Would you ever message an ex-boss to say that he was a jerk?
PS: Several months after jumping to another firm.

likehelpfulfunny
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

You will gain mental peace only when you are able to let go of the past.

likesmart

Yes I went through a period of two years before I could put a difficult personal relationship behind me. Know what whatever you are feeling right now is valid, the challenge is not to get consumed by it. And that means finding outlets to release your emotions. I journaled a lot and also took up weight lifting to deal with my emotions.

Haha - no. It might make you feel good for a fleeting moment but if that person was a jerk, they really won't care. Also, presuming you have a better job now, you should actually be thankful that they were the catalyst to make you move on. I once had a tyrannical boss who fired me. My next job was at a startup that we ended up selling to Intel for millions. I had that first boss to thank for my good fortune. ;-)

like
Recent IconRecent

Your ex-boss hasn’t spent 2 brain cells thinking about you and here you are posting about that person. Move on.

like

This is the way

Post Photo
likeupliftingfunny

More like he rewrote the rant then pressed send...he did take away Ozai’s ability to firebend

like

Remember that your paths may cross again...

like

What do you gain? What do you lose?

like

Gain : mental peace
Lose: relationship, probably it's illegal if it's too personal and nasty

like

Well I had been out of job for a while and worked with this toxic boss of mine.. having less experience and money it felt too risky to quit.

Also didn't really try escalating for a while. When I did it was brushed under the carpet.

I was further put on the spotlight when I protested against firing of a female colleague who was being late multiple times (she had a small baby)

It would have been that I also was overthinking as I had dealt with little or no money and this job was probably keeping me comfortable.


Despite all that I never slept well during the time I worked with him

My relationship suffered and health too

Write an email or letter. Let it out. Don’t hit send. Or send it to a mentor as a release (warning them in advance of course)

like

Reminds me of that saying, “resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick.” This is bad for you, not him. Meditation? Therapy? Running? All better options than stewing and letting someone live in your head rent-free.

like

DONT PUT IT IN WRITING. IF YOU WANT TO CLEAR THE AIR, CALL THEM UP AND TELL THEM HOW THEY AFFECTED YOU UNDER THE GUISE OF CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK.

likehelpful

Don’t send. The world is far too small

like

You can always just go to the corresponding bowl and say it.

like

I did the opposite to try to smooth things over just in case we cross paths in the future

The guy is still a total a*hole, but atleast I don't have any lingering worries there

like

I don’t think I would do this. Vent to coworkers/friends/whoever will listen? Sure. But what do you gain from messaging this person? This person probably hasn’t given you a second thought tbh.

There’s really no reason to burn a bridge and open yourself up to potential trouble. Learn to forgive and move on. It’s hard. But forgiveness is not about admitting that what the other person did is ok. Forgiveness is about coming to terms with what happened and deciding not to continue harboring feelings of resentment and revenge and allowing this person to have power over you any longer. It’s about you and not the other person. By holding onto your anger and hatred, you’re really just allowing that person to continue having a negative effect on you long past whatever situation that originally hurt you.

like

Nope but I do make sure to keep them on my Christmas card list. It is a polite way to show them the finger.

funny

Don't put anything in writing

like

Why do this? If you thought your manager would be receptive to feedback, you’d have told them in person or sooner. So you’re just doing it out of spite which quite honestly is sad for you. Because it means even though you’re at a better job and place, you’re still focusing on this person who no longer should matter.

Why give them any thought at all? They’re behind you now.

like

Yeah... You can write it, but don't send it. Best to move on with your life. High potential to make your situation worse otherwise. Might as well appreciate the new situation and be happy with that rather than go out of your way to re-engage in the old one during your free time.

like

Not worth burning bridges by messaging that cold imo. Now if he was to reach out to you and ask you for a favor, I might let him have it

like

No waste of time

Related Posts

New teacher here: I have a collection of bins of books from garage sales, giveaways, hand me downs, etc. Looking for organization tips and best apps/websites to quickly level them!

like

So I recently started a position with Fox. When it was presented to me in interview, I was told I would be working aligned with Fox Sports & Entertainment, not so much News. Now that I’m here, I’m seeing everything I’ll be doing is with the News team & makes me uncomfortable. No diversity, outdated software & process.
Financially, it’s the best position I been in. But mentally in this environment, it’s depressing & slow. Nothing innovative or engaging. What would you do?

like

Looking for a freelance FinTech thought leadership writer with a portfolio. Bonus points if you specialize in the world of alternative investments. Emphasis on thought leadership.

like

Is it wrong to look for jobs less than a year in if you don’t feel like you’re accomplishing anything? Half of my day is spent doing self-started industry research because my boss isn’t around (cont)

like

How much to expect for tax manager salary in Denver?

