t fast enough!):
- I would add retaliation to #2.
- anything that puts personal integrity or lack of thereof should be formally reported with consequences to pay and promotion.
Also, I would consult with HR but make your own mind. I have a great team, but not everyone does and some haven’t been sufficiently trained in how to handle these types of issues.
Good luck to you! Whatever it was, I hope you’re ok, OP. Don’t be afraid to seek help. Stuff like this messes with people.
Re partner 1’s #1 - harassment/assault are still a thing even if you didn’t make it “very clear” it was unwanted. I reported harassment and assault through HR and I’m glad I did it.
Filing formally can protect you and then it’s on file if anyone else reports the same person.
And addressing indirectly (to not out me specifically). HR has been informed and is available if I want to file formally. I have the opty to ‘wait and see' vs filing formally. Weighing pros and cons - what should I consider as to decide?
Go back to HR and ask where the usual and customary line is for your firm
You need to file now if you have any concerns at all. If you wait and he comes after you in the future comp/project/career-wise, you do not have a leg to stand on. The company can and will close ranks and say they didnt know about anything and have no liability and you will be on your own with no protections. Was in a similar situation in the past and dude came after me after he was named my direct manager — someone else in leadership and him had drinks and they mentioned something to him. So, even though I had formally filed, company claimed it wasnt an issue since I didnt “remind” them of the incident at the time he was named my direct manager. Don’t work for bad people is the lesson learned
I filed something 2 weeks ago. Has been ok until the past week. I’m struggling with what to do next as it’s all very indirect and underhanded stuff and doesn’t amount to anything direct.
KPMG1, I completely agree with you. I meant to to distinguish that unwanted and aggressive harassment from someone respectfully making a move and you saying no, and them accepting it.
Yes agree - that is different
Although, a partner respectfully making a move on an associate or anyone beneath him is still very inappropriate and could be reported
Thank you all for your feedback. It is very much #2 - I’m not in any immediate danger or risk. It recently has come to my attention that he made derogatory comments to our peers in the last year. If anything, Leadership has been very understanding and supportive. I’m currently weighing the benefits of remaining anonymous at this point vs. losing the anonymity. This is a former peer who was just recently promoted to be my direct manager. I very much appreciate the feedback and the support. Thank you!
Happy to have an offline discussion if you think it will help. burnerdwork@gmail.com
I would very much welcome that, if you do not mind! Will send an email shortly!