I used to think I had to “have it all figured out” by 30. Career, relationship, savings, confidence… all neatly wrapped. I’m 35 now, and the truth is, I feel like I’m just starting to understand what I want, and it looks nothing like I imagined. Anyone else feel like they grew into themselves a little later than expected? I'd love to hear how your vision for your life changed once you stopped chasing someone else's version of "success."

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35 was a key moment for me too. I’m even older now and I’ll say - what you want from life, career, relationships will continue to change and evolve. It’s a bit of a revelation.

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Absolutely. I turned 36 this year and I feel more me now than I ever did in my 20s. I spent so long chasing milestones that weren’t really mine—jobs that looked good on paper, a relationship timeline I thought I should be on. Letting go of all that has been scary, but also freeing. Redefining success in my own terms has honestly been the best glow-up yet.

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👆🏽THIS
I will add as you mature, understand that you are constantly evolving

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i’m in my late 50’s and still trying to figure it all out. We change it as we age and the things we want and are important to us also change I think the trick is to never stop growing.

smart

Happy for all my sisters who are on this journey and hopeful for those who want to start the journey.

I'm figuring it out as I go along. I used to measure life by one year, three years, and five year goals. With life presenting challenges every day, I just pray for health and stability and make conscious decisions to get closer to my desired outcomes. If I encounter success on the way, that's great. The pressures to be this and that only add stress to my mental health. Life is too short to be worried about hitting milestones that societal pressures dictate. I'm worried about being able to have good sleep at night, having a healthy and working body, and friends/families/significant others that cherish me and vice versa. I'm mindful of a few other things, of course, but I'm letting go of goals that don't align to the lifestyle I want to achieve as I get older. Being content is way better than being stressed.

I am 34 and feel the same way as you. I thought I would have kids by 30 and now I think back to that and laugh because who did I think I was haha. I can't imagine having kids right now, I am still trying to figure things out for myself.

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