like

My biggest mistake was accepting a promotion to manager, it made me realize that I'm not very good at managing people. Should I ask if I can go back to my old role?

likefunnysmarthelpful

Anyone rise to Partner despite major set backs earlier on their career (e.g., fired, laid off, mental illness, physical health problems)? Would like stories as a reminder that you guys are human.

like

I just logged in for open enrollment and see that my benefit costs are increasing quite a bit. Family of 4 - medical/dental/vision will be about $345/pay period plus whatever I contribute to my HSA. Is this the norm now or is this way too much? We are also on an income based rate plan and I recently crossed into the bottom of the most expensive tier so it’s an even bigger hit over the normal YoY increase.

“Arey oo bina signal key mobile”
What’s your best line?

funny

what is the lowest 20yr refinance rate at NYC you see now? And where?

like

DM or comment below if anyone is looking for job change.. and interested to apply in LTI

Ps. Need minimum 3 yrs of experience

I have never been asked to judge an awards show. Based on what I see on LinkedIn I may end up be the only one.

likehelpful

Which agencies have sabbatical programs for years of service?

like

How many coffees do you drink a day??

like

Is there any difference in prestige of a 1 year MBA vs 2 year?

like

Best banks for NRE/NRO accounts? And what service do you rely on transferring money to those accounts ?

This may not be true for everybody but a break from the kids with adult conversation plus a chance to get caught up on some work makes me smile.

Post Photo
likefunny

I have wipro 13lpa Capgemini 14lpa virtusa 16lpa.
Which one should i join. Looking for wlb with training support. Please suggest

like

What is the average percentage of bonus in Accenture.

I got offer of 9lpa with Accenture and in that fixed is 7.5lpa

1.5 lakh variable pay is there how an average Accenture employees get their bonus.

I have other offer with cognizant with 8.5 lpa and 8 lpa as fixed

I am from Hyderabad, Accenture gave me joining location as banglore and cognizant have me joining location Hyderabad.

Will Accenture team change the location in the offer letter?
I am totally confused which one join please help.

like

Additional Posts in Consulting Exit Opportunities

What’s the best way to show recruiters SQL skill set when trying to pivot to business analyst role ? Is there a respected SQL Certification I can get? Plan to also start learning python but seems sql is simple in demand skill I can showcase now. Thanks!

like

Is it a good idea to add your recruiter on LinkedIn after you start with the company?

like

Does anyone have recommendations on books or courses that do a really good job explaining step-by-step on how to start and run a mid-size business (local marketing agency, self storage real estate business, call center for third parties, etc.)

like

Finished my loop interviews with Amazon yesterday. How long does it typically take to hear the outcome?

like

Interviewing with a tech company. Intend to join only in January. Can I state that upfront in the interview? Or do I pretend it’s immediate and negotiate date after offer?

like

Looking for full stack developer to join my early startup. We are a small team but hoping to grow a lot this year. Must love books and geeky stuff

like

Which FAANG companies have non-tech PM roles?

like

Thoughts on moving from M&A Consulting to Investor relations at a public company (not fundraising for a fund)? Thinking mostly about finding a balance between an interesting job and having a life.

I've seen consulting is not a traditional background there; anyone made/tried to make the jump?

like

My best friend is an amazing graphic designer - the best one I know. Is anyone aware of graphic designer roles at their companies or recommendations on where one should look?
Interested in US, Canada, Europe

like

Any ideas about the type of “healthcare” roles in Amazon, Best Buy and Walmart? FYI - background is strategy consulting in health.

like

McKinsey & Company Looking to get into supply chain consulting. Background in Tech, Ag, and MFG. Any referrals available or angles I should look into? KPMG PwC EY McKinsey & Company Microsoft

like

Does EYP Deal Tech fall under T2 bucket in terms of prestige or B4 bucket ?

like

Any thoughts/insights on the KPMG investment banking practice?

like

Our Data and Analytics practice is hiring, DM if interested!

likefunny

When to put in two weeks notice? I've received and signed my offer letter- best practices to wait for background check to clear?

like
like

MBB folks, need some advice.

I am a Senior Con at Deloitte Tech (18 months in through a top MBA). I am 33 and have a kid. I am moving to Canada and exploring options. I have been advised by some ...

like

Was offered an analyst position at VillageMD . Can anyone give me some insight about the culture, pace of work, etc?

like

Thinking of exiting to pre-retirement type job. Something non-profit or at least beneficial with decent benefits. Any suggestions?

like

4 years at MBB, 3 years at FAANG, looking to join VC fund as principal+ Do you know someone who’s done this? What’s your advice on networking with funds, startups, incubators, etc?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal