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I was laid off during Deloitte‘s mass layoff in July of last year. I have worked as an independent contractor since and projects haven’t been consistent at the client I’m working for. I’m looking to get back into a big firm and was seeing if anyone would be able to refer me or help get my foot in the door. I was a business analyst for 1.5 years at Deloitte and have several years of additional experience which I’d be more than happy to share.
Only 2 more days till Consultant Friday!!
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Buy myself a celebratory Happy Meal. Eat it by myself in my car
Dwell in anxiety about how and why I got this money, and whether I’m “good enough” and actually deserve this 😭
Pro
Et tu, Brute?
1. Immediately resign, same day.
2. Immediately hire the world's best attorney and financial advisor/s.
3. Get on a plane and spend some quality time with my parents, who are in their 80s.
4. Give a bunch of money to my good brother and his daughters. Pay off his house and offer to pay for their college--but only if I approve of the school (no kommie schools).
5. Give zero money to my evil brother--but his ex-wife and daughter both get some. Pay off her house. Same as above for this niece and her college.
6. Pay off my primary residence, then start the real estate search and buy a few new pads.
7. Increase my personal training from 2 days a week to 5.
8. Go on a long yoga retreat in Costa Rica.
Wow...this is fun!
All the ivy leagues and most other universities in this country sadly. Full of fluff and brainwashing rather than teaching actual facts and real history.
Go golf every day for a month and then figure it out
I get up, get dressed and go to work like every other day.
Lmao
Chief
Save half ($25m) for taxes
Of the remaining half ($25m), 60% in VOO or similar ETF + 20% in bonds + 10% to family + 10% to myself
Fly to a small remote Christmas village in the Swiss Alps to clear my head and get away from any potential threats and then start to figure it out
Only one real answer here
Disappear
Concerning, but also relatable
Immediately throw my work computer out of the window
1. Buy a dope road bike
2. Call an attorney
3. Call a financial advisor
4. Do what attorney and financial advisor say
5. Maybe buy another road bike
The correct amount of bikes to own is n+1
Rising Star
Get a divorce
Move somewhere by the ocean
Pay off my favorite family members debts
Take a year to figure out what I want to do next
Rising Star
Money
Would be totally worth it
Start panicking about filing taxes for 2023
Nah. Hire someone to do the panicking for you and breathe easy.
Quit my job, focus on investing the money.
Start a non-profit with the capital gains in excess of living expenses.
1) try to figure out what I did and have no memory of it
2) maybe call police coz someone obviously break into my house and is now in my bedroom handing me a check
3) see if the check is from a Nigeria prince
Pay off all the family debts. Buy my mom a nice little house up north and get her top of the line health care. Get my stepfather top of the line mental health care. Make sure the family kids are set for life. Make a generous donation to my religion of choice and get everything I need for solo practice. Set up a self maintaining trust that I can access without being there in person.
Then buy some aloha shirts and disappear like I robbed Fort Knox.
Not quite a tithe. My religion is one of those with homework, so basically, it's "have lots of money, give me enough homework so I can disappear forever".
It more or less comes down to me sitting on a beach somewhere warm wearing an aloha shirt and khakis where I'm that odd guy that people think was a government spook.
Start a family investment office
Different banks will start at different levels but usually around $40-50M
Quit my job. Invest in some safe assets. Set up trusts for my kids. Buy a new house and take some time to consider what I want to do next.
Immediately quit consulting
Log onto my laptop and send an email to my company “I resign.”