Any general advice on how one shops for an engagement ring? I’m starting to think about it but know very little.

Start by figuring out what they want - type of cut, design of the ring. My wife was incredibly specific about wanting a princess cut solitaire (she’d let it drop in conversation… 🙄) so it was a matter of getting the most ring in that style for the budget I had.

If you want it to be a complete surprise, try commenting on a ring in a tv show in terms and see how they react. If they have a close friend that you can trust to ask, do so.

And then budget - how much can you/are you willing to spend? How much do you think they expect you to spend? A custom ring made by a jeweler is a baller move, but at the end of the day, an off the shelf ring from a high street/mall jeweler is just fine. Check other rings they have for rough sizing - you can have it resized after the fact, but they’ll likely appreciate being able to walk away from the proposal with it on.

Orrrrrrr - just ask them what kind of ring they want… I think it’s less romantic, but I also have a couple of friends whose spouses don’t trust them to choose a toothpaste brand and there was no way they were buying the ring on their own.

Play around on rarecarat - I bought my wife’s ring using them 7+ years ago, great way to get a sense of options and pricing.

Don't do what my husband did! We went ring shopping together. I showed him the one I wanted. He picked another ring that was more expensive, thinking that would impress/surprise me. Nope! It was a totally different style/cut than I wanted. We ended up spending another $5k modifying the ring when we got the wedding band soldered on, just so I could find it palatable 😂

Get a fake on Amazon that looks nice for under $50 that she can use in the future for travel or times she doesn’t want to wear the real thing. Use this for the big question.
Then find out what she wants and buy the real thing.
My husband bought me a beautiful ring but I wish he had spent less and got me something that was more low profile.

My husband took particular note of the jewelry I wear and picked something out that was the same style. I love my ring and think he knocked it out of the park. She may also be dropping hints about it, so pay close attention if you’re out shopping and see jewelry to see if she says anything.

I went a different route.

I talked to her friends, and the ones I knew could keep a secret. Got all the Intel I needed to knock it out of the park.

She got a "perfect for her" ring that she still smiles at, 26+ years later. Had i not sought help, I would have spent 2 times as much, and gotten it wrong.

I’d also add talk to her on whether she’s open to moissanite/other “fake” diamonds. The good ones are about 1/2 the price and look just as good. I love my ring and wouldn’t change a thing now, but I do wish he had saved 5k and got a moissanite gem instead.

Stop at least 3 months of in come on the ring if you’re really in love. Anything less is a sign…

I took her into a jewelry store at the mall—I told her I wanted to “look at watches.” Then I observed what rings caught her eye as she browsed the store.