Would you be hurt if someone you thought was your close friend didn’t pick you as a bridesmaid? Just got a wedding invite with the bridesmaid list and surprised by who she picked

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Nope, trust me, NOT being a bridesmaid is a blessing. I have been a bridesmaid multiple times and they all turned into bridezillas and ultimately I lost contact with them after their wedding. Be a guest and enjoy!

likeupliftingsmart

THIS. I refuse to be in any more weddings idgaf, that's the boundary I'll be setting with everyone. I also don't planning on having any in mine.

likefunny

I was super hurt but honestly I just accepted that I was a “tier 2” friend and embraced that position. There are actually lots of perks of being a tier 2 friend. I simply wish her a happy birthday but don’t go out of my way to buy a gift or offer up a celebration. We rarely fight - I leave the drama for her and her besties etc etc.

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Nope, there’s a number of factors driving these decisions - was she a bridesmaids to them 1st? Are there family expectations?
Agree with the above, you can be a guest, not have to do any planning and just have a great time

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I've told all my friends they're doing me a huge favor by not involving me in their wedding party due to the time and financial commitment.

But if you're bothered, you're bothered. Not sure if there were other signs of one-sidedness before this, but if you're good friends, I would express that you're hurt and see if she has a reassuring explanation.

Some wedding decisions are totally arbitrary or political, so hopefully it wasn't a judgement about how close you are.

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I was honestly kinda hurt cuz I was so sure I’d be one of her bridesmaids :( based on what everyone above is saying, glad I wasnt involved but still, it made me re-examine my friendship

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Thanks for all the responses. I guess it just made me wonder if it was a judgment of our friendship 😔. I’ll attend the wedding and enjoy just being a guest I guess lol

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Aww it’s ok. All these little things are a blessing in the long run. It is a huge stretch in this case but anytime I come across such an experience I just consider it the trash taking itself out. You just move on. The ones that are meant to be will choose you. Be there for the wedding, enjoy, but now you know where you stand with this person.

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Even though I expected it because one of my bridesmaids has a lot of close girl friends from growing up (we met in college), I understood but was a little sad.

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Recently got married and picking the bridal party was an incredibly difficult decision. It’s so hard to draw a clear line. I agonized over it, and ended up not including 2 of my close friends (that I consider the same “tier” of friendship as my bridal party). Ultimately, it came down to picking 1 friend from each phase of life. I didn’t want a massive bridal party because 1. That can be a logistics nightmare and 2. I wanted to pay for their hair and makeup. Having said that, my friends didn’t care at all and had a great time at the wedding! Im thankful that they were so understanding and recognized that not being a bridesmaid doesn’t change how I feel about our friendship! It was a logistics based decision. Have some grace with your friend and have a great time at the wedding!

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